Maybe autistic?

Sorry if this is long but please bare with me.. Thank you if you read the whole story.. My som has been stimming before the age of 1 he would rock his head back and fourth and sometimes it would be his body. He hit his mildstones late as well. He didnt walk until around 2.5/3. He did speech therapy at 1 that lasted until the age of 3 and since he still wasnt speaking much they put him in preschool to maybe be around his peers and try talking more. Hes 5 now and still put his shoes on the wrong feet, doesnt bath himself, hates his hair being washed. He doesnt understand dnagers sometimes. He loves cars and trucks. He will line them up anywhere and if you move them he has a meltdown. Now when he started prek at 3, he wasnt listening the teacher. He would have meltdowns and when they happened the teacher needed extra support. He would throw things, run away, hit the teacher. The teacher would tell me that he prefers adults over his peers. He had a handful of good days. I would also find him playing in the gym by himself throwing the ball or something. Hardley found him playing with other children. So i take it he likes to play by himself. At the age of 4 we went to the CDD(center for disabilities and development, like a hospital) to get him evauluated for autism. They told me he was "to social" and diagnosed him with ADHD/ADD( complete set) abd put him on meds. Still we couldnt control the tempers, didnt understand what would set him off. At 5 he is in kindergarten right now, he still throws and hit the teachers and peers, at this point he DESTROYS the classroom. He still has an IEP in school and even thou he can talk some now he still isnt where he needs to be. He will still have meltdowns that sometimes last 30 mins to 1 hour. He will scream and cry when hes hungry, he doesnt get his way, someone has something that is his and they wont give it back or he doesnt want them touching it. He has gotten sent home from school a few times because he was uncontrollable. Now at this age, i find him randonly rearranging my tables in my bedroom, he still stims, lines up his toys. Defiant. He put his truck in the microwave and the wheels caught on fire and he found it cool and funny 😅 his meds dont work and his counselor feel like he has this symptom you can find in autistics almost like a tick.. like he says "no" "no" "no" when asked something but he doesnt comprehend it at the time and then 5 maybe 10 mins later it finally clicks and he may say "yes" I also caught him just starin at the cieling fan the other day. He will randomly blank out. It looks like his looking at you but really he went into a daze for a min and it took him a min to come back to me. Any thoughts? I added one way he lined his trucks up randonly.. i will add a picture of his stimming and a couple more of randomly rearranging.
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Caught him late starring at the ceiling but it was a good 10 mins..

He definitely has autism I have a friend who’s son was the same way but she got help when he was 1 and they even did a mri of his brain and diagnosed him with autism.He does therapy Monday-Friday and it’s helping him so much.He talks thru sign language.

Definitely sounds autistic my son does the staring thing aswel. we’re in the middle of his diagnosis, go tell a professional your concerns and don’t take no for an answer.

Trust me im trying. I believe he can mask some of his traits really well so the place that diagnosed him with ADHD/ADD said he was "to social" and even thou has adhd i still feel like hes on the spectrum. He has 2 half brothers thats on the spectrum as well. But i dont believe his behavior is from ADHD. I just think he dont quite understand himself. Like he wants to try playing with others(but i feel it may also not like others but he doesnt understand whats going on inside him) because once something goes wrong or he doesnt like something we have a meltdown happening. He tries to play with his sibling but its a constant battle of him hitting them because they have something of his or if there making fun of him and he tells them to stop, then he gets violent with the screaming and the crying...

Definitely from a non doctor perspective-autism. My son saw a bunch of doctors who refused to diagnose bc he can and sometimes will talk. He will make eye contact at almost 4 when talking about high interest topics. He lines up and rearranges toys and has massive meltdowns. I started Occupational therapy as they helped with identifying sensory issues which were contributing to meltdowns and also strategies for transitions and refusals.

Had to go to out of network specialist and just got the diagnosis last week bc current waiting lists for neurodevelopmental doctors are like 2 years in my area

I would suggest going to get an evaluation somewhere else if you haven’t already. That definitely sounds like autism. It actually reminded me of a story I read about a boy that was misdiagnosed with ADHD until he was 13 maybe and his medication weren’t working. After he threatened with s****** and was very depressed his mom pulled him out of school where he was failing. She got an independent diagnosis and he only had autism not ADHD. He took a year off school then went back online and he thrived and graduated high school and got a job and was dating and his mom was so happy she took him out of school and found help. It might not be exactly what you’re going through but I just thought I share it with you. Your doing great mom advocating for your son and trying to find answers. Best of luck to you both!

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