Oppositional defiance

Does anyone have a kid with ODD? I have a 5 yr old son and he’s showing major signs of this. He’s also extremely aggressive toward me and gets a grip on my hair, pulling and won’t let go. I have ptsd so when he does that I get triggered. He controls my entire household and my hubby and I feel like prisoners. He’s also autistic and lately I’ve had to chase him for blocks because he runs away. He also thinks it’s funny to see me in pain and says he wants to throw me over the fence into the cactus. He’s a bit of a joker so I don’t know how to take his “jokes”. We have a behavior therapist and he’s also In aba. The therapist says we have have an uphill battle. Just curious to hear other people’s experiences.