SEX ~ DRAMA ~ MARRIAGE & MORE

Maybe it’s because he’s hurt me so many times. We tried marriage counseling but he wouldn’t bring up things just to bring them up during arguments. Felt more like individual therapy (for him) anyways. Told him to get individual therapy and he quit after like 1 session because he “doesn’t have the time.” I can’t work without losing childcare so I can’t afford a divorce until the kids are in school. Guess this is just a rant to see if I’m the only one who feels this way

My husband has an issue with me wearing sexy undies to work. Yesterday, I wore a thong for the first time in years because I'm just tired of my panty line showing 🙃 and oh my gosh he was very unhappy. He says that if he's not happy about it then I wouldn't do it. I should wear it at home. He says things like " men can tell I'm wearing a thong. " I don't respect him because I wear it to work, and he does not like etc. I just can't believe that it bothers him so much. I told him if I feel the need to wear it outside the house I will. It's not every time I want my panty line showing. I literally have less than 4 thongs, and only one Yesterday in years. No one sees under my clothes, so what's the issue. Please give me some advice on this? Who's wrong in this situation?

My husband has a gambling problem and it’s out of control.. he’s not paying bills on time, not paying bills to his ex for their daughter, I’m having to juggle stuff to pay our mortgage etc and he’s just not seeing the problem.. I’ve tried so many approaches being really kind and saying it’s an illness I will help him, come to groups with him, if he’s underlying depressed help him with that, I’ve tried the cold hearted approach of you are not supporting your family / the roof over our head what are you playing at .. it’s just not getting through. I just don’t know what to do… I’ve spoken to his mum briefly do I speak to his parents in the hope they will get through to him, do I speak to a friend of his to see if he can make him see sense I just don’t know what to do. I desperately don’t want to leave .. we have a 3 year old, and a baby on the way and he is a good person but is stuck in this head space where I don’t feel like I know him or how to help and fix it at this point….

So in my relationship for about 6 years now lots of ups and downs and not looking for divorce just curious if all men are like this or just mine his love language is sex not physical affection just like sex yk and I’ve had a rough relationship with sex and he knows I have problems when it comes to arguing just consistently pushing will get me to agree cause I’m over it and just always asking for it but wants me to surprise him with sex or saying the main reason he does stuff for me is to increase the chances of sex or when I say no I’m not feeling well I have a chronic illness and I’m 7 months pregnant and he thought he would get laid more cause I said maybe I would have a higher libido but he takes it as a promise I’m just venting at this point but that’s how it’s been and says he regrets another kid because of my low libido and mostly married me when I had a higher one and it makes me not want any more kids with him and makes me feel really depressed is all men like this

Can someone please give me some advice on what to do - wrote I get started I am pregnant and already very stressed out I don’t want anyone telling me I’m being love bombed ,

I met my bf In January 2025 , I had just turned 23 and he 25, in the April he took me to Portugal and asked me to marry him , we got on like a house on fire and he treated me like the most beautiful girl in the world , so I said yes , I had always lived with my mom and dad but when we got back from holiday we moved in together in the same town I already lived In , we argued a few times but it never got violent or out of hand just regular couple problems you know , it’s worth mentioning that he is from Brazil , he came to the uk in 2018 with absolutely no family bar a cousin who was born here and lived around 2 hours away , he was raised by his grandmother who is now in her late 70s and he has not been back home since 2022, to be fair he has always made me aware that some day he will be going back to live in Brazil .

Anyway fast forward to now we have moved to Manchester, in this time frame I’ve quit three different jobs , misscarried , got pregnant again , planned a wedding , had to cancel it , been away from my mum and dad longer than I ever have before , I knew I always wanted a baby but he had previously told me that due to some issues with his hormones he would likely never give me children , and honestly being so young it didn’t bother me as I was happy to take our time and see what the future held , if that ment trying ivf or adopting I would be open when the time was right .

After changing medication in November the doctor advised him that after consistent use of this drug that the possibility of him being able to give me a child would be higher but would take around 5-10 years , you can imagine my shock on Boxing Day I found out we got pregnant, I was scared but it felt right , on my birthday this year I lost the baby , it happened so quick I couldn’t process it , and between getting engaged, moving , changing jobs and now this I was starting to become very stressed out and depressed ; by some miracle I got pregnant again not even three weeks later , I’m now 34 weeks and everything is looking good , I quit my job again in July as my mental heath was just very poor , my employers knew about my misscarried and I made then aware that I was extremely anxious around this pregnancy and they didn’t really help me much so I quit for my sanity ,

Now my partner has decided that in April we are going to Brazil for a year with our baby as a way to get us both used to it for when we move their indefinitely, I know this is something we both need to agree on but I’m so scared to say I don’t want to go , he told me from the jump that is what he wanted but I honestly have no friends anymore , my only real support system is my mum who I call almost everyday , I don’t see her that often as she is around two hours away but I know if I need her she would be there for me , I’m scared because I can speak Portuguese but not very well at all and where he is planning on moving back to is not a tourist part of Brazil and nobody in his family can speak any English at all (fair enough) but I’m just worried that another big life change will send me over the edge , I’m scared to move away from my family with my new baby to a country I’ve never been to before , the time difference is too big to call my mum like I can now , and even though she said she is excited for me to go I can tell she is heart broken that she will not see her grandson for a whole year after he is 6 months , and to be honest my mum and dad are both over 65 I wanted them to experience as much of his life as possible and now I’m said because when we plan to come back he will almost be two years old .

I don’t know what to do because I know if I speak up and tell him how I feel he will be heartbroken as he wants to see his family and I do think it’s important and our son learns his culture and meets his other family as well , from the broken conversations I’ve had with his family they seem extremely kind and loving and caring just like my husband but a part of me is so scared and I’m worried if I go my feeling of isolation will only grow and potentially turn into something worse .