Birth didn’t go to plan but it’s okay!🤍

So I started having contractions 1am Monday morning after having my sweep on Friday & losing my mucus plug on Sunday. They were light at first I timed them just like period pains and then they got really intense by 3am so I called triage and was there by 5am. They examined me & I was only 1cm🙈but I was in agony, all I could have was paracetamol and diacodeine I think it’s called? My waters broke at 6.30am in triage as well. So instead of going home, they let me go up to the ward until I got to 4cm and could be moved to the delivery room. It took until 6pm to get to 4cm which wow didn’t realize it could take that long! By that point I had had some liquid morphine in the hope I’d be able to rest my eyes for a bit but unfortunately not. When I got down to delivery, the midwives and nurses were all so lovely. They set up a nice light, there was a bath & birthing balls in there and just a really comfortable space. I was set up on the gas and air and the monitor and carried on laboring, hoping it would go by quick. I think it was around 10pm and I was at 6cm, still only on gas and air and I felt the pain was so manageable. Didn’t feel the need for anymore pain relief. The midwives at this point were a bit concerned because baby wasn’t really moving in there & her heart rate was dropping low. It wasn’t a cause for emergency at that point, so I just carried on. By 2am when I was re examined, I had only gone to 7cm and a round of bloods they had done indicated I had an infection. The contractions had become unbearably painful and I felt like I couldn’t cope honestly. Midwife explained the reason why is cos I have an infection so the contractions naturally become more painful. They were becoming a lot more concerned about babies movements so a c-section was suggested by the anesthetists. My blood pressure was getting higher and higher, the infection was evidently getting worse & baby was very very stressed in there so I just made the choice to cos of how much pain I was in. I went for the c-section, in unbearable pain and had the spinal block injection. Then at 6.34am, my beautiful girl Lilah was born weighing 7 pound 13. Unfortunately, when she came out she wasn’t really breathing so the room got rushed with people trying to revive her, I didn’t have a clue about this until she had been revived as they tried to keep me so calm. In recovery, she went for checks and they indicated her oxygen levels were low & her skin had gone an odd grey color. We were taken up to the post natal ward and she went for checks straight away and they came back and told me that her lactate levels were too high, her infection markers were too high & she would need to go to neonatal care. I didn’t even get to hold her before she was taken to neonatal and she was put in intensive care. But when I tell you they cared and looked after her so much I was so grateful she was in good hands. Her infection markers are still very high for a newborn baby but her lactate levels are slowly decreasing which is a really positive sign and she needs to stay on antibiotics till Tuesday at the least so I need to be in the hospital until then. But I’m so glad we’re both okay & for those that are down or worried about not being able to have their perfect birth, I promise you none of it matters once they’re here. 🤍