Picky Eating and growth delay

Hi y’all, my husband and I are STRUGGLING with my 3 yo boy. Sorry if this turns out longer than I meant. We don’t want to force feed him, but it feels like that’s the only way to get him to eat. Backstory: he’s been hard to feed since he was an infant. He would refuse the bottle/breast everything and go on hunger strikes as a 5mo old. He was just seen for his 3 yo check up and he is in the .16% for his height and .38% for his weight. Yes, those numbers are correct less than 1% on the growth charts. The Dr ran tests to make sure there was no underlying cause for his size and everything came back normal. He didn’t have any advice to offer from there just “monitor and we’ll see you in 6 months.” Now we’re at a loss, he drinks 2 pediasures a day about all we can happily get down him. He goes to daycare and they say he eats pretty well there but he gets home and he wants to play and chat. We sit down at the dinner table as a family 5 nights a week (he has swim and soccer the other two nights so we eat out then). He won’t eat anything we feed him unless we are out in public or it’s been cooked by someone else (we primarily do rice bowls with rotating meats and veggies). He gets distracted and wants to play or tell us about his day or show us a new trick he learned. We’ve tried including him in the cooking process, letting him lead the grocery shopping, moving meals to the living room, following him around with the food as he plays and even eating in the shower (most effective thus far). Has anyone else gone through this? Any advice on how to handle this?

Show your support

My 2.5 year old was the same. Wouldn’t eat for 2 days straight pure liquids and would constantly crave sweets. We did a Parasite cleanse on her and she is currently thriving, no food sensitivities or picky eating whats so ever.

Would you consider seeing a naturopath or functional medicine practitioner or paediatric chiro for some different advice? Doctors can only help so much. If he’s eating during the day I don’t think it’s too concerning if he doesn’t want dinner. Unless it affects sleep of course. I think the more you focus on it the more likely it is to continue so I’d ease off for a bit and engage in what he’s doing play wise and notice if anything seems off or he’s just in a playful stage? You could offer a picky plate with lots of bits that he can eat when he feels like it? Fruits, veg, cracker, whatever he likes?

Her behavior also changer dramatically, daycare went from constantly sending pink slips home to congratulating her for her positive behavior.

@Daisy Dorado how did you do the cleanse?

Was he in daycare or pre school all this 3 years or since he was a baby? It look like he wants a lot of your attention more than a task. Maybe get a small table and some days play with him and eat with him as if you were playing. He might be too excited to be back home and spend quality time with you. Book- "Being there."

I purchased one called Loxcell in Mexico. Its a one dose treatment. The pediatrician in my hometown recommended it meanwhile the one in CA told me its normal for toddlers to not want to eat or only stick to one food. For her it was chicken nuggets… thats it.

My daughter is super picky like she basically eats pasta every night. She takes multivitamins probiotics and fiber gummies because her diet is so bad she is chronically constipated. That being said it sounds like your son is excited about his day. Is it possible to devote maybe 20 minutes before dinner to just sitting with him with zero distractions and let him tell you everything snd show you all his new tricks? I've also found my daughter eats better basically anywhere that's not home. She eats really well in her carseat in the car. Yes messy but hey she's eating. I've also made her dinner and given it to her in the stroller and we walk to the park. If he eats well anywhere that's not home could you make dinner and maybe try having a picnic somewhere? Maybe a park and say if you eat all your food you can go play on the playground before we leave. Just ideas my daughter is nearly 5 and it's a struggle. I've tried all the things lol

He’s been in daycare since he was 5mo. We moved about a year ago and with that moved daycares but he’s been with his same class for a year now. His routine is wake up 6am, play with mom 6-6:30, independent play while I cook breakfast 6:30-7, breakfast 7-7:30 and then out the door for daycare drop off. He’s at daycare from 8-4, dad picks up at 4 and takes him to the playground while I prep dinner, they get home about 5/5:30, wash up and play with a parent then dinner by 6p. After dinner we play until it’s bath and bedtime. He has Fridays off school and spends the day with dad, Mondays are my days and both of us have weekends off. He’s an only child so I feel like he gets a lot of one on one time and parent bonding time but maybe we need to extend his playtime and delay dinner? We will definitely try moving dinner outside or maybe try an indoor picnic in a blanket fort and see how that goes. Maybe it will help if we eat as part of the play time instead of separating the two

If he eats in public and he eats at daycare, is it possible he’s just bored of the food at home? Especially if you generally have the same meals. It’s not much exploration for a toddler and this age is the age to make food fun because I haven’t met a toddler that wasn’t picky lol

I don’t have the same issue, so sorry you’re going through such an extreme eating situation. BUT like most toddlers my eldest refuses a lot of new or different looking foods especially vegetables. So I make this thing called yumm sauce and put it on his plate, it’s very nutritious but also has a great flavor and if you encourage them to use it as a dip or put it on rice my son eats the veggies or rice right up too, I’ll send the recipe!

@Daisy Dorado 👍

I really think a fluid trasnsition to home quality time and more present time being there at his level for family food time should help. Especially if you have a routine... sometimes routines bring the anxiety that after steps abc separation will return from YOU. He will eat at other circunstances or expiriences but in intimacy at home the separation clock turn on. Is he eating at the table or high chair? Try changing the settings to a floor picnic or child table low.. finger eating or he helps cook. More quality time in flow not routine Also when you get him from other places big hugs with no fake emotions. No "Yay Buddy" rush comment but more acknowledging he probably wondering how long before I see you. Wants to feel you are connecting and ask What would you like mommy Daddy and their name to eat at home together today.. even if you detour the menu... create that expectation of quality time around food at home.

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