Obsessive mother-in-law

My boyfriends “mother” (his step dads girlfriend and we aren’t engaged or anything just have a baby together, but I call her my mother in law) is persistent about showing my daughter to the family. Minded she’s only a month old now and she’s been here and there throughout that month because of this woman. I’ve tried before to tell her “If Charlotte is sleeping, let her sleep” but for some reason it’s hard to get through her head. I’m getting to the point that my postpartum depression is making it hard for me to even take care of myself half the time and whenever my little girl gets woken up, it aggravates me (it’s hard enough to get her to sleep most days). What also doesn’t help is that she smokes in the house (in a separate room than baby girl) and she’ll smoke in the car (with the window opened of course). I get that she might’ve messed up with her youngest and done something right with her oldest and can’t have little ones anymore, but that doesn’t mean she gets to parent her granddaughter who isn’t even blood related to her. I appreciate everything she’s provided for my bf and I since neither of us have a job, but I don’t know how to tell her that I’m getting tired of her acting like my daughter is her own and trying to control everyone’s lives. My daughter currently has baby acne and is constipated (which idk how to fix that, tried changing the formula since i cant pump) but yeah… I just don’t know how to approach this issue without sounding like a complete bitch and getting possibly kicked out for speaking my feelings and truth about something.