Community Posts, Tips & Support on Mental Health

Honest, unfiltered, and in real-time: what women like you are talking about. Peanut group chats, support, and posts on Mental Health

Lonely mum

Hi 👋
Feeling lonely at the moment, I’m a single mum with a lot of drama from my ex. Don’t really feel like I have anyone to talk to, going through loads of shit and just want some friends that being piece and fun ❤️
I’m in Northampton x

Stressed out momma

So I’m a mom of two boys ones 7 the others 2 months, lastnight I had a seizure 😅 I’m exhausted and stressed and feel like I’m losing my mind I just feel like I need some friends that won’t mind if i rant to cry to laugh with ♥️♥️

What do you do when someone trauma dumps?

I’m specifically talking about people you haven’t met yet online or people who you’ve just met.

I’ve had people dump baby daddy drama, childhood abuse, domestic violence issues etc.

I’m very lucky to have never experienced this level of abuse or trauma but I find it very off putting when people I barely know dump this on me. can we at least get coffee and small talk for a bit first ? 😬

How often do you see parents after having baby

Hi everyone how often do you see your mum/dad for help with your baby whether it’s them coming to you or you going to theirs. I feel like I’m constantly wanting to be around my mum for emotional support and so that I’m not lonely I currently have an almost 4 month old but my mum said she will only come and visit me once a week now and I’m finding that hard! She lives an hour away from me. Maybe I’m just not dealing with things very well.

Support

Interested to know people's opinions.

When it comes to mothethood journey, do you think it makes a difference as to whether you have alot of support from family and friends.. or to whether you have none?

So what I'm saying is do you think its more enjoyable if you have more support?

Have you ever donated blood?

Do you donate blood? Yes or no? And why?
I try and donate as often as I can, which realistically isn't that often. Pregnancy and post partum, travel restrictions, illnesses etc but when I can do it I always feel good after. It's my way of giving back that doesn't take very long and is free!

Feeling lonely/isolated

Is anyone else feeling a little lonely/isolated? I’m 17 weeks and a few friends have stopped talking to me since they found out I was pregnant, and the few that still do I only hear from every few weeks. I’ve been unwell past few weeks so haven’t minded staying quiet but do wish I had more people to talk to occasionally or just a few more summer plans.

25, no friends, no family, alone raising my 18 month old.

Moved country, left a DV relationship at the end of my pregnancy. No family around me, no friends. Just me and my baby.
It’s so lonely, I don’t know how we’re meant to make friends.
I go baby groups, play cafes. Everyday 24 hours a day it’s just me and my girl. I try engage with others but it’s always just a smile and moved on,
I don’t want to date. I’d have no time to date 😂no baby sitters. Can’t even take a sh*t without her hanging off of me🥲
I try make a laugh out of it but genuinely it’s so draining , and I don’t mean being a mum is draining, I mean having no one, no adult convos. No one to meet up with the kids.
I feel like I’m so lost, before my daughter I was so full of life , friends family around me. Met her dad and he ruined me completely I guess I should have seen the red flags him being 10 years older then me… but at the time love bombing was real and I could 100% fix him, I could not, I got broken in the process. Don’t even know why I’m writing this, to vent maybe. To see if anyone feels the same, to start a bond with someone?

New job anxiety

So I start my new job tomorrow and I am full of anxiety, so much so, that it can cause a full panic attack.
I struggle with change and there's loads of changes happening over the next few weeks. I am also anxious as I will be working with kids again
If anyone can give me some words of encouragement, that may help because right now, I want to call them and say thanks for the opportunity but no thanks 😩

Feeling lonely/friendships changing

Does anybody feel as if some of their friendships have changed since having a baby? I’m finding even this with the ones who have had baby’s recently too. We are so busy with our own we just don’t have time to see each other/speak to each other. I also feel some friendships have faded as they haven’t really checked in much and we’re on different pages now. I’d like to make new friends but I also feel my confidence is totally shot and I’m exhausted most of the time. I’m normally quite sociable and outgoing so this all feels a bit alien to me.

Anyone else find child free weekend so strange feeling especially as a young parent??

When my child is not here, I'm not a young mum trying to heal everything, help my son grow and break toxic cycles I am infact just a 21 year old girl.... it's a strange feeling when most of your identity is being a parent to realise you haven't actually found yourself at all. Do any other young mum's feel the same? Like sometimes I think, who am I and when will I finally find myself?

After reading this I've realised maybe I should become a poet 😆

Consistency/loneliness

You know I’ve always typically been a lonely person since I was a child but being pregnant and in your 30s is the loneliest thing I can’t find consistency in my life at all, and I feel like I can’t keep a consistent friend to save my life. And maybe it’s because of all the shit that I’ve gone through and I don’t tolerate a lot of things, but man, I am feeling guilty for being pregnant and having a child when I feel the loneliest I’ve ever felt in my life. Am I the only one?

