Arguing about Circumcision

I ultimately left that decision to my husband because I don’t have a penis and I felt uncomfortable making a decision that would ultimately affect my son for his entire life. However, I don’t think people are fully informed (including me before we made the choice) but circumcision is more than cosmetic. It prevents lots of diseases and lowers the risk of some cancers!

I got my boy circumcised at 22 days old. As long as they are under one months they won’t have any bleeding and very minimal pain. When he grows up he will appreciate it him self and not just your husband.

It’s unnecessary 100% Matching dad is a pathetic reason @Abbigail evidence. Provide evidence of your claims.

My husband and I have 3 boys together and I let him decide on circumcision as I do not have a penis. also I had a bad experience from being with someone who was not cut, and I’m not sure if it was a hygiene thing or if it was just from him being uncut.

My husband and I both felt it unnecessary to circumcise our son. My husband is uncircumcised as well and knows it’s not difficult to just clean yourself. There’s pros and cons to both I suppose

I left the decision up to my baby’s father because I don’t have a penis. I would get the same respect if it was something for a girl because my partner understands that he doesn’t have a vagina so it’s not up to him. But in the hospital they informed me of how it prevents diseases, cancer, and infections. My baby boy is making his way to 6 weeks post circumcision and he’s fine. He got his done the same day we left the hospital. We had no issues with his private part while healing.

We decided to do it because of my dad. My grandmother didn't get him done and out of all 5 boys he ended up getting and infection when he was 8 and ended up needing to have it done. He still remember the pain of having to get it done. Also, I looked into worst case and if my son did need to get it done later in life due to infection, he would have to wait 2 to 3 years to get the surgery completed. So not only would he have to remember the pain of the surgery but he would also have to live in constant daily pain for 2+ years. There is always a risk and chance despite being clean and doing all the right things. If the risk and chance don't seem high to you than don't do it, but I know for myself personally, if something ever did happen I know I would feel like the world's most helpless mom because there is nothing I could do to stop the pain from an infection for my son

I left the decision up to Dad for whether our son was or wasn’t . He was at birth and it was fine he didn’t even cry and healing was fast and easy . Dad was very informed and had stories of friends who weren’t who wished they were for reasons other than cosmetic. Ultimately you have to do what’s best for your family and decide if that’s a fight you want to have for the next how many ever years

Here’s my input.. both my boys are circumcised, both my nephews are not. My nephews father wanted them to match him, my husband wanted our boys to match him. I know several women who chose not to and then their sons got circumcised as adults because it was inconvenient being uncircumcised. Is much more painful as an adult so I’ve heard. I think both sides have merit, but ultimately I do think the father should have the stronger say. Both my boys slept through their circumcisions. HOWEVER, our 8 month old has had adhesion which we had no idea was a thing and if we don’t keep the skin separated then he will need to be recircumscised. Any reason either parent has is valid. I feel like saying that “matching dad” is a pathetic reason is devaluing your husbands input as father. I also think at the end of the day if you disagree strongly with your husband, it is your decision! Ince you’ve listened to your husband’s input openly and discussed pros and cons, I think you’re able to make an

Informed decision yourself

Left the decision up to my son’s father and he chose to have him circumcised. I don’t have that body part but from the discussion we had…I think for my son’s father…it was more than just wanting them to have the same privates. But I don’t know all the issues men have with being uncircumcised. Apparently it’s a few factors. I do know I had an ex that actually had an accident and ripped his…foreskin? And they had to circumcise him at 30 so I mean I personally was all for circumcision because that looked incredibly painful when it happened.

When it comes to raising a boy a lot of decisions you’ll have to leave to your husband. Although I was worried I left the decision to my partner to make and he felt that our son should be circumcised.

In my opinion there’s valid arguments for both sides. I was on the fence, but ultimately allowed my man to make then decision. My only stipulation is he has to be there to supervise if the dr allows (some will, some won’t).

Ugh I disagree with everyone saying to leave it up to the husband. My husband is uncircumcised so thank fuck we didn’t have this argument but there’s no way in hell I would back down. This is a hill I would die on. My boy is uncircumcised and I’m pregnant with another who will also be uncircumcised. Religion and cosmetic are the only arguments and they are not valid arguments to me. Yes, increase risk of UTI could be likely but as you already know, you can teach them proper hygiene. My boy at 4 years old knows how to properly wash his penis in the bath all on his own. I just remind him like I remind him to brush his teeth. All that being said, my mother in law had this same argument with her husband. Her husband was insistent on circumcising the boys, my husband. She tells me she felt insanely guilty giving in to him, and they scheduled the appointment. The office called the day before to cancel because the doctor was sick and she tells me she was so happy b/c it never felt right..

