@Michelle it’s ok to teach a child empathy…
@Michelle she can also not ignore ppl and just said “idk” or “I don’t wanna talk about it”. That way she’s setting a boundary but not being rude. Teaching them to not be rude if not manipulation imo
@Michelle that’s definitely an adult’s frame of thought. No one said she’s responsible for keeping them happy. You’re not responsible for your emotions you’re responsible for your ACTIONS. Being able to share how you feel with each other is a bound, making a child believe their actions have no punishment or effect on others emotions is more harmful. I have a great communication setup with my 5 year old daughter who tells me everything about her day, time with dad or her moods of the day just based off of me communicating with her from a young age. She never does things because she feels she has to to make mommy happy, but because she’s aware of others emotions, her own, her environment as well as right from wrong You still have no advice at all for the mom above ma’am
I just dont think that telling a child they made you feel a certain way is a good idea. That child is not responsible for the way you feel in that situation, you are responsible to control your own emotions. I personally think that telling them that made you feel that way is just setting them up to shut you out because they won’t want to make you feel bad or hurt so then they don’t talk about things cause they’re afraid of how you feel instead of how it could help them. 🤷🏼♀️
@Michelle telling a child how something makes you feel is not manipulative 😂😂😂 teaching a child how their actions makes others feel is very important. It also teaches children to use “I feels” as well as express their emotions Allowing behavior to continue will lead to problems not only at home but at school too and in the future. She’s 6 not a toddler and primarily with her father and step mom. They’re the primary caregivers and there’s no way she can continue to disregard mom. You could’ve gave alternative advice, you gave nothing but rebuttals of everything I said and told what not to do along with assuming
Saying to a child “this makes me feel _____, you don’t want to make me feel____, do you?” That is just manipulation to get kids to feel guilty and talk. Noone is responsible for making you made or upset, that’s how you react to what you see or hear. You are responsible for how you feel and react to a situation, not the child. She’s 6, she may not know how to answer the question depending on what and how you’re asking. Her mother could also have some thing to do with it. Just let her know that you are always there for her and she can be honest no matter what and that you won’t get mad or upset with her. I wouldn’t make her answer or punish her for not answering but let her know that she can be honest without any repercussions.
I’d call her again, get eye level and ask her what ever the question was. If she does not answer try something like “Baby, did you not understand the question? You know it’s not polite to ignore me or daddy when are talking to you. That makes me feel _____ when you don’t answer me. We don’t want to make the people we love feel _____ do we? I know you don’t. So let’s try this again (ask question)” If she does not reply you’ll definitely have to talk with dad and have him have a sit down with her and discuss different punishments for when she disrespects her guardians or adults.
Any ideas on what to do? I am 7 months pregnant too so I can’t take her to a salon yet.. I thought about taking her out but I don’t want her thinking that she gets these things when we act like this.
Her mum may well be in her ear again an being six she wants to make her mum happy. Sadly mum sounds like a piece of work an is trying to us her daughter to wind you up. Personally I would try taken her out for the day an spending some girlie time together an just letting her know that although her behaviour towards you isn’t acceptable but you understand she’s got a lot going on an you will always be their for her. It may as well just be a stage but be firm with her an let her know her behaviour isn’t right an she she be polite when she’s being spoken to xx
I don’t know if it is the same, but my stepdaughter absolutely ignores me. She will tune out and act like she didn’t hear me sometimes. She will pretty much ignore me 100% if the tv is on. I physically stop whatever distraction is happening, not aggressive but tv gets turned off, toys get taken, dogs get kicked outside etc I try again with what I was asking or telling her. If I still get nothing I will will raise my voice a bit and repeat myself and tell her I need her to respond so I know she heard and understands. Sometimes I will ask her to repeat what I asked. I get attitude! But It’s mostly like we let her watch tv in the morning while we make breakfast etc and are getting ready for the day so it is mostly simple asks like, ok sweetie get to the table and eat or ok time to get dressed, brush your teeth and face and let’s get your hair done. Or put away your toys, hang your towel, eat your dinner, put your dirty clothes in the hamper, clean your room🥴😅 she is 7.