Refusing to wear clothes

My 3 year old girl has a major tantrum / meltdown every day when she has to get dressed. It started off with not liking socks, the seams over her toes. Fast forward 2 weeks and it’s to the point where she hates tights / leggings / pants / knickers / coats etc It’s a massive deal everytime it comes to putting some clothes on. It’s really really making me miserable because I can’t find a solution and i honestly think it’s all behavoural. When her dad was putting her tshirt on before he even put it over her head she was saying ‘my eyes’ as though the top would hurt her eyes. Once the clothes are on, she forgets about them and carries on as normal. It’s the initial getting them on. Looking for advice or if anyone else has been through the same with their child.
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It’s not behavioural, I think she probably just wants power and choices. My same age daughter is a nightmare with clothes at the moment. She can now dress herself so she wants to choose her own and put them on. But she chooses ridiculous things and screams and tantrums when I try and override her decisions. Then every half hour or so she wants to change her clothes, goes into her drawers and throws everything around the room looking for new outfits. She won’t wear any of the Pretty dresses I have for her, just horrible and sometimes dirty old leggings. If she won’t dress herself my husband and I have to wrestle her screaming and crying to dress her and then she takes them off. It’s very hard trying to get her out. Sometimes we stay in all day because I can’t get her ready. And often she makes us really late for work because we can’t get her to nursery. I’m hoping to God it’s a phase. Feel better?

I don’t mind if she wants to choose what she wants to wear, but she refuses to wear any pants, so then if she chooses a dress to wear she refuses to wear knickers underneath. She goes to nursery in the afternoons and everyday is a nitemare getting her into her uniform. I just want her to be able to put clothes on without a meltdown each time.

Well you would mind if she was throwing everything around and getting filthy stuff out of the washing bin. So what if she doesn’t wear pants? It’s not really that big a problem, why is it making you miserable?

So what if she doesn’t wear pants? Really? So you think it’s appropriate to go to nursery with her top and bare legs? She has to wear clothes to leave the house, which she is refusing to do so, dealing with the massive tantrums over it daily is hard. Thanks for your helpful judgemental replies Aurelia 👍

I was trying to be nice and helpful and you just threw it back at me and made out your problems were worse. Everyone find this stuff difficult, not just you. Why would she have bare legs in Jan? Never heard of tights? Sorry no one has the right answer for you. How about tough shit?

She’s a child, not a robot

She won’t wear tights. You’re missing the point. She won’t wear clothes on her bottom half. Was looking for helpful advice that’s all.

My daughter went through a phase of not wanting to get dressed (still sometimes a battle) & we had to pin her down & try & get out the house before she could take the clothes off 🤦🏻‍♀️. What worked was giving her the choice of clothes but only giving her 2 or 3 options picked by you. From what you’ve described though it sounds like she might have a hyper sensitivity to the way clothes feel on her? I’ve seen Ferne McCann talk about her daughters sensory issues, might be worth having a look at that.

Thanks Lucy, yeah I will look into the sensory issues, it would make sense with how she’s feeling. With the school uniform I gave her the choice of dress and tights or top and pants, she just hates the tights and pants (plus socks and knickers) 🙈 so we are also just having to put them on her whilst shes screaming. In fairness the screaming has calmed abit over the past couple days, she still cries but not lasting as long.

Hopefully it’s a phase! Toddlers are challenging 😂

Definitely! 😂 shes my second child and i always thought the toddler stage was the hardest with my eldest but looking back it wasn’t as hard as this time round ha

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