Feeling so sad and guilty
I had a miscarriage on 1/20/2024 and I can’t stop blaming myself for it. I know it’s technically not my fault but I’m obese, have hypothyroidism, PCOS, pre-diabetic, and I’m in my late 30’s- all things that increase risk.
I can’t help but feel I should have lost more weight and exercised more, which would have helped to prevent it…. But in reality would it have?
I heard and saw the heart beat and swear I felt the moment I lost baby. It all keeps replaying in my head.
I’m blessed to have an almost 2.5yr old and love him to pieces but feel I’m not able to be as present for him as his deserves in my grief.
All my family lives out of state and husband works … I just feel so alone and sad.
I know I have to wait to try again. But I’m so scared to try again and possibly go through this all over. Just needed to get this out of my head… Thank you for reading.
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Thank you so much! I needed to hear all of this.
Sending love & light
As heartbreaking as it is and as much as we want to blame someone or something (most of the time ourselves), it is simply where the combination of male and female dna didn't fit together properly and our bodies chose to save that little baby any suffering. Spiritually, you gave that baby a perfect life. They didn't know hunger, cold or pain- they only knew you and had a perfect, full little life. We are the only ones who think it was too short. I wish you your miracle baby soon- in the meantime, treat yourself like you would your little one if they were hurt and sad. All the nice things and lots of hugs xx