No Cooking Help

I just need to vent, and I feel kinda bad for doing so. So I’m currently 22 weeks, this is my first pregnancy and I had no idea it would debilítate me so much. I was terribly ill and completely bed ridden during my first trimester I had to quit my job, and survived off of chocolate milk smoothies with nutrients (breakfast essentials carnation brand), cereal, toast, and fast food my husband would bring but most of the time I was usually just asleep. Second trimester has been better but 95% of the time I am just exhausted, problem now is that I’m always hungry. So I started cooking again which I actually enjoy, I try to cook at least 2 meals a day brunch and dinner or a lunch we can turn into left over dinner with included sides. But some days my body exhaustion wins, I can’t even get out of bed and those days everyone is just digging around for scraps. There are 3 adults living in the apt myself, my husband and my sister. My husband works full-time which is why I feel guilty about making this but I am so confused as to why no one else can step up and make us a meal, 1 meal at the end of the day. They are all capable of making simple dishes; ramen, spaghetti, hamburger helper, Mac and cheese anything! But no, if I don’t cook something they will slap whatever they can on bread and call it a day, they won’t make me anything, and I’m just so frustrated of some nights going to bed hungry because they refuse to cook anything. I know we are all adjusting but 1 day where I don’t have to worry about feeding all of us would be nice. Everything else around the house we all pitch in, cleaning, pet care, but I’m the only one who cooks as well as gets the groceries, washes every dish before and after each meal, and the prep.

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This does sound frustrating, maybe they don’t realise how tired you feel and are probably thinking if you’re the only one who doesn’t work you can cook

Your husband should be taking care of you when he's home from work. Have you talked to him about it? Let him know that your body is working full time to literally grow a human. If he's not willing to take care of you now, that's a bad sign.

This is normal to feel like this, have you voiced your concerns with them? If not I suggest you do. How about other family? Anyone who can drop off weekly food for you? Hope your husband and sister are understanding.

This has also been a struggle for me eggs, cereal, oatmeal with fruits anything is good for breakfast. My boyfriend started to buy some frozen foods which I don’t know is good for me but better than not eating. Just in case there is a night or lunch I don’t have any food since he works a lot. I usually get pastas & some Type of frozen veg, preferably for me broccoli because of the folic acid.. I add some garlic butter and some seasoning and it’s ok for me. Make sure to buy fruits if you can I usually get some mandarins, raspberry, or strawberry or yogurt to snack on throughout the day. If I want a home cooked meal I look up some new easy recipes on tik tok or YouTube and ask him when he’s home if he can help me, or one my sisters.

@Aishah I’ve slightly tried to bring it to their attention. I do feel guilt for doing so because before I got pregnant I could do anything and everything around the house no problem, so now that I need help I guess I haven’t completely learned to accept asking for help up front. I had issues with my sister nagging me to wake up early to make her food, when I told her she was fully capable she just decided to not cook at all. I felt bad and got up and made the food. They seriously will not put in the effort. I don’t live close to my family or friends who are back in Cali, and my husbands family is an hour away and they won’t make the drive over here which I don’t expect them to but no they don’t offer food.

There's no guilt in asking for help, and now would be great to set up routine and support as when the baby comes as you won't get much time to cook and eat then either. One option if you're really worried it might put strain on your family is when you're feeling good is to cook extra and freeze it preprepared so you can simply ask if they can warm the meal up for you when you're not feeling well. Its far less work on their part and it will make it a lot easier to have a supply of healthy meals as a backup for harder days.

I'm the asshole that would cook for myself and nobody else just to prove a point. Depending on your level of petty lol.

Thanks for the update. I’m surprised your sister is acting this way. I’ll let you know that my man’s family and my family is also an hour away and they make the drive and help me cooking (despite me saying no). Talk to your husband again and let him know how you feel. Maybe your sister won’t help but maybe your husband will. Maybe they thought you were joking when you brought it up. If you need to spend the day together to cook do so and maybe you can cut the onions, veggies etc while sitting. And they can stand to cook cook. But please try! Also find some moms on here who can assist :) if you lived close to me I would help with bringing in food :)

I know this is not about cooking, but I am wondering about your water intake. It contributes to tiredness. Also, I like the idea someone suggested freezing your extra food after you cook it. Also, buying a lot of food you don't have to cook will help, like just three together a salad. Lots of fruits. Putting together meals that I super easy to make and storing large amounts in the fridge or freezer is a good idea.

@Keisha Valdez I think my water intake is decent, could definitely be drinking more. I will look into all the suggestions given and work my way around it. Thankfully we are moving back to my hometown onto my parents property in December, I know I will get help there especially since my mom loves to cook.

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