Who else has had a rough life?

I guess I'm just posting this to get it off my chest.... Growing up, was difficult for me. I was the third child for my mom and fourth child for my dad. My dad smoked weed (which I don't find wrong) and was an alcoholic. He would drink every night until he was plastered. Sometimes he would start earlier in the day, but he usually started in the evening time. He would stay up blasting his electric guitar and listen to music on full blast, even on school nights. I went to like 10 different elementary schools due to us moving as around a lot. I have SEVERE anxiety and depression. My oldest sister (dad's first born) didn't live with us, but my older sister and brother did. My father and I were constantly into it. Around my friends I would call him "my owner". Like all kids I made plenty of mistakes but I really wasn't that bad. I would get terrified when my dad would yell at me, especially while he was drinking, I was scared for my life. One of his favorite things to do while getting into me would be to get a couple inches away from my face and stare into my eyes, he'd look like a demon was inside of him. My little brother and I are 15 years apart. My mom worked nightshift, my older siblings and I would be responsible for getting the baby to sleep, even on school nights. There's one in particular I remember my older sister wasn't there it was just me, my older brother, the baby, and my dad, I was laying down on my bed my dad came in and basically flung my little brother on me and said y'all don't get to sleep until y'all get this baby to sleep.... we were up until VERY early that morning. That day I told my mom about it and she said "you're probably exaggerating, sounds like you are a bit" my older brother butted in (which he usually didn't do) and said "no that's exactly what happened". Then her excuse, because she always had one for him was "we'll he was drunk" (like no duh he always is). There was also a time my mom was working night shift (obviously) and my dad said I had to sleep with his that night (I was 15) and I'm usually a light sleeper, well in the middle of the night I woke up and my dad had his hands down my pants groping my butt (I was facing away from him), I jumped. And he yanked his hands out and started snoring (I think he was playing asleep, but who really knows). When I was little I remember he'd hold me really tight until I'd fall asleep. (kinda weird) My dad passed away almost a month after my little brother turned one. This sounds awful but in a way I was sorta relieved. I was always scared for my life, he got on to just me 90% of the time, my little brother woulda had to deal with him for 17 more years. I just turned 22, Now my mom seems very toxic, she's with another guy who drinks everyday not nearly as much as what my dad did tho. He has kids he only gets to see once in a while and he treats them like gold. He treats my little brother well from what I can tell over the phone (we don't live near each other and I only met him and his kids 1 times for like 2-3 days) expect when his kids are there. His kids are a bit older a girl and a boy 14 and I think 11. My little brother is just turned 7. When his kids are there my mom and her guy constantly are getting onto my brother for little things, he's always in time out when they are there. Who ever read this whole thing, thank you for taking the time to read it❤️