So upset having to bring my mat leave early
So I'm highly emotional today. Last two days I've been in pain.
Walking, sitting, her moving and anything is pain. Sleep is so interrupted.
Today was my last midwife before my induction (a week Sunday). I was told that my baby is back to back. I have ketos in my urine due to gestational diabetes and I generally feel horrid and exhausted.
My midwife strongly recommended starting mat leave a week earlier as I am so tired, emotional and in pain. She said the rest will do my baby and me good. It will also give me time to harvest colostrum should my baby need help to regulate her sugars after delivery. Which I can't do regularly enough to build a supply working full time till the end.
I was due to finish on the 29th but with all that is going on and being so exhausted it was deemed impractical. This would only give me one day before her induction also.
I'm a teacher mostly admin at the moment but still struggling. I am so scared about losing a week's pay and this has kept me perhaps unrealistically thinking I can keep going with only only day before my induction and ignoring my body.
I just feel defeated and scared. I'm the main earner and although this has taken 5 years of infertility to get here, now it's here I'm so scared and overthinking absolutely everything.
My partner is on nights for two nights so being left on my own with my overactive and worrying brain isn't helping .
No real point to this just a ranting emotional and scared mess 😭