Am I a bad mom?

You are by no means a bad mom! You are doing the right thing by making sure your baby gets fed regardless of the method. I tried to breast feed but due to losing so much blood I couldn’t produce enough and I felt horrible about it but now my son is doing amazing and growing well so I’m glad how it turned out. You’re doing amazing!

It definitely doesn’t make you a bad mom at all. My baby struggled to latch on in the beginning so I had to exclusively pump for 2 months. I then introduced a nipple shield and she was able to breastfeed plus I felt no pain at all. After 6 weeks I was able to not use the nipple shield and breastfeed successfully with no pain. I would occasionally add some nipple cream but it wasn’t as painful as it was when I initially tried in the beginning. You could always try to breastfeed again but whether you pump or breastfeed, you’re still a great mom!

Not a bad mom in the slightest! I had the same experience trying to breastfeed—even pimping was super painful. I wasn’t producing very much, so I was trying to squeeze out something that wasn’t there. And I kept getting mastitis, so that suuuuper didn’t help. Fed is best when it comes to baby. She started supplementing with formula at two weeks and was almost exclusively formula fed at 2 months. So far she’s turned out fine, and it hasn’t kept us from bonding. Crying and yelling with pain while breastfeeding (which I did almost every time I fed her) doesn’t make a good experience for anyone.

Fed is best!! You're an AMAZING mom and you're doing your best for your baby and that's just what he/she needs! You need to be in a stable place mentally and I applaud you for doing what needs to be done to get there!! You're doing better than you think you are. ❤️❤️❤️

Your not a bad mom at all

No give yourself time! If pumping is a better option for you right now do it. My son was fed breastmilk in bottles for his first 3 months. Then I slowly started using a shield, and eventually we just went to breast. He nursed 4 years!

You are feeding your child. He is happy. You are happy. What a great mama!! 💕💕

You are by no means a bad mom. Breast or bottle, you are feeding your baby and making sure he’s fed. Don’t ever think or make anyone else make you think you’re a bad mom because of this. Stay strong mama!!

Not at all! You'd be a bad mom if you were starving your kid. You're making sure they are fed. A bottle isn't evil. Especially if it helps you! Your well being is just as important as babys! Hugs and good luck!

NO MAMA YOUR NOT A BAD MOM!!! The fact you went all natural shows me you looked into it enough to understand the health benefits for your baby bringing them into the world that way. I too did the same thing and also cried every time I fed, latch was bad and come to Find he had a lip and tongue tie we fixed it and took him to cryotherapy and found a lactation consultant after 2 months we finally got it and the crying stopped and he and I were feeding champs. Mama you need to do what is best for you and if that is pumping and feeding with bottle then do it if you want to see if baby has something wrong why it is making it hurt then look into it. And btw with my second it hurt for the first two weeks but after my nipples got raw it went smooth from there!! Mama you got this!!

You sound like a great mother feeding your baby whichever way is best for you and baby I can’t wait to try one of those nanobebe bottles they look so cool, woah 49 hrs of labor that’s amazing mama 💪🏽

I did both and my kids were happy and I still have that special bond with them. You are NO WAY a BAD MOM! You are doing GREAT and what’s best for you and your baby

I bottle and formula fed so I must be the worst

Definitely not a bad mom. Pumping takes such dedication and love. Have you gotten him evaluated for ties? Breastfeeding shouldn’t really be that painful. With my first, I had such terrible pain when feeding him and my nipples cracked and bled. Turns out he had a tongue and lip tie.

You are being a GOOD mom because you are listening to you are taking care of yourself and meeting yourself where you’re at. You need to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally to be able to take care of your baby. Keep doing the best that you can and reaching out for different types of support when it would be helpful... and that’s good enough. Your baby is still young. If you do want to work on making breastfeeding more comfortable and enjoyable for yourself at some point, there’s support out there for that. I am working with Lactation Consultant Freda Rosenfeld (http://www.fredaibclc.com/), and she is magical. Pricey, but one session includes unlimited ongoing support via email, and some insurances reimburse 60-80% for this out-of-network benefit. If you don’t want to work on this, that’s ok too! You can still nourish and bond with your baby in ways that are enjoyable for you and your baby! Good luck!!

So as everyone else has said, you are absolutely not a bad mom. I cried in pain for the first 6 weeks, it was horrible. I hated it and felt like I'd never see the light at the end of the tunnel. I finally enjoy it. I know my nipples constantly bled and scabbed, bled and scabbed. They just needed to toughen up. I can proudly say that the last few weeks have been a breeze. It no longer hurts, it's honestly relaxing. Everyone told me to just stick it out, and I'm so glad I did. Hang in there mama, it's tough but you've got this ❤

It took six months for the pain to dissipate enough for me to enjoy the experience. I’m so happy I kept pumping. You keep it up and try to put her on as much as you can handle.

