My husband “caused” most of my panic attacks

Today I told my husband a hard truth. I have (and hide) at least one panic attack a week because of him. I love my husband he’s a great father if the world is mean to me I crawl in his arms and feel better however he is the worlds fattest laziest man. He weighs over 500lbs and can’t do a lot of regular things which places more stress on me. I was running late to work and working myself into a panic because I couldn’t find my purse he was in the bathroom when he came out I was hiding my tears from him I walked into another room calmed down, manned up and found my purse. Now how is this my husbands fault well he had to drive me to work but I took him a good 10 minutes to get out of bed it took him another 10 minutes to use the bathroom and clean himself up. I knew that if I asked this slow moving turtle of a man to help me find my purse he wouldn’t be able to. I was on the floor looking through the 5 baskets of clothes I had separated in order to fold them and I know he CAN NOT get on the floor. So I hid my tears and hid my panic. This morning I asked him to bring in my purse from the car while I worked my second job. He left my purse in the car all day because he was too lazy to bring it in. So I started freaking out in the car. We don’t live in the best neighborhood the neighbors have stolen his wallet from the car in broad daylight and if the cars left unlocked someone will ransack it looking for treasure. Leaving a purse in the car is like bait to these people but luckily nothing bad happened. Still I had a panic attack thinking of the what ifs. My husband was freaking out because this time I didn’t hide the panic. Finally when I calmed down I told him the truth I have panic attacks and I think he’s the cause because he’s lazy and useless. He was stunned so I felt like I had to acknowledge the things he does do. He helps the kids with the homework he works hard but I don’t have a partner in all of life because of his laziness, he blames his weight. At this point idc when we got together he was thin and like this so the weight doesn’t mean shit to me. Again he was stunned and I told him idk what I want but I don’t want this anymore.
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Maybe y’all can exercise together I get panic attacks and good music and a walk helps

Your husband is not the “cause “ of your panic attacks. Your thought process is, In order to get your panic attacks under control it’s important to recognize your own personal way of thinking that can be catastrophic and that’s of no one’s control and of no one’s fault. The energy you spend into the what ifs can be used towards challenging the negative thoughts. Hope this helps

Also with the weekly occurrence of them I would recommend seeing a therapist or primary care doctor for anxiety management?

Exercise together !!! Take classes !!

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