What would you do if your child’s father who’s been gone for eight years all of a sudden wanted to come back into his life?

How is his relationship with his other child? And another good question is why did she leave him? You want to make sure this man is changed if he’s truly wanting to be in your son’s life again

Danny, he doesn’t have a good relationship with any of his kids. I’m not sure why the wife left him. I don’t want to know. I’m just happy in my relationship and the guy wants to be a father to my son.

It's definitely a tough situation. I'm dealing with something similar. My son hasn't seen his dad for 4 years but I know he's eventually going to come back and want to see us and I'm like ugh just stay away at this point, we're happy without you. But since your bd is supposed to have visitation with your son, I do believe you should let him see him. and one day your son will understand who was there for him and who wasn't and he'll make the decision himself.

@ Bethany, my son doesn’t even ask for his dad. And I would give him back visitation but his father would leave my son with his father and his brother who can’t be around children. Not lying on my son’s father brother, my son’s father told me this himself

If it was me i wouldnt be having it at all. Hes already been manipulative to you in the past. And hasnt bothered until his new relationship failed? No way. Id be standing my ground and telling him he can go for visitation custody and thats all hes getting. If he fights for his son then you know he really wants this. Sorry to be negative but im just fed up of men parenting when they feel like it. Id be making him prove he wants to see his son.

If Im being completely honest, I would ignore him like he has probably done to you and your son for years. I wouldn't communicate with an abuser, what he has done is emotional abuse, dissappearing from your sons life for that long is neglect if he wants to drudge this all up again he'd have to take me to court, yes you will have to answer to your child we all will but I would make sure you're checking in on your son and his feelings about his father. As some one whose father was absent, even when he was around, I wish my childhood was more stable without him, and we could have reconnected when I was older, would have saved me a lot of money and time in therapy.

@ Amy, you’re not being a negative. He is just a piece of scum who wants his way.

Ny, I’m sorry you had to grow up with an absent father. You’re right and I’m okay with having to answer to my son.

I would’ve made sure the judge knew he wished the child died. I wouldn’t feel comfortable with unsupervised visits however, that’s not your decision….It’s the judges. Legally if visitation was set up then you can’t just disappear.

Haley, I didn’t disappear because I wanted to. I disappeared because my family was moving to another state. Plus my son’s father accused me of killing my second son, when my second son died from SIDS. I said that he leaves my son with his brother who’s not allowed to be around children because he went to jail.

I’m sorry this is something you have to experience, and I understand the hurt that he’s caused. At the end of the day, that’s still your child’s dad who he should be able to see and bond with. It doesn’t mean he has to spend the night at his house or be with him without you near by, but he definitely needs his dad in his life. It’s too many broken people out there and it’s because their dad isn’t there. If his dad doesn’t want to be in his life, that’s something on his dad, but if he’s wanting to be there, no matter how long it’s been, then he should be allowed to. People are allowed to change for the better.

If you know your son is better off without him then deny contact. If you think things might be different now then meet up with him at a coffee shop on your own and hear him out

You don't want him his wife didn't want him .... something tells me he's the problem

Jo, He is the problem. Every woman he’s been with has left him.

What do you think your son would want? You know your son best, he may be mature enough to have a say in this decision. You certainly don’t have to maintain a relationship with this man, but it’s possible your son might want to try some sort of relationship with his dad. And your son should be aware that based on dads history, it’s very possible dad will leave again and cause disappointment.

I would move lol he was gone for 8 years. I am all for letting absent parents develop relationships with their children, but I do not support the in and out and I feel your son will love meeting his dad but who will pick up those pieces once he leaves again? You! And that’s not okay. It’s a new and present daddy in the house… let him take you to court for visitation so you can make sure he doesn’t miss visit!

Ask your child if s/he wants to see their father, that's your answer..

Only supervised visitations if court ordered oh, but I will go to court and tell them he has been Mia for 8 years and try to get his visitation rights revoked you can’t just use when you’re gonna be a father and not

Kayleigh your right.

Supervised visitations. This man is wild and crazy that's why his wife left.

I would definitely let him have supervised visits and see how it goes from there. It’s about your son, so regardless of how he treated you your son deserves a chance to know his father. Upfront I’d definitely ask for it to be put on court records though so that he can’t miss a visit and see what he says. If he’s hesitant, you know his true intentions. If he’s for it, then great.