I am in the same boat. I already told my MIL and mom sorry but I don't want any visitors. My MIL was fine with it, she understood. My mom took it personally so I had to take the time and explain to her why. Eventually she understood and agreed that she would come when I'm ready for visitors.
People know the due date but I told a friend of mine I would call her to let her know I’m disappearing for a bit. That means I’ll be delivering and she could come to the hospital if she wanted but in no way do I want any other visitors. She did my baby shower and can keep a secret so I’m not worried about her. But no one else will know until after. If people do start showing up I know it will be my Dad or my brother in law telling folks and advertising.
I like @Amelyas idea of not telling anyone when you go into labor. This way you can have the time you need to yourself. Then, when you finally allow visitors, ask your SO to be the enforcer and let people know when it's time to go. There's also nothing wrong with telling people that you want to spend time with just you the babies and your SO for a little bit before your house is full of visitors. Hopefully people will understand this and as excited as they may be, it should be understood that this is also a very special time for your new little family to bond.
honestly if you can handle seeing a bunch of people in the hospital maybe doing that then having them kicked out and told to just go back home (if youre not having to stay for a few days maybe just say you are🤷♀️) and then dont invite them down for a while. the other option is just maybe not letting them know you went into labor until you wanna see people? just with twins and all your possible complications i definitely understand wanting to limit seeing people 😩
I have struggled with this same thing. Honestly you have to do whatever you want and feel right about. 1. I decided no hospital visitors 2. I said we’d let people know once we are home WHEN we actually want visitors I don’t think there’s a best , I think you just have to listen to how you’re doing and feeling and decide based on that. Maybe you’ll want everyone there, maybe you want. You could also set expectations that initial visits will be short 30 mins or whatever.