What would you do?

I found out last night he has been cheating … he begged me to go over and he spent an hour in the RR before actually getting in the shower and when he was done he stood in front of the tv on his phone as if he were so into the movie… he laid next to me and I could feel it in my bones something was up so I just waited until we were both sound asleep I knew I’d wake up while he was snoring and I couldn’t help but check his phone of course he left it near the tv while he slept… I opened it and he left it open on Snapchat ofc that would be the first place I’d check… he was messaging a female that entire time he was in the RR… I scrolled seen a bunch of Ily texts and how he couldn’t wait to spend the whole day with her and how he wouldn’t know what to do if she’d left him.. and ofc lots and lots of explicit and vulgar messages and pictures… he was sending and receiving… all the nights he “fell asleep” he was talking to her … All the times he “forgot to reply” he was talking to her … it’s sad because I actually believed every word he said to me but he said the same thing to a complete stranger… he “loved” me because he was alone… the worst part is she’s from Germany… she’s across the whole sea!!! And he chose her over me … I was pacing back and forth trying to figure out what to do cause he had picked me up and I didn’t have my car … I continuously got up to go pee and vomit I was soooo sick to my stomach… the last time the toilet was still running after I had flushed he got up kissed my forehead and turned it off… came back and put his head at the bottom of the bed and wrapped his arm around me.., I felt DISGUSTING… he asked what’s wrong and I said nothing .. he asked again and again until I finally got fed up and I said “what would you do if you found out I’m cheating?while I’m pregnant ?” I asked this 3xs and each time he said IDK … I turned over and something came over me I got up put on my shoes grabbed my purse and said take me home YOURE THE CHEATER… YOURE CHEATING ON ME !!… he got up and walked out the door behind me.. I got in the backseat and I just started questioning him over and over … he told me “idk what to say” The entire way I was just pouring my heart out and he had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO SAY… I decided to text the girl… She knew nothing about me I asked how and where they met she said “a game” Continuously apologized… And when I got home I got in my car and went 120 on the highway I drove until I got to corpus, I didn’t know what to think or do .. he didn’t text or call crickets I texted the girl and asked if he’d apologized she said he did … and that broke me .., if I weren’t already broken before …he then texted me … only because she was otp with him and he had nothing to say for himself… nothing at all … I called and went off and added her to the call … he hung up … I asked him why over and over.. and finally he said “I can’t help that I have feelings for her” then “what do you want me to say I’m falling out of love with you” I told him “F YOU!” I want nothing to do with you and you don’t have to worry about me or this baby don’t call text or contact me in any way… I then told his sister.. EVERYTHING she replied hours later because she was sleeping saying how sorry she is and how mad she is with him and how I don’t deserve this… also told me how she her parents and the rest of his family would be there for me regardless.. I really appreciated that because they don’t have to be … it’s been hours and he hasn’t tried contacting me .. lol he is in love with a woman (well she looks pretty young if you ask me )he will probably never meet and I am so heartbroken he threatens that he will take me to court if I try and keep the baby from him… but I truly want nothing to do with him..
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Sorry it’s such a long paragraph I am lost for words

I am sorry you are having to deal with this. It sounds like you have to do what’s best for you and your baby and that is focus on the two of you without him around. I don’t know why men make such stupid decisions I wish I could answer that for you!!!!

don’t put him on the birth certificate!!!! that will make it much harder for him to fight for custody since he’s not legally the father. it’ll be a whole lot more hoops to jump through if he still decides to do so and he’ll have to get a paternity test to prove he’s the father. i hope everything turns out okay for you 🫶🏼🫶🏼 good luck mama

So sorry. Honestly it’s up to you if you want to forgive him. But you have to go in knowing that if you do, you’re gonna have to let go of that in order to move on. Because it will be hard. My late husband cheated on me early on in the relationship. I forgave him. We were married for 11 years and he passed away unexpectedly. I come to find out he had been seeing another woman for 3 years and was spending about $600-$800/month on OF. I always had the gut instinct he was cheating. I would address it and he would deny it with the reminder that I needed to forget about what had happened early on in the relationship. It’s just very hard to “forget”. Just keep that in mind.

@Kelsey I am so hurt … I truly never saw myself in this situation…

First of all this is sad as hell🥺 I’m so sorry this happened to you , honestly it seems like he doesn’t deserve to have you or this baby in his life for the simple fact of he can’t just be honest in telling you how he was feeling instead of cheating, I think you handled it perfectly by getting away from him immediately you don’t need stress at this moment in your life and so whatever or whoever is adding on to that stress even if it’s the child’s father gotta go🤷🏾‍♀️ praying you feel better🥰

I agree with Sydney, don't put him on the bc and also go no contact with him since he's not even showing concern for you and your unborn child. Hell, I wouldn't even tell him im in labor let his family tell him after baby is born. F that trash of a male. Any male that cheats on their pregnant SO is grimey and lowest of the low. U can chose to forgive him, but just keep in mind most males will repeat their actions and just get better hiding it especially if they're not even fazed about getting caught. Look out for you and your child and it seems like his family will be there for you, so that's good at least. I'm sorry you're going through this, no one deserves to be cheated on, like literally break up if you feel you want someone else it's not hard

I’m so sorry. It’ll take time, prayer and patience. It’s hard to find that out even if you’re not feeling it. If he cheated once, he’ll do it again unless he makes some big changes!

