How to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom: Tips & Benefits

By

Tassia O'Callaghan

Oct 18 2022

·

9 min read

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Being a stay-at-home mom may be the best thing for your family. Here are all the benefits, how to be a successful SAHM, and how to make it work financially. No matter if you have one, two, or many kids, being a stay-at-home mom might be the right choice for you and your family.

Creating a safe, loving environment provides a strong foundation for your child that will stay with them their whole lives.

Whether you're already a stay-at-home mom or are considering becoming one, there are plenty of benefits to know about.

Ultimately, becoming a stay-at-home parent is a lot of work, but the payoff can be huge.

In this article: 📝

What is a stay-at-home mom called?

Is it more affordable to be a stay-at-home mom?

What do stay-at-home moms do all day?

What are the benefits of stay-at-home moms?

How to be a successful stay-at-home mom

What is a stay-at-home mom called?

Before we start, you might be wondering What is a SAHM?

The SAHM meaning is “stay-at-home mom”.

What is the percentage of stay-at-home moms?

The percentage of stay-at-home moms is approximately 20-25% and fluctuates from year to year.

Moms with children under 6 are more likely to stay home than moms with kids who are 6 and older.

Is it more affordable to be a stay-at-home mom?

Wondering about how much money you can make working vs as a stay-at-home mom?

Well, according to Salary.com, a stay-at-home mom salary is estimated to be around $162,581.

This is because the role includes a combination of positions such as teaching, executive housekeeper, dietician, photographer, psychologist, nurse staff, and event planner.

Overall, the true value that a stay-at-home mom provides to the family can be hard to measure and varies based on what you do and where you live.

But that doesn’t mean it’s more affordable ‒ while a stay-at-home mom is worth $162,581, unfortunately, it’s a job that doesn’t pay the bills.

However, with the rising cost of childcare in the US and UK, it often works out that childcare annually costs about the same as an annual salary.

Being a stay-at-home mom can make financial sense based on money saved from childcare costs, limited commuting, no work wardrobe, and no lunches out.

When it comes to choosing between being a working mom vs a stay-at-home mom, sometimes the finances are negligible.

With a solid budget, you can make being a stay-at-home mom a success for you and the whole family.

What do stay-at-home moms do all day?

A stay-at-home mom generally provides care for their children, including diaper changes, feeding, educational opportunities, and doctor appointments, and also cares for the home and family with laundry, grocery shopping, and cleaning.

Some stay-at-home moms also make part-time incomes, like freelancing, owning a small business, or consulting on the side.

A typical stay-at-home mom schedule can start from about 7:30 in the morning (sometimes earlier ‒ how kids can wake up that early without coffee is a mystery!) until about 8:30 at night.

What are the benefits of stay-at-home moms?

Before we get into the perks of being a stay-at-home mom, it’s important to remember that there are differences between working mom vs. stay-at-home mom, but there isn’t a clear winner.

The choice to stay home comes down to you and your unique family.

It also depends on the ages of your kids — some moms choose to be home when their kids are little, while others want to be more available during the middle school and high school years.

In general, there are some benefits to being a stay-at-home mom.

1. Make memories with your children

With the extra time with your kiddos, you can solidify memories like reading, playing, snuggling, and going on adventures.

You’ll never miss a moment, whether it’s their first steps, first word, or the first time having a friend over to run through the sprinkler.

2. Be available for your kids

Being there for your child means that they feel safe and supported — a key component to them forming healthy relationships in the future.

Whether they’re having a hard day or want to tell you a funny story, stay-at-home motherhood allows you to be 100% there for them.

3. Focus on milestones and values

By spending your days with your little ones, you can hone in on their educational and motor skill milestones, such as learning the alphabet, climbing at the park, or holding a crayon.

You’ll also be able to instill the family values that are important to you, whether it’s appreciating nature or helping others in the community.

4. Network with other parents

Many stay-at-home moms get together during the day for play dates, to share child care, or enjoy the zoo together.

While staying home, you can make these important community connections and have support on your parenthood journey.

5. Have a more relaxed schedule

When you don’t have to run off to daycare or do pickups, you’ll have a more laidback day-to-day routine.

You can head to the park, library, or pool anytime, and there will be shorter lines at the grocery store.

You’ll also be able to schedule doctor and dentist appointments with greater ease.

6. Find gratification

Spending time with your children and being present during their developing years can be very rewarding.

Seeing them learn how to ride a scooter or enjoying a nature walk can warm your heart and give you a sense of pride.

