Love my kids but regret parenthood.
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Thanks guys
I made the same mistake but I wouldn’t trade my kids for anything in the world. Perhaps, because I had them after losses and later in life, I have a different appreciation for being their mom and don’t mind being single parents. Life has thrown me to the curb more than once and I always found a way to get back on my feet stronger. I find what helps is to set boundaries with your kids. Tell them you also need your own time. I used to set up a save playing quarter for my first daughter and just read a book or put on a face mask. It took us a while for her to understand that mommy loves her and just needs to have quiet time. Now she’s 6. She enjoys quiet time by herself, offers to play with her sister so I can have quiet time. I’m not boasting. I’m just trying to tell you that this phase will pass. Your kids will get older and won’t need all of your attention. You will get your life back. It’s common for us single moms to feel the way you do. If you’re in my area, we can meet up.
Mamma hang in there 🩷 I’m similar and different situation. Being default parent is hard, and unless you are in position, nobody will understand how tiring cleaning and cooking can be when you do it over and over again. Which no “me time”, what I do when I get desperate for a shower is take the little one with me and the older one gets tablet time or tv or whatever she wants. Just so she stays in one spot for those 15/20min. Maybe you could try that?
I felt this way for years but it does get better. With therapy and the right support it will be okay. My daughter is 17 and on the spectrum and it’s been so hard. I’m isolated a lot but I love her more than anything and wouldn’t change her for the world. You’re going to get through this and be okay.
You really need to reach out for support and build community. I feel the same with not having my own life and feeling like just a mum. Also going through a break up from a toxic relationship Please reach out if you want to. You have people that can be supportive
My kids are SUPER HARD. But every thing happens for a reason. I was literally given these two so I know I'm supposed to their mom but doing it alone is killing me. I absolutely feel and am in the SAME BOAT- HERE FOR SUPPORT
Every momma struggles in one way, but pllllllease be careful when calling your kids idiots. 😔. My daughter’s father isn’t in the picture either and when he decides to pop in after being “out” - he is also seen as “the fun dad”. It’s maddening and it’s bullshit, I can’t agree with you more on this part!!!!! Take care as best as you can..
@Casey reach out to who exactly? I've tried church( people have their own lives plus I feel they're just doing Christian duties and checkingnit off their Christian to-do list. Not really interested in forming a bond with me), therapy( insurance is gone. Out of pocket is 300 to start 150 to continue which I don't have) I've tried making mom friends at play places and they just fizzled and went no where.
@Lauren not my kids. I said my kid's dad is an idiot. I'd never say Mt kid's are idiots. They're innocent.
Ohhhhhhh okay! Excuse the error, that was unintentional. And I can also agree with that. My ex is an idiot too…
Everyday I feel this I love my kids but hate this life single mom of 2 under 2 no dad in the picture 0 friends no help I'm really shocked I'm not In a psych center
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I’m sorry, I struggle to see how having children is a mistake. Our lives basically change so drastically when we have children, it’s not an easy adjustment. If anyone’s parents told them they made a mistake having children because life is hard, how would they feel? I know I would be devastated. My own father told me my parents argue because of me, it left me heartbroken and my relationship with them was never the same. Find your tribe to get some help, as hard as it can be, get some help. Our children did not ask to be born, if we as parents can’t cope it’s not our children’s fault.
I am sorry you’re going through this. Maybe trying daily affirmations & guided meditation videos on youtube would help you, and remember to breathe. Just search those two things and you will find a-lot available. How many kids and what ages are they? Very little kids are always the most exhausting but encouraging just lots of solo playtime & educational tv can give you a bit of downtime too. The older they get, the more independent & relaxed they usually become but start trying to create that space for relaxation & respect of your space/ downtime as early as you can. I could do it pretty successfully with my almost 3 year old around 2.5 years of age. She had to be old enough to understand what i am doing and where i am & feel comfortable playing by herself close by.
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@Chloe how do I find a tribe? I already listed above what all I did to try and find people and it's not working. I know my kids didn't ask to be here. I know. That's why I wake up everyday and live for them but it is a living hell with no help or little to half ass support. It just is. No sugar coating.
@Sam Same. 2 under 2 was hell. I keep myself sane for my kids to stay out the psych ward.
@Chloe kids r not a mistake but it don't mean that missing the life b4 kids is wrong
I can’t stand the three that I have but I’m the one that chose them and because of them I have my children otherwise they weren’t good for anything else
I don’t have the help either and my partner works his ass off supporting our daughter and I as well as his family overseas. I joined peanut trying to make my own tribe but no success just yet. It’s tough, being a parent is tough. But we do it because our kids deserve it, we owe it to them but they do not owe us
@Sam I didn’t say it’s wrong. I’m saying to make our kids feel like their existence is wrong is so terrible 😢 I am one of those
@Chloe totally agree. I would never hang this over my kids head. Just wish I had help is all.
@Estefany Right. That's all they're good for is being sperm donors.
You’re not alone. I feel this regularly. I see you mama. Please feel free reach out. My family is not just toxic they’re dangerous to myself and children I feel so alone most days too.