MIL wants to change my baby’s diapers

Absolutely nothing wrong with the child’s grandma changing it’s nappy. Unless you know there is something in her history to suggest she is a predator, you are being over the top. She just wants to be involved with the baby.

It’s odd that she keeps bringing it up

I think she just wants to be helpful and feel needed. Absolutely nothing wrong as Jill said. My parents look after our LG at least once a week while we're at work and it's so good. The bond she has with my parents is absolutely beautiful. I wouldn't have it any other way. Its also nice that she gets to stay over and hubby and I can have the odd night to ourselves where we get to go to the theatre and other things that we enjoy doing

I'm sure she can pick up that you don't trust her with that. Yet you trust her to provide housing for him and help while you're tired.

@Rachel she didn’t say her mum can change the baby, she said only “mom and dad change diapers” meaning baby’s mum and dad! If she doesn’t want anyone to change her baby’s nappy/diaper that’s up to her Whenever mil talks about changing the nappy could you say “no thanks but could you do this instead?” And offer her something else to do? If you want x

Your baby your choice! I know grandparents want to help out but that seems a bit weird and obsessive

You’re not alone, I don’t let anyone but me or dad change diapers, I just don’t feel comfortable with it. I would tell her straight up no diaper changes so maybe she will stop mentioning it.

My mum loves changing my babies nappy, they have a right chat and giggles. He loves it. I think it's sweet and at least she's offering all jobs and not just "nice" ones personally. She probably just wants to help out and be useful and not just a roof over your head maybe?

My mom AND MIL love changing diapers and I use cloth as well. It’s something related to wanting to be useful. My mom has even tried to push me out of the way. Since my baby breastfeeds this is the only outlet to be “motherly” to them. I also find it annoying so I try to give them small tasks to make them happy.

I let my parents and aunts and his godmother change my baby but thats just me its kinda weird tht she seems obsessed with changing ur babys diaper if anyone seemed tht eager to change my baby i definitely wouldnt let them u set a boundary and she has to respect it

People miss having a baby. I let family change my daughters diaper a couple times in the beginning and then I stopped allowing it. It is weird. Unless you need them to.

There are plenty of other ways for her to be involved with the baby...but changing diapers is the only thing she's this fixated on doing? Nope, sorry, I wouldn't allow it. She wouldn't even be allowed to watch while I or my husband changed diapers, either. Seriously, who wants to watch that, anyway? 🙈

i let my family change my sons diaper so long as me or my husband are around no exceptions. family or not the risk is too high and you never know what someone is thinking regardless of how long you’ve lived with them. if she feels she wants to feel included, offer maybe prepping bottles etc?

@Rachel my mom doesn’t change him

She’s just trying to help you out by the sounds of it. I think it’s hard for MILs as they know they aren’t the mums mum and feel pushed out or useless. If you have concerns your partners mum is a predator, that’s a conversation you should raise with your partner. Honestly, she just sounds like a helpful mum whose trying to bond with her DIL and give you both a break. I’d take the help, takes a village.

Thank you all. I do have ppa and now I realize that because of my ppa I don’t let anyone change his diapers. I’m going to try to let her today.

I would be a bit less likely to let her if she kept pushing, but I’m sure she probably just sees it as bonding and probably hasn’t changed one in years! My friend has changed my boys nappy twice and she always asks when she’s round as she doesn’t have a baby and finds it fun. It’s not always malicious😊

Only time my parents have changed my boy is when they look after him whilst I'm at work and only if he needs changing (i only do a couple of hours so change him before I go and then when I'm home) I dont get what her obsession is ? Nice of her to offer to help but if you've said no she shouldn't keep bugging about it

I mean there’s nothing really wrong with letting someone else change the baby’s diaper, but the fact that she’s SO like obsessed with it is weird to me. Like I get that she may want to help or whatever but why on earth is she constantly watching and asking?! Regardless of PPA or anything else, I think you have the right idea by thinking that’s strange behavior.

@Brielle thank you… I felt like I was weird for thinking it was strange. And I’m not in any way implying that I think she’s a predator either. I think if she wasn’t so weird about it I might have let her before… but we’ll see. I’m gonna try to get into therapy or something and see if that will help me and I’ll see how I feel about it then

Post writer don’t let people here make you feel like you need therapy because you don’t want someone else (doesn’t matter if it’s baby’s grandma or not) changing your baby’s nappy! If you want to have therapy by all means go ahead but don’t let people make you feel that way about this particular thing. I don’t let anyone change my baby’s nappy (unless they need to and I’m not there) because I don’t want them to. Simple as that. Doesn’t make me or you wrong or over the top as people here have said. And mil is being really weird watching in case she ever “gets to” change the nappy, it should be incase she ever “needs to”. She’s a silly cow, don’t second guess yourself my dear x

@Munaza thank you so much.

@Jill who are you to tell her she’s being over the top. If that’s her rule as a mother then the grandma needs to stop obsessing about it. I’m sure you’d want someone to respect the rules you have for your baby.

@Toya you damn right 👏🏽👏🏽