Husband wants divorce, should I terminate pregnancy?

Nope not crazy at all. It sounds kinda messy and if you don’t want to bring a child into a messy situation then by all means do what you think is best

You do what ever you want, no one can tell you what is right or wrong. However if you do chose to keep your baby you can do this, you are stronger than you think and can create a beautiful life for you both. Again all up to you❤️

It’s a hard one ..if you have grown fond of this baby and capable to give him/her love you should keep I don’t think is a dysfunction ..

I’m sorry to hear about your husband that is not ok!! You need to do what is right for you and if you believe the best option is to not have the baby and be able to cut all ties then you should do it sooner rather than later. A baby is ALOT of work, especially if your on your own too but it is do able. X

After having been a single mom with an absent coparent before getting remarried , you don’t need me to tell you how extremely difficult it is. But it’s doable. Weigh pros and cons, whatever you decide is ok, do what’s best for you. I’m so sorry you’re going through this 🤍.

I’m so sorry to hear that you are struggling! I can’t even imagine how you must be feeling right now 😭😭 Even though you weren’t planning on a baby…I don’t think that terminating your pregnancy at 12 weeks will give you the peace you are looking for! A lot of people don’t talk about the mental and emotional toll that comes from ending your unborn baby’s life. There are so many resources out there if you do decide to keep your baby!❤️ it won’t be easy but you can do it! I’m here if you ever need to talk!! You got this, Mama! 💕

Maybe he can sign his rights over so then you don’t have to be tied to him forever! I don’t think anyone plans to be a single mom but here a plenty that do it because they love their babies! Don’t end your babies life because of him! You got this mama 🩷🩷🩷

You are already 12 weeks. Your baby looks like a baby. You can see the legs and arms and fingers and toes. This isn’t just a ball of cells. This is a human life. If you were only like 4 weeks or something i would be more supportive of termination if you really felt that was best. But you are already in your second trimester. Don’t have them stab your baby in the head and then use these scissors to cut up their tiny body so they can retrieve the pieces of your unborn baby that you have just murdered. This is what they will do to your innocent child who didn’t choose to be born. What if your mother chose to terminate you because the circumstances weren’t perfect and you would be ending life for all of the children meant to be born bc of your child in the future. I’m sorry if I upset you but I am very set in how I feel about abortions that aren’t 4-7 weeks or less. Please let someone else take your baby if you can’t raise them! There are so many loving people waiting to get a call

Not crazy at all. Do what s best for you. Sorry you are dealing with that behaviour from your husband.

There’s a few comments here that veer on anti-choice. I fully support your right to choose, and so I wanted to address some of the points they made. The fetus at 12 weeks resembles a baby. And 3 weeks ago it resembled a gummy bear. Fetuses change rapidly in the early weeks. It is absolutely appropriate to make a decision to terminate as early as you can, and 12 weeks is considered early as it is still in the first trimester. Additionally, the advice of “carry to term and give it up for adoption” may be valid, but completely discounts the physical and emotional sacrifices and toll that would take. There are plenty of children in the system, awaiting adoption or foster care. Your baby alone is not the solution to families’ problems and needs.

“Will you be able to live with yourself” if you have an abortion? What a rude comment. In contrast, would you be able to live with yourself if you bring a child into the world whose father is unable and unwilling to be a father? Whose mother’s mental health may be disrupted by this life change? Babies are a lifetime commitment. This decision impacts you, your ex-husband, and the future child. I say all this because it is *your* choice and I don’t appreciate the weird guilt-tripping and religious proselytizing happening in some comments. If people are anti-choice, that is their prerogative, but it’s unkind to bring those views when replying to someone strongly considering termination. To the OP, I’m so sorry that you’re in this position. I wish you luck in making the right one for you and your family. I was raised by a single mother, and it is incredibly difficult but can be done. But I fully support your decision to keep, terminate, or adopt. Wish you well ❤️

@Audrey You are misrepresenting studies, whether intentionally or not. First of all, most members of the medical agree that fetuses can feel pain after 24 weeks gestation. Some believe that they can feel it as early as 12 weeks due to stages of neural development that occur at this time. Again, this doesn’t mean that we’ve confirmed that fetuses can feel pain - it just means that what we believe to be developmental markers for pain perception occur at this time. It would be unethical to devise a study that looks into fetal pain. The position of ACOG, SMFM, RCOG, and other medical organizations is that a fetus is not capable of feeling pain until 24-25 weeks. This is based on actual data from premature and viable babies. It’s important to note that a debate exists around whether pain is truly pain without awareness of said pain. While pain receptors may fire, if a fetus lacks awareness, would they really be able to feel pain? It’s unlikely science will ever be able to answer this.

@Audrey Finally, an early termination is considered to be one that occurs in the first trimester. The first trimester goes until 14 weeks. Some legal bodies will consider an abortion up to 12 weeks to be early as a conservative judgment. OP is 12 weeks, and therefore considered early if she terminates even under conservative rule. Please educate yourself further before commenting. I understand you may be anti-choice, but it’s not helpful or objective to share misinformation.

