Not a fan of Mother’s Day

I’m starting not to like Mother’s Day. The past three years have been a fight after another. This year my MIL wants us to go to her house told us last minute even tho my family is having another party at my grandmas house with my entire family and we knew about this one for weeks. My MIL was last minute just with her kids and grandkids. My husband was yelling at me because I had told him “ what if we tell you mom let’s go to dinner Saturday night, since my family party was already in the plans she’s the one that is messing up the schedule. He got mad at me saying I’m selfish that I make this and my birthday all about me even tho other people are involved and need to be considered. Am I wrong for suggesting to not see his mom and go later time or even the day before? Like idk he said “I have a lot going on and all this is making me not want to be with you” I started crying and ended the conversation. An hour later I said sorry if I was being not considerate of your feelings of seeing your mom. Ohh wait back story my MIL Never looks for us never makes an effort my 3 year old doesn’t know that she’s grandma. We’ve lived in our house for 2 year has only came 3 times if that.but anyways he still giving me the cold shoulder and being short with me.

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Ugh I hate Mother’s Day too. So sorry u are going thru this.

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He can go be with his mom. You should take the kids and go to your family’s celebration. It’s not grandparents day, her getting her son is fair. You tried compromising and he’s angry, that sounds so immature on his part. Your birthday is about you. Mother’s Day is about you, especially since this is your family unit. He can do something for his mom and you yours, but you’re a family unit and in this family YOU are to be celebrated. He doesn’t want to be with you because you’re trying to find a reasonable solution to your MIL’s last minute plans? Yuck. Cold shoulder is also super manipulate of him.

Don’t apologize, you were being considerate. You’re not abandoning your plans because he has decided his mom takes priority. It’s your day, you should spend it how you want. He can throw a fit to his mom, it’s her job to deal with it. I always loved that Mother’s Day comes before Father’s Day. So I knew exactly how much effort I needed to match. It was always low.

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Oh yeah and we got in an even bigger fight where he slammed the door in my face and I left to my moms. Over honestly nothing. He wasn’t talking to me while I was getting our son ready and myself ready to go out and he was on the couch sleeping since he worked so hard today. He cut the yard… and cleaned up the garage. And wasn’t answering me so I pack up our son and his diaper bag stroller etc and he got mad because “I was leaving without him” when honestly I told him if your not gonna talk to me the whole time stay home. I saw him get ready so I put everything in the car and he took that as “I’m leaving without him”

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I definitely get it! I’m so sorry you’re going through this bud you’re definitely not wrong as a new mom, this is YOUR day and the rest of the family will either get with the program or they won’t. I tell my partner and my parents it’s MY DAY and if it’s not scheduled at least a week in advance it’s not happening (of course I’m more pliable, but I find setting such a far out deadline gives people time to figure it tf out) don’t let them ruin YOUR day! And do your husband, YES you are being selfish because YOU DESERVE! As moms we work HARD so if we choose to make MOTHERS day about our wants and needs, it is what it is!

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I think he is cheating on my too while the fight he turned off his location and has a deleted chat from someone suspicious I just have nothing to prove it with

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I don’t even celebrate Mother’s Day, my mom lives in Utah, my grandma sends a text and my MIL never says anything. I can’t afford to do anything and if I don’t plan it, my husband doesn’t either. So it’s just usually another day to me. As well as my birthday. My fights with family usually come on Easter, thanksgiving and Christmas because my MIL says we spend every holiday with my family even though she lives 2 1/2 hours away. And some of my family is in the same town as me and some live 45 minutes away. I don’t know. I hate holidays altogether tbh so I can understand.

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Mother’s Day is about YOU. You are the mother of his child/ren. You should be celebrated. If he’s so into his mom, he should go celebrate her without making it a big deal. You have your own mom to celebrate. But it is about you and up to you. And your birthday is no brainer to know that it’s about you. Sounds like what you have is a husband problem. I’m sorry you had a rough Mother’s Day. Happy Mother’s Day beautiful and to every woman here and out there ❤️.

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Cancelling Easter…

So my step son (11) lives with us full time we’ve started with an issue of him stealing little stuff from school, taking his brothers clothes from his mums here without anyone knowing ect but now
He’s also got the habit of taking chocolate and crisps out the kitchen to the point of he’s eating all my 1 year olds snacks like the 6month+ wafers and then he’s got no snacks. I’m buying loads of stuff to last us the month and he’s going through them within less then a week 🫠 (he never gets told no to snacks either unless it’s just before a meal then he gets told to wait until after hes ate)
He has now gone through all the chocolate we hid for Easter that was also his two little brothers and he’s gone through the stuff my mum brought round for them. So now iv got just over a week with hardly any money to try and get all the Easter stuff back. We’ve sat and spoke about it and why he feels like need to just take and we get a “i don’t know” or “it’s just snacks”

My thing is should I re buy him Easter stuff or leave it as a “you’ve already had you Easter early behind our backs” he’s not missing out completely because he has Easter at his mums but I feel like there’s nothing more we can do other then put locks on cabinets so he can’t get in them but that’s just stopping him from getting to the thing he wants not necessarily him learning 🤷🏻‍♀️
My partners just in that “can’t be arsed” “just replace it” where we have 1 child together and 2 step children and a baby on the way so just constantly going out and replacing stuff really isn’t happening ☹️ he’s agreeing with not giving him anything for Easter but I feel guilty about it but he has teqnically had his Easter + more…

We have also spoken to his mum about it and she just says she has locks on the doors and she did it as a kid and laughs about it which just feels like shes validating what he’s doing.

Sorry for the rant just wanted to see other people opinions and views as I feel so guilty to cancel Easter for him but at the same time we don’t have the money to re buy everything he’s gone through 🫠

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