7. Decrease stress and aggression in your kids

Looking for benefits of stay-at-home mom statistics?

A study out of the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development showed that kids who spend a lot of time at daycare are more likely to experience stress and aggression, compared with children who stay-at-home.

How to be a successful stay-at-home mom

Being a stay-at-home mom has its challenges, just like any other job.

And, since we’re all different ‒ even our children ‒ there’s no one way to be a successful stay-at-home mom.

Successful parenting looks different to each parent and each child.

But we asked our Peanut community for their top tips for stay-at-home moms, from building a supportive network to setting a routine for your family.

Take what works for you and leave whatever doesn’t ‒ you do you, mama.

1. Balance the workload

Stay-at-home motherhood doesn’t mean you have to do all the cooking, cleaning, and child-related chores.

If you're in a partnership, divvy up the roles of each parent so it feels balanced.

Even if one person is providing most of the income, it doesn’t mean they are off the hook for house and child duties.

2. Build a supportive network:

Having emotional and physical support as a stay-at-home mom is vital, and reaps lots of rewards.

Whether it’s one morning a week playing at grandma’s house or heading to the park with your mom friends, having adult support allows you to feel connected — improving your mental and emotional wellbeing.

And if you find it tough to make new mom friends, you’ve moved to an area, or you’re after friends who are in a similar life stage to you, why not join Peanut?

We’re sure you’ll find your community here, mama.

3. Lower your expectations:

You may have dreams of prepping dinner, having a pristine house, and taking your kids on educational adventures all on the same day, but you can’t do it all — and shouldn’t.

And even if you can, it might eventually cause you to feel burnt out.

Maintain a healthy workload that doesn't leave you feeling like you’re running on steam.

Remember, you are just one person — and sometimes, a very sleep-deprived person.

4. Establish a routine that works for you

A solid daily or weekly schedule is great for kids because it helps them feel secure and know what to expect.

It also can help you plan your days and ensure everyone is hitting nap times and getting lunch before they become hangry.

Find a schedule that works for you and your little ones, and adjust it as they reach different milestones and ages.

While veering from your routine every now and then can be healthy, a foundational schedule can help you and your kids embrace the day while ensuring basic needs are met.

5. Make healthy choices:

Eating nutritional meals and getting exercise each day helps both you and your kids to feel energized.

Stock the house with healthy snacks and meal options so everyone can be operating at their best.

Ensure you aren’t staying up too late or build a nap into your schedule if you can.

When mom feels good, it makes a big impact on the whole family.

6. Encourage independent play

You’ll run yourself ragged if you’re always entertaining your children.

Help them learn to play on their own, whether it’s piecing together puzzles, flipping through picture books, or sending their cars down the track.

While your kiddos play by themselves, you can either catch up on chores or sit down and put your feet up with a cup of coffee.

7. Carve out time for you and your pursuits:

Just because you’re at home all the time with the kids doesn't mean you don’t deserve — and need — time for you and your interests.

Whether it’s reading novels, exercising, or running a side business, dedicated time allows you to feel fulfilled, get alone time, or even interact with other adults.

Your self-care is important too.

Being a stay-at-home mom can be a beautiful option, and one that fosters countless memories and a strong connection with your children.

Remember that a supportive network is vital.

After all, it takes a village, right?

Connect with other moms in your area on Peanut, and enjoy play dates, hikes, group chats, or morning catch-ups over coffee.

We know you’ll fit right in.

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Trending in the community

I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

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4

18

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

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24

Avoidant husband

I love my husband and he is a good man. We have some issues in our relationship however, as he has an avoidant attachment style (finds romance/intimacy/being emotional difficult). This comes from him having to be independent from a young age and having quite an abusive mother.
The issues in our relationship are mainly around a lack of sex and intimacy. I think the problem is that to feel turned on, I need to feel connected and wanted. My husband (being avoidant) will usually make jokes about being horny whereas I would want to have someone make me feel beautiful/sexy to get in the mood.
It sounds terrible but I've sometimes had dreams about exes that would make me feel this way, and the romance we had (eye contact, intensity, deep words). It makes me feel really guilty but I feel like i'm starved of that. My husband would like a lot more sex but I can't always force myself if I'm not feeling it.
We've spoken a bit about therapy but I know its often really expensive so we probably wouldn't be able to afford it. Do you have any suggestions please? I know that neither of us are wrong in what we want, just different but I'm scared about whether we can fix it or if we're doomed?

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12

Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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8

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

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12

Do you say "fruit" or "fruits"

Eg. I'm going to buy some ..........

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5

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