Of course you’re not a bad mom. I exclusively express and give my baby in a bottle and I don’t see nothing wrong with it. Happy mom happy baby and most importantly it’s my milk so I’m peace that she is having all the benefits from breast milk. Whatever works for you will be fine.

Just because you aren't feeding him directly from your boob doesn't mean you won't bond :) ... Breastfeeding hurt me sooo badly I would bleed, but apparently the latch was perfect. I pressed on for 12 months and resented ever feed time, but wanted to do the "right thing" if you're feeling better now, I would take that as a sign of you're doing what's best 😊

You do what is best for you and you mental and physical help, as ling as your baby is fed you are brilliant. I know how you feel, breastfed my oldest till she was 9 months and now feed mu youngest and she refuses bottles so i have no choice and it is painful. Try nipple cream i may help you and massage and warm towels on the breast may also help. You are doing a great job, a fed baby is a happy baby no matter how it is done xxx

Fed is best! So whether you are breastfeeding, pumping, or formula feeding as long as your baby is being fed that is what is best. I have 3 kids, I attempted to breastfeed with all of them and I failed at doing so with all of them. I wasn’t producing enough for my first and she could not latch. It was so painful I knew mentally I couldn’t handle it and be the best mom I could be. All 3 of my kids are healthy happy kids and I felt a bond with everyone of them despite not breastfeeding. You do what is right for you

How you feed your baby has no impact on whether your a good mum. It's about what's comfortable for you. As long as baby gets fed that's the main thing

Youre a great mom because you tried! If its not for you then thats fine. It ist for everyone as long as he is healthy and cared for you are a great mother. My son got thrush at 3 months old and i caught it n dried up. 😔 our bf journey was cut short.

Use a nipple shield. My son is one week old today. For the first two days I cried when I fed him then I got that and since then I actually can feed him without crying.

no you’re not a bad mom. of course not

It definitely is challenging. I gave a high pain tolerance idk or I was just determined but the first month is tough but it will ease especially if her latch is good. Switch on and off with the breast and bottle. Either way you’ll be fine best of luck

I don’t think it’s a bad thing. Especially if he will take a bottle. I felt the same ways sometimes but my daughter never took a bottle.

Breastfeeding is really hard specially the first 3 weeks. It gets better mama! As for giving a bottle, that’s doesn’t make you a bad mom, your mental health is extremely important. Congratulations mama

Makes me so sad to think any mother feels guilt and shame for feeding their children in whatever way they choose- breast/bottle/formula. You do what you need to do to be relaxed and happy so that your child is relaxed and happy too. I have a 12 day old and breastfeeding was extremely hard to get going but we worked really hard and met with multiple lactation specialists to get it down. We're latched and feeding from the breast now but it definitely hurts and still needs work. Sometimes for some mothers it's the initial start that hurts until your body gets used to it. For others you need to train your baby not to bite, and yes some babies have tongue tie. It's SO physically and emotionally demanding to breastfeed especially when it hurts and/or your child doesn't latch easily or bites, etc. Breastfeeding is constant! We also do bottle one feed/day. Call CHOMP to schedule an appt or to ask questions to a lactation nurse over the phone!!

Please dont ever think you are a bad mon for giving your baby a bottle. I was in so much pain breast feeding I pumped and bottle fed. When she wasnt gaining weight i formula fed for an week until my milk came in fully. It doesn't matter how you feed your baby as long as they are being fed. I bottle fed for 3 weeks and decided that I wanted to try latching again. It took us a week but she was able to finally.get it and now I only pump when I need to leave her somewhere. You do what is best for you and your baby. No matter what you choose. 💜

Nobody prepares you for the hardship of breastfeeding. My first daughter it took a good 2 weeks for me to not cry through feedings but once your body gets used to it it gets a lot easier. Breast or Bottle it doesn't make you a bad mom. Fed is best!

You are a wonderful mom! We are so lucky to live in a time where we have options as to how we feed our babies, but having that choice often comes with guilt or fear that we will pick the “wrong” one. Your baby’s full tummy is ALL that matters. You are doing great, mama 💕

You’re not a bad mom! And enduring pain in breastfeeding is hard, especially after your long labour! But the pain gets better. It was excruciating for me at first too, so I sought help with a public health nurse who made me feel more confident and comfortable with positioning and latch, etc. I used Lansinoh lanolin ointment (it really really helps!), barely wore a shirt or bra, and by two weeks the pain was mostly gone.

I feel ya. My baby is a week old and today i had to give her formula. I broke down thinking im a crappy mom. Both my nipples are severly bruised. One from her and one from trying to pump with the incorrect flange size. Hoping all will be back to normal in the next day or so.

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I second this!

You’re an amazing mom for feeding your baby!! It doesn’t matter how you do it! Your feelings are totally valid, but know that you’re an amazing mother and always will be if you love and care for your baby!

