Should I seek help?

3 weeks PP. I don’t even know how to explain what I’m feeling. Most days I’m okay but then someone will say something and it knocks me into a world full of sadness, upset and I’m just a different person. My mum made a comment after I told her I’ve changed to formula. She said- ‘you’re on maternity leave, you have the time to be breastfeeding’ that was my trigger. Only I know how much I wanted to BF, I tried and I even pumped after my nipples blistered and became so so sore. My supply wasn’t great and at the same time I was/an recovering from a more complex c section. I even said to my mum I was feeling tired to her responding with ‘I brought you up, don’t you think we got tired’ I’m not tired of my children. I’m just physically tired from not sleeping great at night and being in pain and just the early days of pp. I reacted and told her how I didn’t like it and she told me I’m miserable. Am I just being sensitive but I can’t seem to get past the comments made and the way people are around me. Like I genuinely feel like I cba with anyone. I had PPD 3 years ago and I don’t think I ever really got over it but I declined to take medication. Am I going through the same thing? Any advise is appreciated.
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First of all as Said above you need support and guidance not being judged, as well something important to set for yourself is setting boundaries so you have calmness talk about your triggers with your partner and what you feel like them to do. For example you can ask your partner to brush your heart as it’s a intimate moment and feels safe and cared for. As a new mother don’t forget you birthed a mother you need time to adjust and also heal from the c section. If you would like to have a 1:1 talk would be happy to help you and give you some tools. You are worth it, And your baby chose you as there mother don’t forget that sweetheart ✨😘

@Rachel Thank you.. your kind words have gone along way. ❤️

Take care of yourself sweetheart, and be kind to yourself. You're not broken or miserable or snappy, you're just sad. I have so much empathy towards you as its all still so fresh for me. Get your appointment booked and then you're one step closer to feeling yourself again x

@Rachel thank you. Even just reading your message has made me cry. I think it’s because I don’t feel like I have anyone around me for that real support, who really understands and says it’s ok you know. I think I might book a GP appointment or speak with the HV about how I’m feeling. I didn’t want the medication last time because I didn’t want to be labelled- it’s silly I know. I know I’m not myself. I’m sad, I’m down, I’m lost, I feel like I’m so alone and massively misunderstood. I can’t even mention PPD to any one because they will be like ahh your just miserable and snappy but I know what I feel. Anyways thank you for replying. Means a lot x

Sorry your mum made you feel like that. That is really not fair. Especially so soon after birth. If BF is not working out, there is absolutely nothing wrong with switching to formula, regardless of how much time you have! You need support not judgement. I suffered with PPD, refused medication but I told myself if it happened a second time around I would take the meds in a heart beat rather than lose any more precious time with my children to 'sad mum'. Its ok to use tools sometimes to take care of yourself, and medication is a tool. I would just recommend trying to get referred for CBT however, to make sure you are able to work through everything with proper support! Best of luck x

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