Bed sharing saved my sanity. Mine wakes a ton still
Also, I would suggest only putting him in his sleep spot when it’s time for sleep like if you can put him in a different spot for napping that he’s comfortable with that might help. My son only uses his crib when it’s time for bed he’ll usually nap on the couch while I’m doing work or in my bed because he can safely get down.
I would get the little one up by 8:30 absolute latest. Nap no later than 2:30. If they miss it and theyre really extremely tired give em a 30 if necessary. Definitely do bath time. Try to take them to a park. I know its getting cold now but just bundle them up. My son wants to go no matter how cold it is. Take them to the store to walk/run out that energy. Early dinner!!!!!! I would say finishing his last meal/snack around 8pm LATEST. Maybe to start the routine try getting them up super early. This worked for my little one. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night but not for more than 15 mins and its only when hes not feeling that great. Read them a book. I know most people wouldnt suggest this but i do school and work so a momma got to do what she gotta do. Some nights I let him watch a show that he’s only allowed to watch when it’s night time so when I turn it off, he understands it’s done, and when I turn it on, he understands to wind down.
Our schedule is
Wake up at 6:30 am
Naps right after when he gets in the car 1:40-2:35
Bath at 7:00
We aren’t always on schedule when school is out but we try to keep him busy
He is also 17 months. We had this routine since he was 12 months. Maybe longer but we moved him to his room at 12 months and it made our life so much easier. The reason we wake up early is because my oldest has to be at school by 7:30.
I still help my son to sleep initially and he sleeps through the night. We try to avoid naps after 4pm (he goes to sleep at 8/8:30) but my son has slept the the night since he was about 6/7 months old. Try making a routine and sticking to it as much as possible, maybe you dont get up every time he cries, or you do if he cries for longer than x amount of minutes.
Wake windows of 5/nap/5 if not 5.5 works best right now.
You might be encouraging it - if you give him attention or milk throughout the night.
Not saying attention is bad at all, but you may need to sleep train so he can learn to settle himself back down. I recommend Ferber and if that doesn’t work, extinction.
A few things that have helped us: 1. a wake window of 4 hours before bedtime, 2. Bedtime routine, 3. Ensure that he naps for 2 hours during the day(currently split into 2 one hour naps), 4. Sound machine is on all night, and 5. Ensure he eats enough calories during the day so he doesn't wake up asking for a bottle. I hope that helps you!
Does he put himself to sleep the first time? I had to do sleep training and it changed how he slept completely. If you are assisting him going to sleep the first time he will need you all night long. If he can learn to fall asleep by himself then he can do it on his own throughout the night. Babysleepmadesimple.com was the program we used and it worked for me and my friend.
What is babies nap schedule like for the day? If they are getting too much day sleep than baby will struggle through the night.