Medical traumas affect on intimacy

So I had a MMC that unfortunately did not pass on its own and despite surgery, medical options (pessaries) etc nothing work and i ended up having retained placenta for months and became unwell. During the time the doctors refused to say it was retained placenta and so I ended up having numerous physical examinations, most were uncomfortable but one was by a male junior doctor (who I believe did not mean to hurt me) however the examination left me screaming as he couldn’t insert the speculum properly and was just over all very rough and caused lots of bleeding. Ever since I have what I can only explain as trauma anytime my husband and I are intimate and without being graphic he uses his hands. Once we’re having actual sex I’m fine but the beforehand just makes me so panicky, my whole body goes stiff and I ended up with some bleeding yesterday because I think my body reacts that way. My husband is incredibly supportive so he puts no pressure on me what so ever but I’m wondering if I should speak to someone about this as I can’t carry on this way. Emotionally I’m over the miscarriage but my physical side is clearly still affecting me.