Am I being unreasonable?
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Your husband needs to protect you and set clear boundaries with his mother. He needs to understand that if he starts doing that, you will see more of his family because you will feel safe and protected. He needs to prove to you that he can be trusted to guard your boundaries when you’re there, before you can trust him to do it when you’re not present. Surely that should be obvious to him?
Urrrggghhh! Your partner needs to grow up and stop using your baby as a weapon. I went through this personally... my partners family wanted my partner to take my baby to their house without me there. This straight away was just massive red flags and made my wall go sky high, I've never had any issues with my partners family so why all of a sudden did they want my baby but not me around! I stood my ground, and it's ended with them not seeing my daughter very often and they have basically ruined their relationship with me and their granddaughter/neice. You carried your baby and birthed your baby..what you say goes. A baby isn't an object that belongs 50/50 to mum and dad. Your partner is being very selfish and putting his family before you, which is disgusting. Don't let him tell you what to do. Make it very clear "where baby goes mummy goes" until you feel comfortable otherwise. And tell him if he keeps bullying you it will just make your walls go up higher. Pm me if you like x
Why would a 3 month old be without their mother at their MIL house, ask if his mother did that with him when he was a baby? You may want to think about talking to your husband, he probably needs clarity of the fact that a baby needs to be able to smell their mum when they have bonded or this can be incredibly distressing for them. His mother had her kids and did her bonding, if he wants you guys to go over to hers together then that is fine, (a lot of MIL's are overbearing unfortunately 🙄). He can not however, purposely make your parents feel uncomfortable. Still allow your parents to come over, just ignore him if he is being funny, and tell them to do the same until he is ready to behave in a civil matter. Don't let your baby have to go without the extra love they deserve from your parent because a grown man and his mother are dictating nonsense.
Thats ridiculous. She is ONLY 3 months, its crucial for you and baby to bond. Noone else. His argument has no value at all. Stick to your guns. At 3 months old why does she need to be taken anywhere without you? If your mil doesnt respect your boundaries then of course you’re going to keep some distance… and your husband isnt making your family feel welcome which is affecting your support system and how does it make his argument any better? I’m sorry but he’s being an arse. His focus/priority should be on you and baby, not his mum. You didnt carry and deal with all the struggles in pregnancy for your mil or others. She’s your daughter, you carried her and now you should get to enjoy her however you want. Noone else matters. Its about being a happy and healthy family.