I found out I was pregnant at 13 weeks. I told my BD and he immediately suggested abortion because “we barely had a foundation going” after two years on and off. When I said I wanted to keep her he left me. I’m now doing it all on my own and I honestly wish I lied and said I got an abortion and went through with it and kept him away. Instead I’m keeping him away and he knows I’m following through so I’m def always worried he’ll come back around. But I’m happy with the choice I made. Realistically it’s all up to you and what you want though. But from someone doing it alone trust me if you wanna make it happen you can 🩷 and if you do t want to that’s ok too ☺️

I am a solo mum with two chronoc conditions and no support system and i managed to do it by myself. I would keep the baby, especially since you are fond of it. That baby will be a lifelong friend, source of love and joy. Not a single day goes by without me thanking God for my baby girl, altough thr first 4 months were horrendously hard. Im looking forward to sharing my life with her. That baby is special and can be happy and fulfilled with a step dad or no dad if thats what will happen. 🌸

@Catherine please stop watching those videos as someone who’s had abortions in the past I can tell you they are not ripped limb from limb the only time they take the fetus apart is if it’s a late stage D&C. If you get the pills it passes just like a miscarriage and if you get a first trimester surgical d&c they suction it out in one piece. Do you not understand how small a fetus is in the first trimester? There’s no need to do all that extra stuff

@Catherine and that’s fine but don’t spread fear and false information trying to scare her into doing what you think is right

@Taylor, I’m actually curious… Have you ever asked to see your baby after they removed your child from your body? Did you do your due diligence to ask what they would do with the remains of the baby’s body? Have you heard of the black market? Do you know that planned parenthood is affiliated with the black market? Do you know they especially love black babies? You should do your research.

@Elo if it’s not viable outside of the woman it is not a person it is not yet a child it has zero rights it technically isn’t even alive yet so no it is not murder and that’s all I have to say on that 😘

@Catherine Again, you are being intentionally misleading. As others have mentioned, that is *not* how abortion happens. And especially not an early pregnancy termination, when baby is the size of a plum. Nobody is encouraging abortion, they are encouraging the OP’s right to choose how to proceed in their pregnancy. If you are anti-choice, just stop responding. OP is considering termination because of her situation. Stop with the fear mongering and weird guilt-tripping (“child sacrifice” - you have to be kidding me).

@Elo Your ignorant opinions aside, did you read the post? OP is married, had sex, got pregnant, and then her husband asked for a divorce. She does not want to be a single mother. Get out of here with your BS. The “child” you’re referencing is not a child. It is literally a 12-week old fetus with 0 awareness and no conscious thought. There is no choice involved here for the “child.” How about we respect a woman’s right to choose how her pregnancy progresses, whether she keeps it or terminates it? The woman is the one with a body, conscious thought, awareness, and choice.

@Elo plot twist….. I’m not Christian 😂

@Elo girl hell no why would I ask that ? 😂😂😂 they literally tell you everything they are doing while they’re doing it. I had the pills once and literally seen it in my panties before I flushed it and that was disgusting I would never voluntarily look at it Idc what they do with it once it’s out of me 🤷🏾‍♀️ it could be medical waste or used to make clones idc either way 😂 I’ve never had an abortion at planned parenthood as the ones in my state don’t do abortions they do routine women’s healthcare 😂 and all the abortion clinics here are in very well to do neighborhoods so clearly they don’t discriminate 😂

@Catherine At 12 weeks, the most common types of abortion are not D&Es, nor are they surgical. They include medication or vacuum aspiration. A vacuum aspiration uses a vacuum to remove the fetus and uterine tissue. Because of the strength of the vacuum, damage to the fetus may occur but the fetus is very small (the size of a plum or smaller). Vacuum aspiration is how early miscarriages are removed. No need to be sassy about whether people are okay with that. Nobody is getting a punchcard for abortions. Abortions are grave procedures, but people still have the right to choose them. C-sections are also grave procedures, as are transplants, open-heart surgeries… I’m not pushing anyone into an abortion. As I’ve mentioned, I’ve never had one and don’t intend to. I support the right to choose. But, if we use your argument, you’re trying to push other women into keeping children they either don’t want or can’t support. These fetuses grow to babies and children. They should be wanted.

@Catherine Please stop mentioning me. My stance was clear. OP also mentioned she is considering termination. I’d encourage you to stop demonizing other peoples’ right to choose by using words like “evil” to describe a woman choosing to have an abortion. My personal beliefs are just that, personal to me. Again, it doesn’t mean I don’t support someone else’s rights to choose termination.

@Catherine I never called you rude. I called your comment rude. Asking someone if they’d be able to live with themselves if they terminate *is* rude. I truly wish you well. I respect your views and your right to hold your views. But the way you’re approaching this response to the OP is not appropriate.