How am I ever supposed to do this alone?

Im so sick and tired of being alone. I actually started crying while I was supposed to be enjoying time with my husband and kids because of how lonely I feel.
I found out today everyone on my mom's side of the family was up doing a memorial service for my maternal grandparents and all spending time at the family camp i haven't been to in at least 8 years. No one bothered to tell me, no one bothered to invite me.. but my supposedly best friend was invited.. but not me..
Then at the festival I was at today, I was looking around seeing mom friends meeting up, hugging while their husbands shook hands, their kids played, and they were talking catching up. And i was standing alone with my baby while my husband was in line with our kids. That's when I started fighting back tears.
It hit me like a brick how fucking lonely I am. Ive tried reaching out so many times for so many years and get blown off, ghosted, and filled with false promises of future hangouts. The worst part is, both of our families live within 30 minutes of us. I have been raising our kids by myself while my husband is working for over 5 years now. No calls, no texts, no one checking in, no one asking to visit me or the kids. Family only want to be around when my husband is here.. whats so fucking wrong with me that everyone would rather act like I dont exist..? Why do my kids also have to pay the price for that.. they always ask about seeing people, but i dont know what to say to them because everyone is always "too busy". Why does no one give a literal fuck about me? The deep hatred and resentment I have built towards absolutely everyone around me is insane.
I just want some resemblance of a village.. friends and family who want to be around me and my kids.. i want to stop feeling like we're too much so theyd rather not have us around.. i get 3 boys can be a lot, but like.. i dont know.
I just dont want to feel so fucking alone anymore. Im always in such a bad mood, im constantly overwhelmed, I feel like i need a break because im constantly taking care of my kids 24/7, i feel like im failing them because I barely have the patience most days to be the mom they deserve. I hate this. I hate everyone.

Comparison

I’m not sure if anyone feels the same but I feel since having my baby I’m constantly comparing my life to others around me. I wasn’t like this pre-baby but it feels like everyone’s buying nice things, going on fancy holidays with their babies and having a great time whilst I feel quite stuck at home. Maybe it’s the constant social media posts I see, but it just feels like everyone’s having a better time than me.

I know social media is just what people want to show you, but since having my baby I just feel I’m constantly comparing.

Sleep deprivation and hormones

Hi,

I am a first time mom of my little girl Sofia. I love her so much but I have to admit it is sometimes a bit difficult emotionnaly..

I feel so much happiness when I look at her and do everything for her but I kind of lost myself in the process..

It's a bit difficult to be vulnerable but just wanted to see if anyone else does or did feel the same ?

Have a nice day!
Lola

Who else is mentally checked out?

Tell us the reasons why you’re mentally checked out and what you wish he would do to change.

Kids are gone and I miss them

I can't believe I'm even writing this. I am a stay at home mom to 4 kids ages 1,5,8,9 and my mother in law has all 4 of the kiddos and they are staying the night and my husband drives trucks so he's on the road. I haven't had a break like this in almost a year I should be excited right? Yet I have these feeling in my chest like I miss my kids 🥺 I just want to drink my wine eat my turkey sandwich and watch love Island with no care in the world but this feeling is heavy. What should I do? I just got out of the shower thought that might help but nope

Feeling alone and sad

I think I need a mom friend someone who I can be there for and vise versa I just had my second baby 2 weeks ago and we have an almost 6 year old evreything feels heavy and lonely my husband is always entertaing other women on and off the past 15 years we've been together he talks bad about me to anyone who will listen and he loves to say "happy wife , suicidal husband " and honestly I'm just like why does he stay if he's so miserable you know . I just need a friend I believe on quality or quantity

I don’t want to look after my kids anymore…

They’re 2.5 and 3.5 and I’m just done with the running around, playing with them / entertaining them constantly as soon as they wake up to when they sleep.

I feel like I’m just bored of them now. Does anyone else feel the same?

Obviously I love them

Graduation with no one to support

Honestly, it’s really sad to me that I don’t have anyone around that is willing to celebrate me and my hard work from family to friends. I mean like no friends whatsoever. They always end up hating on me and being extremely jealous. Even my own parents. Like my mom the other day just once again revealed how jealous she was of me. I was asking for advice and she completely just started talking abiut her and high key ignored her and did what she does to me. Then she just started talking bad stuff to me an saying I don’t have 40 inch hair or a mani pedi just rubbish honestly. I’m well kept and I work hard for all I do and it’s just like damn. . . Together for a picture. I don’t even want them in my pictures or life because they just hate me anyways like wtf is this shit about man. This has me so sad rn.