You are not a bad mom fed is best you are doing what's best for you and your baby

I sobbed and sobbed when I first started breastfeeding. It. Hurt. So. Freaking. Bad. And now I pump and supplement with formula. I even nurse, though it still hurts. I know the guilt you feel all too well, but please go easy on yourself. Sending you love, mama. Hang in there. ❤

After giving birth your hormones are all over the place, emotions are running high and your body is trying to figure out what’s next. Breastfeeding can be very difficult and painful in the beginning but just like everything else the more you do it the better it gets. I have an 8 months old that I still breastfeed and it’s a breeze now, but we had our tough beginnings too, including cracked nipples, tong tie, emotional meltdowns, breastfeeding groups and reading any information I could find on the topic. Hang in there, I know it doesn’t feel like that now but I promise it doesn’t only get better it will be a really amazing experience! ❤️

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But if you physically and emotionally can’t handle breastfeeding, that’s ok, too! You’re an amazing mother no matter how your baby is fed!

A bad mom would be someone who does something that isn't right for her/her family bc she's living up to other people's expectations/judgement... It's easy to be a good mom. Just do your research, do what's best for you and your family, and don't ask for other people's judgement. Love yourself fiercely, love your family fiercely, and make the most out of life!

I pumped and bottle fed with my first. I was 22. Don’t feel bad! Your best is your best. Don’t let anyone pressure you or tell you otherwise!

You’re an AMAZING mother because you care so much!!! Don’t worry, I had the same problems. She had a tongue tie and lip tie and laryngomalacia and a small mouth. It made it nearly impossible to breastfeed. She just wasn’t getting enough milk and I was in horrible pain every time she fed, to the point of dreading every feeding. I then switched to pumping around 2 weeks because I couldn’t take it and my milk supply was low from a recent gallbladder surgery. Then my lactation specialist said I needed to supplement with formula, so I did. Hardest decision ever. I felt like the worst mom every time I gave her that bottle and would cry. I then stopped pumping because I wasn’t spending enough time with her during the day (to all the pumping mamas, i salute you!!) My perspective has since shifted and I am much wiser now (she is 3 months old). I now know that her being fed and full is the most important thing. Second most important thing is that I, as her mother, am happy and can love her to my fullest capacity.

Don’t feel bad about this! Breastfeeding isn’t easy and those first few weeks are exhausting and emotional! You need to do whats best for you- if that’s pumping and bottle feeding, then great! I will say that for me the first few weeks were very painful (my son had a tongue tie) once we got past it it was completely painless and I loved it! So if breastfeeding is ultimately what you want maybe take a few days off and give it a try again

Have you tried to see if they are tongue tied? Have a doctor check. I know when I was breast feeding that was the main reason why it stayed so painful after doing it for weeks. My little girl was able to latch but wasn’t able to have the correct suction because she has a tongue tie. There is a place out in Gilbert that specifically does babies, they make it a priority to get you and your baby in to fix the issue since it affects feeding.

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I asked my pediatrician if my baby had a tongue tie and he said “a little bit but it’s not too bad. If your nipple hurts during breast feeding then just try to TURN YOUR NIPPLE so that it doesn’t hurt.” He literally wanted me to turn my nipple like a knob! I don’t think he ever saw a boob before! Lol 😂 I learned that pediatricians actually don’t have to go through any lactation training while lactation specialists have to do 5,000 hours before they get to even touch a boob! Lol. I’d say, if you want to see if there’s a tongue or lip tie, call a lactation specialist. They can usually come to your house. It’s an awesome and worthwhile investment.

I pump and bottle feed my baby (two weeks) also! I find it much more enjoyable than breastfeeding but it makes me happy that I can still feed him my milk! You go momma!

For the first month I pumped and bottle fed breast milk to my baby because it was less painful but once my hormones leveled out it was uncomfortable but not painful anymore. My baby is now 5 months and now he’ll put himself on my boob and there’s no pain or discomfort. For the most part I can’t even feel him eating anymore. Once you get past the first month it gets so much easier but don’t feel bad if you decide not to stick with breast feeding cause it’s hard.

You are not a bad mom!! You are feeding your precious baby, that’s all that matters 😉

Never ! I forced myself to do it until six months a was depressed I missed all those sweet moments trying to be and do something I didn’t want too .. switched to formula and immediately the depression was gone and I was relieved! To each their own

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Amen!!

Your baby has food. He is happy. You are happy. What on earth is wrong with that?? Enjoy it, Mama!

I found out we had thrush a couple months into only pumping because it was too painful to breastfeed. The dr will give you both meds and that helped me!

Beautiful blessing

I did just that with my daughter and it went fine. She was ebf for her first 3 months until I went back to work. I bf intermittently and it was so much easier and less painful. With my son I only made it a month bc the lactation consultants I spoke with kept telling me to just power through it, but I was bleeding and splitting pretty horribly and it was excruciating until I finally got mastitis and the meds dried me up. My point is, do what works for you and don’t go through unnecessary pain. It will put a drain on your relationship with your little one. She needs a happy mama and a full belly, however you achieve that is great.