Does anyone relate?

Randomly throughout the day, I think about the fact that I’m a young mom and don’t have many solid opinions formed on things that my daughter may ask about in the future. I sometimes feel stressed as like I have to have those things figured out so I’ll be able to give her answers and provide her with a proper starting point with which to form healthy beliefs,… ! Am I just paranoid? help ;(
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I wouldn’t say “paranoid” but just concerned of giving your little girl the best. Which is a good sign! Some good advice I was given after our baby shower was— do not teach your baby to be a follower; create a leader who can think for themselves. If they ever have a question, answer it the best you possibly can, but when you don’t know the answer, do some research and learn *together.* We won’t know everything. We will not know every single answer our babies will ask us, and that’s perfectly fine. These are our first babies and I dunno about you, but I’ve never raised a human before. I’m gonna be learning as I go, as most parents do. And it’s gonna be just fine. Don’t stress out about it too hard! You’re still young too (or so you say!) and have more learning to do as well before she’ll even form sentences. Give yourself a fighting chance.

@Jessica I really needed to hear this, thank you🙏🏻🫀

@Ameera Any time, girl 🖤

It may be an unpopular opinion of my many, but I think its perfectly fine not to have strong opinions on most things. I feel like as parents one thing we should be modeling to our children is how to formulate an opinion and gather ideas. When she asks you a question that you dont have an opinion on, you have the opprotunity to show her how to research and how to formulate opinions from non biased information. For instance, I am not religious, but I know eventually my kid is going to ask about it. Ill take him to churches, mosques, temples, etc and talk to people there. If I know someone of the religion I will take him to speak to them. After he has seen all the religions I can show him I will have him write what he likes about each one, and decide which if any resound with him.

@Honor That’s also a cool perspective. As for religion, I’m agnostic so I am on board with opening one’s eyes and mind up to the various routes you could go with religion. It fascinates me. But my husband is agnostic, so I’m not sure how that’ll play out. And then of course we have our own parents who are religious: Methodists, Catholics, aaand… ugh I can’t remember the denomination of the third set. My parents are religious but don’t go to church anymore (my dad was a pastor and chaplain), and the other two sets love church. It’s gonna be interesting to see how that topic all plays out.

@Jessica I come from a multi religion family too. Some people in my family feel VERY strongly about which religion he should be. I can relate to you on not knowing how every thing will play out. Unfortunately I dont feel like some of my family members are safe to be his religous guide in to thier religion because they are too forceful and too judgemental. It sucks because my grandma is one of those fsmily members, shes a sister at her church and does sermons. Do you feel the same way ? Im not really sure how to tell certain people without them being upset but it is how it is, I dont want him pressured.

@Jessica @Honor honestly these are great contributions thank y’all so much🙏🏻🖤. I feel the same way about religion (even though I’m Muslim) and plan to implement what Jessica suggested just because I wished I had that as a child 🥲. I meant more in terms of like morality I guess— not sure how to describe what I mean lol. But surely y’all are appreciated thank you

@Honor Oh I certainly get that. I won’t feel comfortable letting others persuade my little girl about religion. My husband just said he’ll support what she wants to do and I agree with being hands on in showing the different options. But he thinks grandparents won’t interject. I think differently!

@Ameera Morality is one of those things all human beings have from a young age. My 11 month old shares treats with his dog after never having been taught that. Hes tried to share a lot of things like blocks and toys with the dog and realized the dog likes snacks. We are born with morals, we simply need to listen to our spirits when they tell us things. Morality is learned largely when we violate our morals and feel that cringe. Sure we can learn to ignore our spirit but you will help her not ignore it. You mentioned that you are muslim, so you have clearly defined morals, and since im sure you behave moraly and I am sure you speak moraly, you child will follow your example. The fact that you are worried about it means your already doing the right thing!

If you don’t know tell her you don’t know but you can figure it out together. Parenting is a learning experience. It’s okay if you don’t know it all.

Because you're a good mom that considers it all when it comes to your child to give her the best chance of having all you didn't possibly .. I had nothing but negative for models growing up.. don't paint an unrealistic picture, but kudos to you for raising your girl right! Give yourself some real credit mama. She's gonna be just fine 😊

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