Community Posts, Tips & Support on Adoption, Fostering & Surrogacy

Honest, unfiltered, and in real-time: what women like you are talking about. Peanut group chats, support, and posts on Adoption, Fostering & Surrogacy

Eggs

Is it a good idea to give eggs in the first week or wait? As it’s an allergen

Hello! I am a 2 mum family with a little girl on the way! My partner is 38 weeks pregnant and I am so excited to meet her I am just nervous as she still doesn’t feel like mine. We done AI and found a donor and I was involved in the whole process but I think I am struggling with the idea of she doesn’t have any of my DNA. I was just wondering if there was any other mums out there who felt the same way? And how did you come to terms with it and was it easy to bond with baby when they was here?

I obviously know for a fact that she is my baby and I will always be her mum, I just always have in the back of my head that I am not biological to her and it upsets me and I want to over come that so I can be the best mum she needs 🫶🏻

Opinions?

How would feel/take it if your best friend told you that you remind her of why she doesn’t have/want kids?

Just need a hug

We are in the midst of IEP evaluations and I’m struggling. It’s so hard to know that other people don’t go through these with their kids.

I Have a question!!

Hii🫶🏽 I am a mother of a biracial son ( black & Mexican) and we’re getting to the point where he wants to connect with with his other roots, so I am curious on what steps should I take for him so we can get started!! 😊😊🫶🏽

9 eggs fertilised

For those with a similar number, how many made it to blastocyst stage? 🤞🏻

Assignment Help

Texas moms I have an assignment due this afternoon, and need to hear more different pov's and experiences. If you all would be lovely to share your input thank you. This is my questionnaire
1 What was the biggest adjustment you had to make when you became a mother at a young age?
2 How has becoming a mother changed your daily life, personal goals, and plans for the future?
3 How has becoming a mother affected your relationships with your family, friends, or the child's other parent? Mentally and emotionally
4 Was there partner involvment? how was their support?
5 What has been your experience trying to afford your child's needs, such as food, clothing, diapers, healthcare, and childcare?
6 What was the greatest form of support you relied on during your experience?
7 What challenges did you face trying to access/achieve that ssupport?
8 If you could, could you do things differently? If you had better support.
9 What obstacles have made it difficult for you to continue your education, find employment, or pursue your personal goals?
10 What do you wish schools, families, or the community understood better about the experiences and challenges of young mothers

Any advice please!

I’m white, and my fiancé is Black, so our son is mixed. With the world being the way it is, I worry about having the conversations with him someday about racism, police interactions, and how to keep himself safe. As his mom, one of my biggest fears is losing my son because of the color of his skin or an interaction with a police officer.

My fiancé doesn’t feel like it’s something we need to worry about right now and thinks our son will learn about racism as he gets older. I respect his perspective, and I don’t want to push him or act like I know what it’s like to experience racism as a Black man when I don’t. At the same time, I feel like these are important conversations that we need to be prepared to have with our son.

For other moms in interracial relationships or raising Black and mixed-race children, how have you approached these conversations? At what age did you start talking about racism and police interactions? Is this something I should leave primarily to his dad to teach him, or is it important for me to be involved in those conversations, too?

I want to protect my son, prepare him for the world without making him afraid of it, and make sure he always feels loved and supported. I would really appreciate hearing your experiences and advice. ❤️

Issues with controlling parents (grandparents of baby)

💕 Does anyone else feel like their family is taking away the excitement of their first pregnancy? 😔

I'm currently pregnant with our first baby, and what should be one of the most exciting and special times in our lives is starting to feel quite upsetting and stressful because of my parents.

Don't get me wrong, we are incredibly grateful for everything they have offered to buy for our baby and their willingness to help with childcare. However, it feels like every offer of help comes with conditions and an expectation that they get a say in everything.

They told people about our pregnancy before we'd even had the chance to announce it ourselves, which really hurt because that was OUR news to share.

We also explained that there are certain things we would really like to choose and purchase ourselves for our first baby. We even gave them a list of the things that were important to us, only to be met with the response, "Who do you think you are?"

It's beginning to feel like because they're offering financial help and future childcare, they believe they're entitled to make decisions, overstep boundaries and say whatever they like.

This is our first baby, something my partner and I have been so excited to experience together. We want to enjoy choosing things, making plans and experiencing all those special firsts as parents.

