Feeling sad...

Honestly, I would just let her look stupid. Clearly, your little ones are doing great, but she's not a part of that business. Maybe slyly sneak an invite to a game or practice or something to her? Tell her you'd like company while you did this or thay with you kiddo. Make her a little uncomfortable by killing it with kindness!

@Alisa my sister is constantly on Facebook and I have been posting photos from the girls soccer games and practices. She would normally try to go to a game or practice. She doesn't like her or comment on any of my posts but I know she must see them. We have games on Saturdays and Sundays. I'm very close with my mom and she is trying to stay out of it. But she has no clue why my sister is ignoring me.

I'm curious...do you think there could be jealousy or insecurities at all in your sister? That maybe she's saying that she thinks negatively of your choices, but deep down there is envy that you are accomplishing it all and raising bright happy girls? I don't know, sometimes this is the case. 🤔

@Ashley My husband actually brought this up. So I only work once a month now because I'm homeschooling both of my kids. I used to work part-time when I was only homeschooling my oldest. She could be upset that I'm home? She's 16 years older than me. One would think that she would be happy for me? It's bizarre though because she used to say the most positive uplifting things about homeschooling to my face. So I was shocked when I heard the opposite from other people. I have no clue why she stopped talking to me. She has her own side business and she has been extremely busy with that. But it doesn't take much effort to text someone back and she is constantly on her phone. I definitely feel like I'm being purposely cut off.

And im so sorry that you are feeling sad. It's completely understandable you would feel this way. To not have any understanding or knowledge of these negative feelings and to find out all this from others and then to have her just silently pull away. I imagine that is heartbreaking. I know you say that you can't speak to her, but do you think you could at all if approached in an honest and vulnerable way? Like just saying, "Hey, I really miss my sister. Is there anything that happened or that I did that I am unaware of? If so, I would love to talk it through because we're sisters, and I love you"... type of convo.

To add salt to the wound.... I had always told her that I sometimes feel isolated and lonely without having a work life. Zero regrets about homeschooling and my kids will always come first. But there's always that bit of loneliness you get when you don't have any sort of friends outside of the house. She knows this and she still has been ignoring me for a solid month. I always look to her as my sister my BFF but clearly she never thought of me in that way.

Ughhh, im.so sorry. Truly heartbreaking to not really have her support. To have her say supportive things and then find out she didn't actually mean any of it. So confusing too. I resonate with the loneliness. Itcan feel pretty isolating to be home all the time with young ones. I am doing the same. And although I feel the same, like I don't regret it and want the best for my son, it can also still be hard. Both are true simultaneously, and that's okay. I dont homeschool yet because my little one is too young, but we plan to. I know we aren't in close proximity, but I'm open to keeping in touch via whatsapp and voice chats etc about all things motherhood and otherwise if you'd like. Feel free to message me privately if you'd like 🙂

This sounds like she is struggling with envy. Maybe this silence is for the best and it's time to let go of a relationship that no longer serves you and your children. That kind of negativity is so dangerous to you and your children. Think of this as a natural conclusion to your relationship with her until/if she can recognize her mistakes and mistreatment of you and your children. I know its painful especially when it comes from family. I'm sorry she is choosing to be so selfish and unkind. ☹️

@Ashley it almost hurts worse knowing that She was my biggest cheerleader and it was all a lie. When I found out last summer it was a total shocker. Against my better judgment I chose to ignore it and forget what she said. I was hoping it was a one-off. I didn't want to believe that my biggest supporter was lying to me. Now that I know she is openly talking about us to others it hurts so bad. I'm not a confrontational person at all so I feel like I can't confront her about it. I'm also a bit of a homebody and I don't have a lot of friends. Maybe that's why she doesn't think I'd make a good homeschool mom? Despite me being shy the kids attend all their activities and play dates. I do get to see the same mom's every week and we get to socialize while the kids enjoy their activity and play together. The older they get the easier it is to form these acquaintances. But it's not the same as being at work every day and getting to mingle with other adults. That's actually why I joined peanut to talk to other moms.

Honestly, I would ask her directly. My son is only 4 and I haven’t “officially” started homeschooling, it’s been very “informal” but my whole family started asking if I was going to send him to school and what not and all of their responses have been the same, they said I was going to have an unsocialized child and I would cause problems for him, etc. He is one of the most social children I’ve seen (not all traditional school kids are social). He loves talking to people of all ages and has made both girl and boy friends from just parks and grocery trips. Like some of the ladies have said, just let her and whoever has something to say, watch. You would know better than anyone but I’m sure your kids are thriving!

I used to be in the same boat. Just cut her out of your life or greatly distance yourself. She's two-faced and extremely jealous, and nothing you say or do will change that.

@Marie ⭐️ I think that's what I'll have to do. I'll just be civil at family parties. Mainly for my parents sake. I'd rather be greatly distanced than have fake friendly conversations all the time with her.

@Yareli it's so wrong for people to assume and not be open to it. What confuses me the most about my sister is why she feels the need to express her extreme dislike for it to people. The girl at my work was only there for 5 days and she basically said my sister told her that I was going to be in work the next day and I'm only there once a month because I homeschool and she doesn't like it and thinks it's a bad idea for the kids. Then she asked the girl not to say anything to me. I got along really well with the girl and she flat out told me what my sister said 😅 the younger generation doesn't really believe in secrets.

@Ashley I was thinking about texting her once more because it's been actually over a month since we talked last. Then I found out about her speaking badly about my decision to homeschool. So it made me not want to contact her. Come to think of it even if we had a heart to heart she would still be talking badly to others about my chosen lifestyle. She doesn't have kids and doesn't have the patience to even babysit so I'm sure homeschool is ridiculous to her in general. I just don't see why she has to embarrass me like that.

@Mel to be honest with you, it really sounds like there is quite a bit of envy there on her part. And it makes sense that you wouldn't feel the desire to have the heart to heart as much now that you know she has been saying one thing to your face and complete opposite and negative things to others including people she doesn't even know well, that you also know. She's basically smearing you and your character without merit, or understanding of what homeschooling is. And on the homeschooling topic, the fairly young children I've met that are homeschooled have been quite gregarious and precocious which is something I think those of a different mindset just don't realize is often the case. There are such misconceptions of homeschooling. I already anticipate my parents giving me an ear full of comments regarding socialization once they find out we plan to homeschool!

That sounds like what I went through. She kept looking at my sister as family, and all she did was look at me like competition. She is super jealous and envious of me, and all that does is lead to hate. She has severe karma in her life. I found it's best to just cut these types out of your life, and if you can't, then greatly distance yourself.

@Marie ⭐️ it makes matters worse because she's been ignoring me for all these weeks with no real reason and then I find out she's been saying all this stuff all along. So I don't even know what her initial issue is but because she's 16 years older it sort of feels like abandonment. I've always looks at her as a mother figure. So it's shocking to see her put me down behind my backs and stop talking to me.

@Mel she's doing it on purpose to get a rise out of you. Sounds like the case of the fake people and high jealousy. There's no help for them. But they'll get their karma, believe that.