Stay at Home dad?
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@Leah Simon Very true. I didn't think about that I shouldn't want to be "in control" which will be hard for me.
@Chapin That's what I thought about after he told me he'd rather do it vs someone else. I'd like to see how well he is able to do with boy of them. I believe he will do decently with watching them but with our toddler I think it will require more work because I'm trying to potty train her and I want her to do some learning. He's a bit more strict and stern than I am so I guess that's more of what I'm concerned about as well as diapers/potty training. My toddler also still nurses and sometimes she wants it during the day when I'm trying to get her only on night feeds.
@Anna wow, that's great! What all does your husband and daughter do during the day?
My husband has been a stay at home dad for the last 3 years with our daughter. We now have a 2 month old baby and he will continue to be the stay at home parent when I go back to work. It just makes more sense financially for me to work. We are also considering homeschooling. It took a little bit to get a routine, but my daughter is thriving and my husband says it’s the most fulfilling “job” he’s ever had. Our household runs so smoothly and I come home to dinner every day. It’s been awesome for our family. If your husband wants to do it, definitely worth trying!!! There’s so many positives to one parent being home.
Why not do it and see what happens? If it's not working out then do daycare
Could you do a test run for a week or so? Defining what you need him to do might help, like saying you aren’t available from 9-5pm. It’s not unreasonable for you to be wary of this, it would be his full time job technically and you need to be able to work. He should understand that without creating an argument. Otherwise if he protests I’d think maybe he’s trying to put some of the responsibility on you, and that’s not fair at all
If you do it, you have to let him do things his way (of course being mindful that his way is safe). If you try to micromanage it will not work. But I know a few really great stay at home dad's, so it can definitely work!
He does all of the stuff around the house - cleaning, laundry, dishes. She helps him or plays independently. She goes to the grocery store with him. They play outside a lot. Listen to music. There’s constantly a stack of books on our couch that we read throughout the day. We didn’t do screens until she was 2, and even now we only watch something for about an hour before dinner - and we watch together with her. So no screens during the day. We believe kids learn by being included/involved in all the stuff adults do, so she’s learning just by living life with him! Once she’s older we will probably do more structured learning but for now this is great.