…she saw it as a sign and never rescheduled and stood her ground. She had another son after my husband about 8 years later and made the same choice to not circumcise. Also I have seen the circumcised penises of my friend’s babies and holy fuck it gives me the shivers. It is not a pretty site and takes a long ass time to heal properly. Girl stand your ground. It’s nothing but genital mutilation to me.

@Chella did their doctor botch it or something? It literally took a couple days and it was healed completely. I mean idk about a pretty sight…it’s a baby penis but it definitely healed pretty much before I left the hospital.

It’s totally up to you as parents, we’ve had our boy done as every male on dads side of the family have had medical reasons later on in life and had to go through it at a much older age. You both know what’s best try to just have a calm conversation bring your reasons why you don’t want it but be open minded to what your parent is also saying and hopefully you can come to a decision x

I left the decision to my husband but we both became informed on how to properly care and clean for being uncircumcised and agreed it’s a terrible excuse just for cosmetic reasons. Ask your husband why he wants them to match so bad and why his son will be looking at his(dad’s) penis? I never understood men that give that as their only reason

@Em not everyone makes decisions based on evidence. Everyone is allowed to make the decision they feel is right for their family.

I left the decision up to my husband. I would like to have my baby circumcised bc of the risk of constant infections and among other reasons but ultimately it’s not my decision. My husband is circumcised. And he hates it. I feel that bc I don’t have a penis I can’t and I won’t make that decision for my baby. My husband thinks we should let our baby make the decision to have it done when he’s old enough to understand it and make an informed/educated decision himself

We decided not to. At first my husband was all for it but once we did some research and saw that almost everywhere else on earth didn’t do it, we realized it’s really unnecessary. Also, we’re both anxious people and the thought of worrying about the new incision possibly getting infected or the skin growing back on top of the other first time parent worries made the decision easy to not do it

my husband and i decided to have our son done, not only for cosmetic reasons and dads preference, but ultimately for hygiene reasons. i can't imagine having to take my 6 year old to have a circumcision because of an infection. boys are handsy, and kids aren't always gonna wash their hands. but if i'm being honest, it was traumatizing for me. i'll never forget it. but id absolutely do it again to avoid it down the line.

Don’t let him pressure you. Your sons body is not his body to make those decisions for him, whether he’s a man or not

The amount of women on here who have NO IDEA about penis health is ridiculous

This was tough for us, too. We decided to circumcise my son to help prevent infections and because we worried about how he might feel later if he's not and like his friends are. Admittedly, the second reason is not as important. But that's what we felt good about. I can see both sides of you and your husband's argument and I think your points are both valid. If you wait, you could let your son make that choice when he's older, but he will probably feel more pain and definitely remember it. If you do it now, you could be saving him from that in the future. But there's also a chance he wouldn't care enough to do it himself. So it's hard to say. I can't say firsthand, being a woman, but I would guess, your son is more likely to be upset later on if he wanted to be circumcised and wasn't already, then he is to want to be uncircumcised. Just a guess. Ultimately, you need to find some kind of compromise you both feel good about because you are a parenting team. ❤️

I think having that skin protects the penis you just have to teach them they need to pull it back a little to clean me and my BF both agree on this

We had our son circumcised and I am so glad we did. Theres so many medical and hygiene reasons to get circumcised you can always phone up a climic and get information/advice so you make an informed decision 😊

It’s your decision but personally both of my sons weren’t in pain… i heard it doesn’t hurt them and both times when they came back to me after the circumcision they were perfectly fine, not even fussy and wiping them didn’t hurt…

I’m 22 weeks today. I haven’t thought about this and appreciate the discussion. Gives me and my partner A LOT to think about.

I don’t think it’s a decision you should solely leave to your significant others to make. I believe both parents should be equally involved in something that major. And adequate research should be done for both sides, by both parents. A lot of men end up choosing circumcision simply they’re circumcised, and not for any medical reasons and/or benefits. There are definitely pros and cons to both.

Had my son circumcised and currently pregnant with another boy who I will have circumcised. My boy slept through his but make sure you get it done (if you decide too) as early as possible and not wait 3-4-5 months >.< i heard it hurts more then and the babies more active so its painful for them.

