Cheating

20 yrs with my husband and I don’t believe there has been a year together that he’s been faithful. Last year while I was pregnant I found out he was on snap talking to a female he was seeing 4 yrs ago. Along with other females half his age asking how much for sexual favors. 4 month pp and I think about this 24/7 it’s driving me crazy. Any advice
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Leave him? He clearly doesn't respect you and knows he can get away with it if he's been unfaithful multiple times, and it seems evident he's not going to stop cause he can have his cake and eat it, is that an environment you want to bring a child up in?

Honestly if he already inquiring to pay for sexual favors I'm sure it's not the first time he's paid for it and probably not going to be the last time. Considering how easy it is for men now in today's world can just go on the internet and find escorts/rub and tug massage places. I'd leave him and find someone who's gonna respect you especially while carrying his child!! I don't know you but he doesn't deserve you.

Just leave. There’s no getting over this because he doesn’t care

Personally, I wouldn’t wanna stay in that relationship. Most importantly your child learns what love looks like from you guys. If he’s cheating, he’s showing how little he values you and your family. It’s tough having to break up your family, but as a child of divorce it’s way better to be separate and both show up rather than in a house where your parents hate each other.

20years? Girl, I left after 2 years of marriage! That was enough to realize he didn't care and was just going to keep on cheating.

My ex husband did that to me for the 9 years we were married as well as the 3 years we were together before being married. I think the only time he didn't cheat on me was the year he was deployed to Kuwait but that's not to say he didn't, there were females in his unit. I just became numb to it where I gave up caring. I was busy trying to make my 2 kids happy, working, and going back to school. He traveled for work and then military so he was never home. It got to the point that I was happier when he was gone than when he was home. That's when I released I was no longer in love with him and I asked for a separation which then ended in divorce

it’s the 20 years for me 🙃

I know it’s easier said than done but please leave… you don’t deserve that disrespect…

Sorry your going through this 😞, leave him u deserve so much better and deserve to be happy. He obviously dont make u happy. If a man really loved his partner he wouldnt be treatin an makin u feel like this. Says alot of how much he thinks abou u an his child 😞 sorry to say. Hope your ok xxx

Why on earth would you stay with this "man" for so long, create a family with him, when you know he's so consistently unfaithful? I'm not saying it's your fault because it absolutely isn't, he's a colossal dickbag, but you've fully enabled this. Get the fuck out, leave him, you're WAY overdue finding someone who actually gives a shit about you. My advice would also be to get some therapy while you're at it, I get the feeling your self esteem is shot to hell and you'll need to work on loving and respecting yourself before you can find your happiness. Good luck ❤️

@Lauren i can see what your saying but why does people always tell us women we should go to therapy? the poor women is asking for advice its not her who needs therapy its him by the sounds of it.

I feel for you as i no how u feel, 20 years is alot to be with someone and ur married to him aswell, and started a family. I bet when u first got with this man yous 2 were loved up etc then the shit kicks in . I dont blame u for any of this what your goin through i feel sorry for you that hes treating u like this. I have 2 kids and 1 on the way we engaged, house together, been together 18/19 years lately iv felt like im on my own an feel so lonely, i feel like hes havin a relationship with his phone. Not enough support at home etc.. we have spoken an iv broken down an told him how im feelin. I said before u try gettin out of things with what im sayin to u dont u dare try an blame it on my hormones as i felt lik this before i felt pregnant. We will wait and see if things changes this end i hope so because it aint nice being treated like this by ur bloke x hope ul be ok message me anytime u need to chat dont feel like ur on ur own. Xxxx

@Charlene I'm not denying that at all, he needs a lot more than therapy, I'm simply saying for her own benefit, to stay with someone THAT unfaithful so for long suggests very little self worth or self esteem, so therapy may be useful for her. If that's not the case then cheating can still be so psychologically damaging to someone, especially spread over such a long time. My dad cheated on my mum countless times over the course of their relationship and still now 11 years after they split for good she's still not the same woman she once was. I'm suggesting therapy as a form of self-care, so she can move on and heal fully from his awful actions

Leave him or open the marriage up (on both sides) you’ll either be happier or miserable with either decision. But what you’re doing right now is not accomplishing anything for yourself. You are unhappy resentful and probably disgusted with him. You will drive yourself mad if you continue with an unfaithful partner. I don’t see how a relationship nor a marriage could go on happy after legit 20 years of cheating. I hope he has gotten tested and never gave you anything. You do not deserve this life with him as a one sided open marriage without permission. Clearly he isn’t happy with the life he chose and has eyes for other (home wreckers) women, unless they are unaware of his marriage. YOU CANT HAVE THE CAKE AND EAT IT TOO

I wouldn’t even think about therapy as I’ve read above until you make the decision on what to do with your life and your children’s life. What you want them to know and see. What you want them to grow up with and whom around. I wouldn’t think of the years you spent with your husband either. That’s just a number. Think of the wrongs and the rights. Which is more. Which is less. Is it honestly a point to grow old with a man who has disappointed, betrayed, and disrespected you? To have your family living in a lie? Do what is best. If you love him and he loves you. (Which he doesn’t show it.) Open the marriage and become happy with each other and your life choice’s. Or remove him from your life immediately and indefinitely.

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From someone who’s ex husband did this all the time Leave honey and don’t look back To quote lion king “ Run…..Run away and never return” He doesn’t respect you enough to stop his habits He isn’t going to change My ex husband is going on 30 every gf before me and after me he has cheated on he got engaged to a wonderful woman guess what he did? He’s not going to change honey no matter how much you wish he would

@Yoli ok if you think that 👍. She only asked for advice like we all do on here, if thats your opinion then fair enough.

20 years, and you're still with him! Girl, you should have left his ass 20 years ago 😂 there's better people out there!

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