Why am I like this
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The fact you recognise the problem and want to actively make steps to change is brilliant. Do you have any children’s centres around you? They’re an excellent resource. I’d speak to them, they offer free support and offer parenting classes and skills workshops on various topics for different age groups. If you seek support now it’s not too late to make changes. Good luck xx
Don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s not an easy job to manage these little ones. Take things slowly. Try to meet parents of your kids age group near by for a small play date at park or at some place. It will help.
Oh love, you are absolutely not evil!!! That is a complete lie and I really hope you see that you are simply a mother, trying to do her best! You have a baby too? I have my August 21 daughter and since had another baby in Dec 22. It is haaaard work! My 2.5yo is particularly challenging and there are times when I have felt like I can't do this. Just like you, I'd love to be able to do gentle parenting but it just does not work with my daughter. I will keep trying it when I have a good day full of patience but the majority of the time, I have to be firmer with her because she's either a danger to herself or to her brother. I've had PND which has made me want to walk away too but I'm now on medication and it has helped me hugely. It has helped me take a step back when difficult situations arise and I am able to stay calm much more often than I was able to before. I also had some psychotherapy which gave me good strategies to help in those intense moments too. Have you had any emotional support? X
Therapy can help, also speak to your partner, leave the kid with him and his family so you can have a recharge time. Good luck
Really positive that you are sharing this and seeking help. It sounds like you are under a lot of pressure and need support - feel free to reach out if you live nearby and would benefit from some support from me. If not, it sounds like there are some good tips in the comments above, and perhaps reaching out to a professional will significantly help. Wish you all the best for both you and your son ❤️
@Charly your babies are closer in age, I had my second in Jun 23. Thank you for your reply and understanding. My partner tries to support me when I have bad days but I don't think he truly gets it. He's quite private and I believe he doesn't believe in therapy as I brought it up before and it didn't go anywhere. I have made a close friend from Peanut and we have so much in common and share the same kind of mindset, she knows I can't handle my sh*t with my eldest and she can relate.. but she doesn't know the full story as in the physical struggle i mentioned in my post. I'm worried I'll scare her off, even though she's very understanding and non-judgemental. Other than that, I don't have any emotional support. I don't have proper contact with my family anymore, my mother I haven't spoken to for years. My grandmother came for a tea for the first time in 4 years, we are slowly building a bridge and I don't think any emotional support from them is an option. It's a long story, they were very toxic before xx
Honey it sounds like you need some time out even if it was going for a walk once partner gets home. My little one behaviour is so much better outside. There little bodys have alot of emotions with at this age and its not easy time for anyone. The council run parenting classes about different approaches and will give you support. It's nothing to do with social services it's literally there to give you a little help and different approaches you can use.