Fresh material for your little stand-up with the best funny jokes for kids. From math kids’ jokes, science kids’ jokes, animal jokes for kids, and so many more! Kids’ jokes for everyone!
Okay, so kids are already funny.
After all, original kids’ jokes — the ones they invent themselves — are the best.
You know the ones, with the nonsensical punchlines that have them belly-laughing so hard that you can’t help but join in.
They come from a place of pure innocence and imagination.
And those so-bad-they’re-good kids’ jokes are usually misquoted, misremembered jumbles of details they’ve heard before.
Whether it’s thanks to a joke from a grandparent, friends from daycare, or something they’ve watched on TV, your little comic won’t always nail the delivery, and that’s often part of the charm.
But, if we’re being honest, mama, there are only so many times you can giggle at “What do you call a tiger with glasses on? A scientist tiger!” (courtesy of @KidsWriteJokes) before you start to lose your mind.
So, to give your soon-to-be stand-up some fresh material, we’ve curated 151 jokes for kids.
From our math jokes to get their minds whirring to the best knock-knock jokes around, you’re bound to find something that tickles their funny bone — and yours, too.
Short and sweet, these are funny jokes for kids to tell one another, or for you to make them laugh and smile. Enjoy!
In this article: 📝
- Knock-knock jokes for kids
- Kids’ jokes about school
- Birthday jokes for kids
- Animal jokes for kids
- Pirate jokes for kids
- Disney jokes for kids
- Food jokes for kids
- Harry Potter jokes for kids
Knock-knock jokes for kids
You can’t beat a classic knock-knock joke for kids.
With their simple setup and clever punchlines, these easy-to-remember jokes for kids are sure to have your little ones howling with laughter.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? A little old lady. A little old lady who? Hey, I didn’t know you could yodel!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Owls say. Owls say who? Yes, they do.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, cows go moo.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Figs. Figs who? Figs the doorbell, it’s broken.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Woo. Woo who? Glad you’re excited to see me!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Nana. Nana who? Nana your business.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Europe. Europe who? Hey, that’s not nice!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Spell. Spell who? If you insist… W. H. O.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Cash. Cash who? No thanks, I prefer peanuts.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh… MOOOOOO!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Nobel. Nobel who? No bell, that’s why I knocked.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Theodore. Theodore who? Theodore is stuck and I can’t get it open.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Police. Police who? Police let me in, it’s freezing out here.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Iran. Iran who? Iran here and now I’m tired.
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Armageddon. Armageddon who? Armageddon a little bored of all these knock-knock jokes.
Kids’ jokes about school
If your little scholar has started school or kindergarten, they’ll love these jokes for kids about school to tell all their schoolmates:
- Why was the broom late for school?
It over swept.
- Why did the firefly get the best grades in school?
Because he was so bright.
- Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because his students were so bright.
- What happened when the teacher tied all the kids’ shoelaces together?
They had a class trip!
- Why did the boy eat his homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
- Why doesn’t the sun go to college?
Because it has a million degrees!
- Why did the students study on the airplane?
Because they wanted higher grades.
- Why is 2+2=5 like your left foot?
It’s not right.
Science jokes for kids
Let’s get scientific with these fun science jokes for kids to get them giggling like a geek:
- What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between you and me, something smells.
- Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?
Because he had no body to go with.
- How do scientists freshen their breath?
- What has a bed you can’t sleep in?
- What runs faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch a cold.
- What type of tree can you fit right in your hand?
A palm tree.
- How do you cut the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
- Why did the computer get glasses?
To improve its websight.
- Can you jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Of course, you can! The Empire State Building can’t jump.
- Why did the computer cross the road?
To get a byte to eat.
Space jokes for kids
If your little astronaut has their sights set on the moon, they’ll love these space jokes for kids:
- How do you throw a party on Mars?
- What’s an astronaut’s favorite key on a computer?
The space bar.
- Why don’t aliens eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
- Why did the astronaut stay in the space station?
Because the moon was full.
- What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon.
- How did the astronaut serve dinner in space?
On flying saucers.
Math jokes for kids
Got a mathematician on your hands? Then enjoy a math laugh with these math jokes for kids:
- Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine.
- Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
- Which snakes are good at math?
- How do you make seven an even number?
Remove the S.
- Which monster is good at math?
- What are ten things you can always count on?
- Why did the student do multiplication problems on the floor?
The teacher told him not to use tables.
- What did the triangle say to the circle?
- What tools do you need for math?
- What did the calculator say to the other calculator?
“You can count on me!”
- What is a math teacher’s favorite dessert?
Music jokes for kids
Record your very own laugh track with these music jokes for kids:
- What musical instrument do you find in the bathroom?
A tuba toothpaste.
- Why did the girl climb a ladder to sing?
Because she wanted to reach the high notes.
- Why couldn’t the athlete listen to her music?
Because she broke the record.
- What sort of music do frogs like?
- What are balloons’ favorite type of music?
- Why was the voice teacher so good at baseball?
Because she had the perfect pitch.
Birthday jokes for kids
- What do you say to a rabbit on its birthday?
- What did the cake say to the fork?
You wanna piece of me?
- What is a tornado’s favorite party game?
- What goes up but never comes down?
- What do cakes and baseball teams have in common?
They both need a good batter.
- Why did the girl put her cake in the freezer?
She wanted to ice it.
- What’s something you always get on your birthday?
One year older.
Animal jokes for kids
If you’ve got a mini zoologist to entertain, they’ll love these roar-some animal jokes for kids:
- Why does a seagull fly over the sea?
Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a bagel (bay-gull).
- How do cats bake cake?
- What do you call a pig that knows karate?
- What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye-deer (no idea).
- Where is a bunny’s favorite place to eat?
- Where did the kittens go for their field trip?
- What did the frog order at the restaurant?
French flies and Diet Croak.
- Why did the elephant paint himself different colors?
So he could hide in the crayon box!
- Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
- What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
- Which side of a turkey has the most feathers?
- Why couldn’t the pony sing in the choir?
Because she was a little horse.
- What animal is always playing baseball?
- Why did the turkey cross the road?
To show everyone he wasn’t a chicken.
- How did the bee get to school on time?
It took the school buzz.
- Why do hummingbirds hum?
Because they don’t know the words
- Why don’t lions like fast food?
Because it’s harder to catch.
- Which bird is always out of breath?
- Why was the bee’s hair sticky?
He used a honeycomb.
Dinosaur jokes for kids
If your little dino is a promising paleontologist, these dinosaur jokes for kids will tickle their funnybone:
- What do you call a dinosaur having a nap?
- Where do dinosaurs go shopping?
- What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?
- What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
- Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl when it goes to the toilet?
Because the pee is silent!
- What does a triceratops sit on?
Cow jokes for kids
Who knew, the things that go “moo” in a zoo would make laughter ensue?
Enjoy these a-moo-sing cow jokes for kids:
- Where do cows go with their friends on the weekend?
- Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
- Where do milkshakes come from?
- Why do cows have hooves?
Because they lactose (lack-toes).
- How do farmers count their cows?
They use a cow-culator.
- What do cows play at parties?
- Why did the cow jump over the moon?
To get to the Milky Way.
Dog jokes for kids
These barking-mad dog jokes for kids will have you and your little one howling:
- What do you call a dog magician?
- What do you call a great dog detective?
- Why did the snowman name his dog Frost?
Because Frost bites.
- What dog can tell the time?
- What’s a dog’s favorite dessert?
- Where does a dog sleep when they go camping?
A pup-up tent.
- When it’s raining cats and dogs, what do you risk stepping in?
Fish jokes for kids
These funny fish jokes for kids are off-the-hook!
- Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools.
- What do you call a fish with no eyes?
- Why don’t fish like basketball?
Because they’re afraid of the net.
- Why are fish so easy to weigh?
Because they have their own scales.
- What kind of fish only comes out at night?
- Why do sharks swim in saltwater?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
- How do you make an octopus laugh?
- How do shellfish get to the hospital?
In a clambulance.
- Why did the crab keep all the food to themselves?
Because it was shellfish.
- How do fish go to school?
Pirate jokes for kids
Give a swashbuckle chuckle as you peruse our side-splitting pirate jokes for kids:
- Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank?
Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.
- How much did the pirate pay for his peg and hook?
An arm and a leg.
- What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye matey (I’m 80).
- What did the ocean say to the pirate?
Nothing, it just waved.
- What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
The letter R.
- What’s the best name for a pirate dog?
- Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C.
Disney jokes for kids
Your mini mouseketeer will love these Disney jokes for kids all about the House of Mouse:
- Why can’t Elsa be trusted with a balloon?
Because she’ll “let it go” (Bonus points if you sing the punchline).
- Why is Peter Pan flying all the time?
- What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede?
Mufasa! (move faster)
- My knee hurts. Which knee?
Disney (this knee).
- What is Grumpy’s favorite fruit?
- Disney finally released Yoda’s last name. His full name is:
- Why is Cinderella so bad at soccer?
Because she runs away from the ball.
- What does Ariel like on her toast?
- Which Disney princess would make the best judge?
Snow White, because she’s the fairest of them all.
Food jokes for kids
Feeling peckish? We’ve got a buffet of food jokes for kids, from cheesy pizza jokes for kids to side-splitting banana jokes for kids.
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because he felt crummy.
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
- What do you give to a sick lemon?
- What does a skeleton say before he eats dinner?
- What are twins’ favorite fruit?
- What do you call cheese that is not yours?
- Why did the teddy bear refuse dessert?
Because he was stuffed.
- Why didn’t the orange win the race?
It ran out of juice.
- Why couldn’t the hamburger stop making jokes?
He was on a roll!
- Why did the banana go to the doctor?
I wasn’t peeling well.
- What do you call a fake noodle?
- Wanna hear a joke about pizza?
Never mind, it’s too cheesy.
- What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm.
Harry Potter jokes for kids
If your little witch or wizard is a Potterhead, they’ll love these hil-Harry-ous Harry Potter jokes for kids:
- What do you call a gardener with a beard?
- Where might you find Dumbledore’s Army?
Up his sleeve-y!
- What do you call a house-elf in a hotel?
Dobby in a lobby.
- Why couldn’t Harry find Hermione?
He was looking in all the Ron places.
- Why didn’t the professors like having Fred and George Weasley at Hogwarts?
They never knew which witch was which.
- Why did Snape cross the road twice?
He’s a double crosser!
- Why can’t Harry Potter tell the difference between his potions pot and his best friend?
They’re both cauldron (called Ron).
- How does Harry Potter enter a room?
Through the Gryffin-door.
- Why doesn’t Voldemort have glasses?
And finally, an oldie but a goodie:
- What is brown and sticky?
There you have it: over 150 funny jokes for kids.
Whether your little comedian is keen to host their own stand-up routine or you want to cheer them up with a silly kids’ joke, you’ll find your giggle here!
What’s your favorite kid’s joke? Share it with the mamas on Peanut!
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