When would you have the second child?

I’ve currently got a 10 week old and me and my husband have always loved the idea of having two children (definitely not wanting to have one yet, far to soon after giving birth 😂😂) We were never sure on when the right time to have a second would be, so I’m wondering what age gap people recommend? In my head I was going to wait 4/5 years until my little girl is in reception so that I get that break throughout the day to care for the new addition and to give them some 1:1 time, plus it’ll help me with feeling less overwhelmed if my little girl is in reception class by then. Just wondering what people’s thoughts are? Would you say 4-5 years is too long? I’m interested to hear peoples personal experiences with this. Thank you!
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if it helps, me and my brother are 6 years apart and absolute best friends, also, if you wait that long you won’t have to pay childcare fees for 2 children if you ever do go back to work!

I’m one in done lol that pain was surreal 🤣🤣

My little sister is 13 years younger and that’s not been great for our relationship. My partner is 3 years in the middle of two sisters and he recommends that. I’m thinking 3 years so that baby will be over terrible twos but still able to bond well with next one.

@KenDiana Lol to be honest the pain I was in put me off wanting more kids but since bringing her home I’d love another, just wish I didn’t have to go through pregnancy and the labour again as I had a tough time😂 My brain is deffo trying to make me forget how bad it was to trick me into having another

I took short videos clips and pictures to remind me just in case my mind wanted to play lol pregnancy was egh until that last month but the cervical checks definitely I knew they would never catch me in L&D ever again💀🤣🤣

Hahahaha yeah my husband has taken so many pics and videos of me and my sickness throughout pregnancy to remind me, and the labour too😂😂😂

My boy has just turned 3 and I have a 4 month old and I love the age gap it’s such a help that’s he’s more independent so can imagine 4 year age gap would be the same x

I have two sisters - one is 8 years older and the other is 6 years younger. I wasn’t close to my older sister until I was in my 20’s. I got along with my younger sister but I often felt very lonely and wanted someone my age to play with at home and go on holiday with. We’re all great friends now, but we’ve all said we would’ve liked to have grown up together and been closer in age. This is why I’ve had mine 2.5years apart (I would’ve tried sooner but was sorting out work stuff before getting pregnant). If we go for a third, we’ll do the same gap, so we’ve got about a year to decide 🤪

I'm due my second baby any day and there will be 2yrs 10 months between them which I think is a great age gap. I feel like my eldest is old enough to understand what's going on but young enough that he won't really remember not having a sibling by the time he's older, and they'll have similar interests as they grow up. I've found pregnancy much harder the second time round so definitely wouldn't have coped with a smaller gap. I'd say 2.5 - 4years is a good gap. 😊

For me, once they are out of diapers, big momma is out of commission 🤭. I cannot do the starting over thing. Even though my children are less than 2 years apart, I feel 2 years is a happy medium.

My girls are 20 months apart. The first 8 months until the youngest could sit up were intense. I would say a bigger age gap, maybe 2.5/3 years is a nice gap. By which point eldest could go to pre school so you can have some 1:1 time with youngest but they also are close enough in age to have things in common

My best friend wanted a 3 year gap but actually ended up struggling with infertility with her second so they have a 5 year gap and she was saying how even though she had never planned it that way, she really enjoys it for those reasons that you've listed! She felt like she was able to give the same time and attention to both and also have breathing space, plus her eldest dotes on her baby and helps out. I don't think there is a perfect age gap and there's pros and cons for them all depending on your personal situation! We have a 3 year gap which I personally feel is a perfect fit for us (It would have been a big struggle having a baby any earlier for us!) We do also have quite a bit of support around us too though which makes the world of difference (being able to have a bit of a breather from running around after the 3 year old and managing her emotions etc!) plus our second baby is much more chilled than my eldest so not sure if I'd be saying the same if she was similar 🤣

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