Best Lubricant for Menopause Dryness: How to Choose

Menopause can be a trying time. Hot flashes, insomnia, dry skin... Add vaginal dryness, and things can get a whole lot less fun.

Wondering what you can do about it? We’re here to shed some light on the best lubricant for menopause dryness.

📝 In this article:

What is menopause dryness?

Menopause is when you haven’t had a period for 12 months. During menopause, the ovaries stop making eggs, and your levels of estrogen and progesterone decline. (Estrogen and progesterone are the hormones that regulate periods and help support pregnancy.) This typically happens somewhere between 40 and 58 years of age. [1,2,3]

One side effect of this drop in estrogen can be that vaginal mucosa — the vagina’s natural lube — becomes thinner and less slippery, and the vagina loses elasticity.

Menopause can also cause vaginal pH to rise, disrupting the healthy lactobacilli-dominant microbiome and leading to dryness, itching, and increased infection risk. [4]

Often, vaginal dryness makes sex uncomfortable or even painful. And the thing is, it’s really common. Studies have shown that the majority of postmenopausal women experience vaginal dryness. [5]

But just because your body’s changing, doesn’t mean sex can’t be as good as before. Or better. And that’s where the lube comes in (pun intended).

How can I lubricate my vagina after menopause?

You’ve got a few options here. We’ll take you through them in detail, but here’s an overview. The obvious one is typical vaginal lubricants, like good ol’ KY jelly.

There are also vaginal moisturizers, a low-dose vaginal estrogen cream, or an estrogen ring. [6]

Another option is medication that can be taken by mouth, or nightly vaginal suppositories which can help ease vaginal dryness.

Before we dive in, it’s important to remember that everyone’s experience of menopause is unique. What works for some might not work for others. You’ll need to experiment with different options to find what works best for you.

And of course, it’s best to discuss these options with your doctor, especially if you’ve had, or are at risk for, breast cancer. Because in such cases, using estrogen is not possible, and you’d have to discuss non-hormonal alternatives such as laser therapy or selective estrogen receptor modulators to improve lubrication.

The best lubricant for menopause dryness

The range of lubes is as vast as it’s ever been. Experts recommend that when choosing a menopause lubricant, it’s best to avoid glycerin, parabens, nonoxynol-9, propylene glycol, benzocaine, and chlorhexidine gluconate. [7]

Chlorhexidine kills lactobacilli, the good bacteria which helps maintain a healthy vagina. [8]

Also going for lubricants that are most ‘body similar’ or are pH balanced (around 3.5 to 4.5) to mimic the healthy vaginal environment, is recommended. This helps protect against irritation and infections. Lubricants with osmolality closer to that of natural vaginal fluid (generally less than 380 mOsm/kg) reduce risk of mucosal irritation and damage. [9]

Choosing fragrance-free and hypoallergenic products further reduces irritation risk.

When we’re talking lubricants for sex, then you’ve got loads of options, each with its own pros and cons. Let’s take a look.

Water-based lubricants

This type of lubricant doesn’t damage latex condoms. It’s also less likely to cause vaginal irritation.

Water-based lubes wash off easily — from your body, from sex toys, and the bed sheets — so no staining. They’re also easy to find in stores.

But water-based lubricants dry up quickly, which may mean reapplying during sex. And because they’re water-soluble, you can’t use this type of lube in water. So not so useful for sex in the shower or pool.

Also, the preservatives and additives in some water-based lubricants may cause irritation and even yeast infections.

Some brands to try:

• Astroglide
• K-Y Liquid
• Replens
• Slippery Stuff
• Ultra Glide

Oil-based lubricants

Oil-based lubricants last longer than water-based ones. They also work in water, so they’re great for sex in the shower or pool. They also don’t usually contain preservatives and other additives, which may cause irritation.

The cons? You can’t use oil-based lubes with latex condoms because they can damage the latex. (Remember, it’s still possible to get pregnant in perimenopause, and you can get STDs at any time of life, even post-menopause.)

You can use oil-based lubes with polyurethane condoms. Some oil-based lubricants can increase your risk of a urinary tract infection. [10]

And, annoyingly, oil-based lubes can stain sheets and underwear.

Some oil-based options:

• Baby oil
• Petroleum jelly
• Mineral oil

Silicone-based lubricants

Silicone-based lubes offer the most lubrication. Like oil-based lubes, these ones don’t dry out during sex, and they work just as well in water. They’re also compatible with most condoms and sex toys (the non porous, non silicone kind). They also don’t damage latex condoms and are less likely to cause irritation.

Sounds perfect, right?

Well, the cons of silicone-based lubricants are that they’re expensive and not as easy to find. They can also be tricky to wash off and may leave your skin a little sticky. And they shouldn’t be used with silicone sex toys, since they leave a sticky residue.

If you do get silicone lube somewhere you don’t want it, you can cleanse with mild soap and warm water to effectively break down and remove silicone residue, reducing the risk of irritation or buildup that could promote infections.

Some brands:

• Astroglide Diamond Silicone Gel
• ID Millennium Lubricant
• Pink Intimate Lubricants
• Pjur
• Wet Platinum Premium Body Glide

Natural lubricants

If you prefer to avoid certain ingredients in your lube — like parabens or glycerin — you have several good options. But be aware: Even with “natural” lubes, you still have to be aware of the ingredients.

Natural oil-based products can damage latex, and water-based lubes will dry up quickly.

Some brands:

• Good Clean Love
• Isabel Fay Natural Water-Based Lubricant
• Organic Glide Natural Personal Lubricant
• Sliquid Organic Lubricating Gel

Plant oil-based lubricants

If you want to take the all-natural route to its full extent, then you don’t even have to go to the store. Generally, if something is safe to eat, it’s safe to use in your vagina.

But remember, even natural oils can damage latex and stain fabric. Specifically, oils may weaken latex condoms, raising the risk of breakage and reducing effectiveness in preventing sexually transmitted infections.

Some handy pantry options:

• Avocado oil
• Coconut oil
• Olive oil
• Crisco

The general rule of thumb? If you start to feel irritated or notice any signs of infection, it’s best to stop or opt for alternatives.

What can I use for vaginal dryness?

Lubricants are meant to be used temporarily during sex. If you are finding that vaginal dryness is an issue outside of sex, you’ve got some other options to consider.

Vaginal moisturizers can help relieve dryness. You can get these as gels, creams, suppositories, or beads.

Some brands are:

• AH! Yes VM
• Bonafide Revaree
• Carlson Key-E
• Luvena
• K-Y Liquibeads
• Replens
• Satin by Sliquid

What is the best lubricant for menopausal dryness?

So, what’s the best lube for vaginal dryness? It’s a bit like asking what’s the best face moisturizer. The answer depends on you.

For some, water-based is best. Others might prefer silicon-based. If you’re looking for an all-natural route, then perhaps coconut oil is your lube of choice. With a little experimenting, you can find the lube that best suits you.

During menopause, lube can be your best friend. And if you want to chat with other women in this life phase, connect with the Peanut menopause community. No topic is off-limits!