C section or natural birth

Hello, my sister is also pregnant and was offered either a c section or labour birth. She’s opted for labour, but when I have been for my appointments, no one has asked me. I would prefer a c section just as I’ve got a lot of anxiety about giving birth and we’ve had people on my husband’s side go through life threatening labour so I’m very anxious. Anyway I expressed this to my midwife, in which she gave me a funny look and said no and I’d have to discuss that with my doctor. That was at our 12 week appontment. I’m now 16 weeks and still no one has mentioned anything to me. I was wondering at what stage I can request this and if I’m allowed to? Obviously if I can’t I won’t, but I was annoyed my sister was asked and I was basically shut down for even asking the question. Thanks

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You can have any birth you want to. The midwife can’t say no to you but clearly she is trying to discourage you. You do need to be referred to OB to talk you through all the risks and benefits of a c section and if you confirm you are happy with them, they will go ahead and book you in. It’s so hard in your first pregnancy to know what you can and can’t push for, but you do have to advocate for yourself, especially if you don’t have a very open midwife. Just keep asking for the referral at every appointment. There is plenty of time as they wouldn’t see you until 30+ weeks

My friend had a planned c section due to her anxiety, you should be fine. I'm 18 weeks and haven't been asked what I'd prefer either. I think this may be discussed at your 25wk with the midwife 😊

Hi! From what I’ve been told (pregnant with my first) they don’t start discussing birthing options until after 20 weeks when you’re put into the care of the maternity dept at the hospital/midwife centre you’re going to be going to! I asked when I’d do a birthing plan and they said not until 6 weeks before due date, so it might just be a bit early yet! I haven’t been asked about it and I’m 16 weeks too. I’m sorry that your midwife shut you down that doesn’t sound very supportive 🥺 at the end of the day it’s your decision and women should be empowered to make the choice themselves x

Thanks everyone, that’s really good to know. We’re ivf so we’ve had a lot of appointments and I wasn’t sure my rights

I think it’s still quite early for them to start discussing birth plans with you but because I feel anxious about my first birth, I asked for a c section at my first appointment with the midwife. She said everyone can request one if that’s what you want and she has referred me to a consultant who will go through risks (appointment not until June though)

This is my second pregnancy and will be my second c section by choice. I was told by midwife that it’s changed now and they follow what mum would prefer (always asking as safe to do so) but they don’t put up a fight as it’s about making you relaxed and comfortable xx

36 week appointment is usually when birth plans are discussed but you could mention sooner if you want a section. I had my son at 33+2 and had never spoken to anyone about a birth plan. I had to have a section with my son as he was footling breach and premature. Hoping this time I don't need a section as it's a huge operation, with risks and I just don't like not being able to move around after etc and having to rest x

Can I suggest hypnobirthing as an alternative choice? C-sections are major operations and I imagine can have difficult recoveries. I did hypnobirthing with my first and had an amazing birth. It is all about preparing you for labour and removing the fear for you ❤️ obviously it's totally your choice so feel free to ignore this comment. Just thought I'd suggest in case you'd never heard of it xx

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