• E
  • Jamaica Plain, United States
  • 2 years ago

Haunted by unfaithfulness

Two years ago, he cheated. I forgave him and tried to move on. But now it haunts me, because last summer I found out more lies about it (it wasn’t a one-night stand. He tried for a relationship and had told her I was okay with it!) I ambushed him about it, still don’t like the answers I got even though he apologized and said it’s the worst thing he has ever done. I don’t feel like I’m allowed to bring it up anymore. I still have nightmares about it. It still haunts me almost every day. We have a family together. How will I build trust again? Whenever ANYONE cheats, an acquaintance or someone on TV, I feel sick and can barely look at him. Will it ever stop haunting me?
  • E
  • TN, US
  • 2 years ago

Don't take the advice of leaving him if you have a family together. It's a despicable thing he did and he doesn't deserve you, but your children deserve to have parents who love each other. Talk to him about it as much as you need to. It isn't off limits if it's still effecting you. Seek counseling if that's a good fit for you too, go on more dates to try to respark your own romance, and if he's truely sorry try your best to forgive him. It'll make things easier on you and help the healing process for you both.

  • A
  • San Rafael, United States
  • 2 years ago

It haunts you because it was a horrible things that was done to you. Just leave and you wont be haunted anymore, start opening up your heart to seeing other men and let them haunt your dreams... A much more pleasant experience if you ask me ;)

  • S
  • Michigan City, USA
  • 2 years ago

My ex cheated one me more than once. I forgave him 3 times before I finally had the courage and strength to divorce him. Now I'm in a marriage that is amazing. No more resentment. No more worrying. No more feeling inadequate. Just happiness and love! For me it never got better. I always felt he was cheating on me. I would then snoop and constantly question where he was. It was stressful. So glad I'm done with living like that!

  • N
  • Fort Worth, United States
  • 2 years ago

I went through this same thing. The first year of my husband and i’s relationship he slept with my BEST FRIEND. I chose to forgive him but I was mean to him for a year after I found out. He swore it would never happen again & he has proved it to me. I just had to find it in my head to forgive him. Trust is hard to get back. Communicate with him & see what can be done to fix things.

  • R
  • Denton, USA
  • 2 years ago

I empathize with you. I've been cheated on and it hurts horribly. You have to stay busy and want to forgive. Forgive for your sanity not because you accept it as it was ok. Its a horrible way to live both of you. You don't want both of you living miserable every day. Be the best you and in time you will heal as long as you try to heal. Do not bring it up. It does no good.

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