I agree. It's just very frustrating because she doesn't treat my younger siblings the way she treats me. It's clear there's favoritism.
I tried to talk to my mom about this at 44 years old and of course she made it all about her and wouldn't accept her faults. Some people will never change. And you can't make them. So j just have to love my mom from a distance. She'll never admit what she did to me and how she treated me. She told me she would never be ready for that conversation with me. It hurts but I have my life to live and I can't dwell on her anymore. I know how not to treat my children. I admit when I'm wrong. I say sorry and I tell them I love them constantly. You don't have to put up with your moms mess. I know it hurts. You can be better than her and live your own life with love and happiness.
I hate to sound pessimistic but I think that if your mother is narcissistic she is unlikely to admit to any wrongdoing on her end. I think the healthiest thing to do is to decide what your boundaries are, accept that she will not understand them and may challenge them, but stick to your guns and do what you think is best for you. Unfortunately you can’t make someone understand where you’re coming from if they are committed only to their own narrative.