Instead, I feel like we're constantly having to defend ourselves and our decisions.

I love my parents, and I genuinely appreciate their generosity, but I don't believe accepting help should mean giving up our right to make decisions about our own child.

I'm also starting to worry about what things will be like once the baby actually arrives if they're already struggling to respect our wishes now.

I feel guilty for being upset because I know we're fortunate to have family willing to help, but at the same time, I feel like our experience of becoming first-time parents is slowly being taken away from us. 💔

Has anyone else experienced this with their parents or in-laws? How did you manage to set boundaries without causing a massive family fallout?

I just want us to be able to enjoy this special chapter of our lives. 🥹💕

Anyone collecting ?

Is anyone collecting colostrum ? 36+4 and this is what I have so far

52 ml ! Started 3 days ago

Why is it so hard to set boundaries as an adult?

I've realised it's really tough to start setting boundaries now that I'm an adult, especially when people are used to me always saying yes. Did anyone else struggle with guilt or worry about damaging relationships? How did you overcome the mental challenges and stick to your boundaries?

Donating Eggs

Has anyone had a experience with donating eggs? Should I go for it?

Pram

Hey everyone, I’m 25+2 today and our pram just arrived! We were going to hold off until about 30 weeks but the pram we wanted was on sale so we snatched it up! Has anyone else already got theirs😘

When are we unboxing everything?

Has anyone started to unbox things and put them together?

Pram/Car Seat/ Bottles etc

If not when are you planning to? I’m due Christmas Day and still working full time. I’m worried I’m going to be so busy in a few weeks time but also don’t want anything gathering dust. I’m also very type A so itching to get it all done and ticked off!

Egg retrieval

What cycle day did you have your egg retrieval? Thanks

Visitors after baby is born

I'm curious about people's experience with letting family and friends visit after giving birth. Since this is our first baby, my mom is wanting to be at the hospital and at our house immediately after baby is here. I had to tell her I want it to just be me and my husband, and that I want time to decide when we are ready for visitors after baby is born. My mom lives about 4.5 hours away, and even if they get a hotel, she will want to spend every minute with us while she is visiting. I told her I don't want to give her false expectations if I want more time than she wants to wait. At the same time, I understand it's the first grandchild and she wants to be a part of everything. I'm just a people pleaser and will struggle to rest with anyone at the house, especially out of town visitors. What did you do, if this is not your first baby? How much time did you feel was right to make family wait?

I will also add, our other family members and friends have not put any pressure or even asked about it. It is just my mom so far that is upset that I haven't given her the answer she wants.

Adoption

Be honest! Is it better to struggle with your baby and hope for a better life or surrender and give your baby the life they already deserve by finding another family??

Colostrum harvesting

I've just turned 37 weeks. Has anyone started collecting colostrum, if so, how are you finding it?

Safe loving placement needed

Hey mamas, I’m reaching out from the heart. My daughter is currently in DCS custody due to circumstances involving her alleged father, and I have serious concerns about abuse in her placement. Having grown up in foster care myself, I don’t have much of a support system to turn to.I’m fighting for my baby’s safety and future, and I’m asking if anyone would consider being a safe placement for her, if approved, or standing beside us through this process. Even guidance, resources, or support would mean so much.
No mother should have to fight alone, and no child should have to go without a safe, loving community. If you’re willing to help, please message me privately. ❤️🙏🏽

Any mom willing to be placement for my 4 yr old daughter

❤️ Hey mamas, I’m reaching out from the heart. My daughter is currently in DCS custody due to circumstances involving her alleged father, and I have serious concerns about abuse in her placement. Having grown up in foster care myself, I don’t have much of a support system to turn to.

I’m fighting for my baby’s safety and future, and I’m asking if anyone would consider being a safe placement for her, if approved, or standing beside us through this process. Even guidance, resources, or support would mean so much.

Hey mamas, I’m reaching out from the heart. My daughter is currently in DCS custody due to circumstances involving her alleged father, and I have serious concerns about abuse in her placement. Having grown up in foster care myself, I don’t have much of a support system to turn to.
No mother should have to fight alone, and no child should have to go without a safe, loving community. If you’re willing to help, please message me privately. ❤️🙏🏽