My ex was cheating and lying and I found out I was pregnant a month after I ended things with him. I’m not putting him on the birth certificate and currently have him blocked on everything. You and the baby deserve so much better. Leave and don’t ever look back!!❤️

@Katie he is the one who got me pregnant. A father? No a father wouldn’t put the mother of his child through this much stress .. the baby isn’t even born yet I could only imagine when they are I want nothing to do with him … even his family agrees

@Trish you are right about this!!!! Getting me pregnant doesn’t make someone a father. Anyone could’ve gotten me pregnant. It takes a man who steps up and treats me and the child with love and respect to be a father. Otherwise, he can get tf out of my life !!! You’re doing the right thing.

@Marissa the man who takes care of the mom and child is the real hero! I agree.

@Marissa he doesn’t respect me at all … I am so hurt rn I can’t do anything but cry I feel so alone and abandoned… I feel like a little girl who’s trapped and there’s no way out… I’m broken and I can’t pick up… I feel so low and so dirty and worthless I know there’s better days ahead but right now I feel like there isn’t … how could someone do this to someone the “love” you’re supposed to fight through the bad days … I’ve truly never done anything but love him … maybe I loved him to much and to hard because he just took advantage of me he fell in love with me because he was alone and thought nobody else would love him for him… I would never wish bad on anyone but the way I’ve been feeling about him… so be it

@Anonymous for Safety I agree as well

@Trish girl you can message me any time. I know how hard this is but you deserve SO much better. He is not a man and doesn’t deserve to be loved by you! Someone someday is going to make you feel so worthy and loved and it’ll make you realize why this all had to happen.

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Girl I feel you went through the same i immediately put my child’s father on child support he hasn’t been around missed all the court dates just shows u how grimy these men can be I’ve raised my daughter all by myself since she was born and she don’t even say dad nothing I’ve told myself to not allow him to come because he obviously doesn’t care and can’t just come and go when he wants too because it’s gonna hurt the lil one in the long run wondering why her dad keeps leaving and coming back, you gotta do what’s best for you girl💟. Stay strong we got this 💪🏾❤️

@Marissa thank you for your kind encouraging words I really needed that I hope everything goes well for you and your little one as well you deserve the whole world and nothing less 💗 a child is a blessing and in a world full of hate and lessons they can change your world for the better ❤️

That is an absolute terrible thing to go through, I’m so sorry. You handled it well and I agree with the other ladies, don’t contact him and don’t put his name on the bc. He’s not worth an ounce of your love, in time it will be much easier. I’m proud of you for putting your foot down immediately, I know it’s hard to confront someone like that but good on you for doing it! Your love and strength will help your child grow!

@Amena thank you so much 😭

All of you amazing ladies and all of your sweet words and support… thank you all so much… I am currently in the emergency room.. I guess I over stimulated myself This is so unhealthy I feel awful you are all so kind again thank you all

@Trish I get it, I promise! My baby’s dad is not in the picture at all. But, my boyfriend has done everything possible to be there. Even though yes dangerous and toxics, it still saddens me that he’s made zero effort(except to mess with me). I want to tell you-there is a way out. It might not be your dream or first choice at first, but give it time and patience. Is there someone you can trust other than him? Talk to them about it. I was in a horrible situation, those who loved me were exactly happy at first, but the supported me and stood by me. I’m here, too if you ever need!!

My best friend was cheated on at 6 months. They dated for 15 years and had been married for 1.5 yrs prior. As hard as it was, she left him and moved back in with her parents temporarily. It was rough not gonna lie but she had her friends and family to support her. They are now finally finalizing the divorce and have gone their separate ways and dating other people. Her daughter is 1.5 years. She’s met a guy who’s single and is really taking to her daughter. I’m hopeful for them.

Sending love and support, I hope everything is okay with you ❤️❤️

I’m so sorry that happened to you… I think you’re right to cut ties with him romantically and to not speak or engage with him thru your pregnancy however to keep someone from their child because they wronged you emotionally is not fair … go to court work visitation options as long as he is a fit parent and won’t put the child in any harm… cheater doesn’t mean bad parent. I hope you have a much smoother pregnancy covered in love warmth and support

@Laura he is completely unfit. He dies drugs is unstable can’t keep a job for longer than a few months .. he isn’t a bad person but he does horrible things I don’t want this around an unborn or newborn child .. I thought this would make him grow up … but no he’s even more childish now

Now that I can understand

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