in England
Ranting
So husband works from home but I take care of daughter(11 months). Trying to sleep train, she has a nap schedule and meal times decided which I know I have to follow to the T. Weekend rolls me, husband is upset with me because I did not leave her breakfast prep to enjoy coffee with him. Sulked for the whole day. I asked him to go do his thing for a while and maybe feel better. He refuses saying ‘he’ll look like a bad dad’ I was not joking. I am used to taking care of her. He loves her but never has the patience to be with her all day long
Tried to talk to him in the evening. Explained why one tiny delay in a feed can potentially change everything and affect night sleep. Still was adamant that “her meals can wait”
I come from a broken family and being a good mom is my biggest wish in life. He thinks I am only being a decent mom to prove things!
I realised convo isn’t going anywhere constructive, get up and cooked for him. Tidied up the kitchen.
He says, “there is hardly any salt, why cook if you didn’t want to do it from your heart” WTF!!! After doing everything for my baby and then cooking and cleaning how dare he say that?!!
He really was never an arse. Don’t know what’s brought this on. Just angry tonight! 😡
It sounds like he might be feeling vulnerable and left out (not saying directing it at you is in anyway the right way to handle or show that). Even working from home, he may feel frustrated that he can't be involved as he would like to be. He may even be jealous that you are able to build and experience that connection with your daughter to understand her needs. Since he didn't want to do his own thing, maybe including or offering to allow him time either as a family or on his own with her so he can have that experience too, might give him some comfort and reassurance. Probably a conversation around how to express feelings and needs once everyone has collected their thoughts so you can understand and reflect on how the interactions made you both feel ❤