What to do?

Were ya’ll in a relationship or was it just a one night thing? Personally I would reach out and fill him in on things and extend an offer for him to be involved. If he ignores you, says he doesn’t want to be involved etc. I would try to get child support. The least he can do is contribute financially even if he doesn’t want to actively parent.

We was in a relationship for a year, then we split up and go back together and split up again. Little did I know I was pregnant when we split the second time. This man will never give me CSA and is claiming that the child isnt his. 🥴 It is his. We argue terribly and he has blocked me on every platform physically available to contact him on.

@Charlotte take him to court when baby is here and they will automatically confirm it is his child and from there make him financially responsible

Ally, how do I go about starting the process of taking him to court? I'm absaloutely clueless. This man is in 25k debt and can't physically pay for his other child, let alone mine.

@Ally Ally, how do I go about starting the process of taking him to court? I'm absaloutely clueless. This man is in 25k debt and can't physically pay for his other child, let alone mine. X

Get a blood test You may have to look into getting a full time job

I wouldn’t message him. He’s a dirt bag and if he wanted to contact you, he would have done it. The courts can contact him. Don’t chase after someone who clearly doesn’t want anything to do with you or his unborn child.

@Andreia Levigne Ive already got a job but cant afford childcare on government support and 0 child maintinence from baby daddy

@Blair how do i start the process of taking him to court? Who do I contact?

@Charlotte ugh I’m so sorry! Sounds like a romantic relationship is out of the question and co-parenting may even be out of the cards. Definitely take him to court, prove the paternity. It will probably be dramatic and suck for a while but if it gets you and your baby even a little additional support I would go for it.

@Charlotte I’m not sure how it works entirely, but my mom was a drug addict and when my dad finally divorced her and got custody she was assigned by the court (state of Texas) to pay a certain percentage of her monthly income per child. Since she was a deadbeat and was in and out of prison he never saw much money but now that she’s sober and working (20 years later) and even though we are adults now, the government automatically garners her wages and pays my dad. She owes like $180k in back child support and can’t get out of it unless my dad hired a lawyer to absolve her of it.

@Ragain Thank you so much for sharing that. It makes my case feel a little less hopeless but I still feel hopeless!!. How much would it cost me to take him to court? And I still dont know how to do it. 😥 Ughhh! This is so hard! This man barely even works! He just sleeps all day.

I would just file for proof paternity after baby is born if it’s even worth it financially. You know his situation. If he’s super broke then I wouldn’t even bother putting him down unless you need help from the state. It’s honestly easier to not have to share if he doesn’t want to be involved then screw him. Find an awesome partner instead of forcing it with bd.

Message him ONCE then after that if it’s not a good turn around Don’t message him. An absent father is WAY better than an inconsistent one. Ur child doesn’t need a man coming in and out of their life when they want to

@Ayanna I agree completely. Im exhausted at the thought of all of this.

@Cassie when you say "dont put him down." Do you mean on the birth certificate? x

@Charlotte of course! I would google “how to apply for child support in your state”. In Texas you can apply online but I think you will need information about yourself and the father - names, social security number, birthday, employment history etc. probably would have to fire a lawyer to help confirm paternity and get a court order for the support.