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Perineal Massage

My midwife recommended I start perineal massage to help prevent tearing (I’m 36 weeks). This is something I was planning on doing anyway, so the other night I thought right, let’s give this a go! Sorry for the tmi, but absolutely impossible to get two thumbs in as per the diagram, around my massive bump. How on earth is anyone able to do this!? 😅 Tried the ol’ sitting on the loo trick, but there’s just no way. Any tips or tricks?
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Get your partner to do it for you

2 replies

☝🏻☝🏻

I cant have him help hell turn it into sex to quick when im at that point i use primrose oil to help

Haven't got to this stage yet but I'm fully planning on getting my husband to help, he got the baby in there so he can help get it out 😂

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😂😂😂 good point. I did think about this, but not suuuuper keen on it

May i ask why love? I had my fiancé do it.

Tried it myself and had the exact same issue 😂 it is surprisingly more uncomfortable than I thought too! Got my partner to help in the end.

3 replies

Omg it sooo much more uncomfortable than I thought too! And I also haven’t been super keen on having my partner help... How have you found it?

Failing that, one had a time sort of works but just incredibly awkward 🥴

Partner did mine! ❤️

Your partner needs to do it. Didn't tear after doing perineal massage; son was 9 lbs 14 oz.

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It was only in the weeks leading up to birth, just a few minutes each night, if that long (this was 15+ years ago, memory fades). My midwife explained to me that the idea is each session gets a little wider than the last, just do it until you feel burning, then stop. The next day you should stretch a bit more. So it's small increases leading up to birth, so that the skin and muscles stretch easily during birth. It's less massage and more stretching, but guess the latter is too graphic a name!

Baths whilst birthing helped me a lot. Hopeful thinking!

My husband did this for me as well. But I still ended up with a third degree tear for a 7lb baby

I used the KR curve and went from the back lol it worked! I didn’t tear at all and my babies head measured 13 inches

1 reply

Thanks for sharing this! Looks like KR Curve is available in the USA 🙂

The odds are 1 in 15 women who does the massage doesn’t end up tearing 🤷‍♀️ that’s abysmal

I had my fiancé do it, I did it everyday and I still ended up tearing.

It honestly only helps a small percentage. You have a greater chance of tearing anyway, than you do of a perineal massage actually preventing tearing.

Haha when the midwife mentioned this to me I was like.. erm really! There is no flipping way that’s happening! Hubby wouldn’t do it and it seems impossible to do it yourself 🤦🏼‍♀️ It amazes me how health advice has come on, especially since the war when mums just gave birth with no help whatsoever!

1 reply

Midwives, and a more holistic body of knowledge, have been around for millennia. PS - if you're just 'massaging' and not *stretching* you're doing it wrong and it won't help at all.

What oil do you use to do this? Sure I heard you should massage with coconut oil.

2 replies

I used olive oil, as it's what my midwives recommended. Never even knew what coconut oil was back then. Later was introduced when the kids had skin issues. If using coconut oil, I suspect you'll have to reapply additional amounts during the massage because of how coconut oil can be absorbed by skin, but I do think it'd help ya get the job done and is certainly one of the better choices to put on/in one's lady bits.

Weleda doan oil too https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/323959581814

Also important: if your partner is just massaging, it's not being done correctly. If this is the technique used in the studies, no wonder it has such an abysmal success rate. Per my midwives, it really should be thought of as perineal stretching, where your partner increases the stretch each day--which is why you start the process a few weeks out from baby's birth. Approached it that way; delivered a 9 lb 14 oz baby with no tearing.

I do it in the bath with one thumb, as you say, too tricky with bump in the way to do two at once 😂

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Genius! 🤣

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You can try the Aniball instead? Worked a treat, I didn’t tear with my 8lb 1oz bubba

3 replies

This looks like a great idea. Of course, they don't deliver to the USA. Have to see what I can track down...hrrrrm...

@Katelyn do you have a link to this? Its coming up as toys on google 😅

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