I never would even consider genitally mutilating my baby

@Melissa how is it lazy? Do u have a penis? Do u know how to clean one? Do u know if no research was done by the mother? U don’t. I’ve done enough research that I feel like my son should have the procedure. But my husband is against it BC he is circumcised. I personally don’t think it’s an argument worth fighting so i ultimately decided to give that choice to my husband for several reasons. He has his reasons for not wanting it done and I respect that. Letting my husband solely make a decision about OUR son has nothing to do with being lazy but letting him also be a parent

When my wife was pregnant, we went back and forth on the topic as well. (I wanted it, and she didn't care to do it) In the end, we went for it. (It's a cultural and religious thing for my family) The process literally took 10 minutes and then another 10 minutes to monitor him after the process. They brought him back into the room, and he was 100% ok, not crying or anything. And then we were discharged the same day. However, that 1st night at home, he cried 😢 the night from the pain (I think the local anesthesia wore off), but after that, 1st night, he was just fine 100%. He completely healed in exactly 1 week (redness on the tip). If you do decide to go through with it, make sure to put A&D on it after every diaper change.

@Melissa you should not come on here calling mothers lazy, it’s offensive. There’s a way to convey your opinion without slandering others!

My husband is, but our sons aren’t / won’t be. The foreskin supports sexual function in adulthood. When my son was in NICU I heard a circumcision happening in their operating room just off the ward. Wasn’t even my son and I was bawling listening to this poor baby crying.

I have two boys, neither one is circumcised. We taught them both from early age how to wash properly. Explained how dirt and sweat collect in the folds of the skin and needs to washed carefully and gently. My oldest boy is 12 abd youngest boy almost 5. Neither one has had a problem ever

It is definitely cosmetic unless it’s for religious purposes or later in life there are medical reasons for it. I agree with you, it is completely unnecessary and not yours or your husband’s body to decide. It’s baby’s body, I don’t think something completely unnecessary and permanent should be done to a baby’s body. It was done to my husband and he resents his mother for making that decision for him because it was a trend. It’s an unnecessary and painful surgery. You are baby’s mother, you are growing baby, you have mother’s instincts and should trust them. Your baby looking like his dad shouldn’t have anything to do with it in my opinion, baby already has 50% of dad’s genetics, what more could he want?

I'm guessing this is an American thing? Here in the UK its not performed unless medically necessary or for religious reasons... Keeping clean is tought, there really isn't any need for it in that regards and just because his dad has it done really doesn't mean baby has it have it done too...

I’m from the UK so it’s not something that is routinely done unless for religious reasons as far as I’m aware. Not remotely something I would be interested in for my son. To me it is the same as FGM, I can’t see the difference personally

Circumcision for non-religious practice is pretty much unheard of in most European countries, so not something that ever crossed my mind with my son. Even if it was the norm though, I can’t see myself ever doing that to him, especially for the sake of aesthetics. In answer to the hygiene argument, it’s no different to teaching your daughters to wipe front to back really 🤷🏻‍♀️ He is 9 now and has never had any problems.

@Em every single doctor I spoke to before giving birth has said this. And pediatricians afterwards. I’m not here to argue or push anyone in a certain direction. It’s just what we learned before our boy was born. I do want to add, my husband and I had conversations about it. But I gave him the final say. I feel like it’s okay to let my partner have the final say in this instance since I typically do in every other situation (of course taking every opinion into consideration and have conversations about it.)

@Rebecca FGM has no health benefits and has many negative implications. Circumcission has no negative implications but many health benefits so you cant really say they are the same

Me and my boyfriend went through the same thing… ultimately decided not to go through with it because I really didn’t find the need to have it done / put him OR myself through it. Will make sure I teach him how to properly keep it clean.. there’s no right or wrong way for it to look so even if someone ever said something about him being uncircumcised it’s not like he’s the only one on the planet..

@Merve that’s not true. The foreskin has double the nerve endings than a clitoris has for one example. It can impede sexual function later in life. And as for preventing infections and cancers, just like girls proper hygiene takes care of it for the majority of cases nor do we tell girls to chop off genitals to prevent infection or cancers

@Porshia I did a lot of research on this topic and I have not come across any scientific study that has concluded circumcission can impede sexual function. If that was the case the NHS would not even allow it to be practiced. But there are studies to show the positive affects such as 60% less likely to catch HIV

@Porshia Just to add, I completely respect everyones own decision regarding this topic but I would want to know if there is actually any scientific evidence to show negative affects of this practice

@everyone I am surprised by the amount of comments left on this post. It made me feel more comfortable to put my foot down and stand by my decision to not want it done after seeing the amount of moms who agree with me. So thank you. I also was surprised to see the amount of moms that just let their husbands/partners make that final decision.

@Abbigail I live in a country where circumcision isn’t common and. I’ve never met a person with penis cancer or hygiene issues. Financial gain is the only real reason

Unless medically necessary I don’t see the reasons ! I had a ex that needed it done at 18 because of a medical issue and he found it excruciating so if your going to do it I’d say younger the better x