Mental load

Has anyone found any successful techniques on getting their other halves to take on some of the mental load? Despite the conversations (agreed needs to help but when it comes to it, doesn’t do it or finish doing it or needs a million reminders), articles and videos on the subject that I send to my husband (watches it but don’t think he takes it in), I am still the one who has to do all the research on everything, on top of the cooking and cleaning and being the only one who can settle our girl. It has really affected our marriage (the resentment is unreal!) and I am so exhausted, some days I just feel physically absolutely weak and am getting very irritated with everything and everyone. I guess I am just trying to figure out if this will ever change or do I just have to accept that this is my life now.

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Blue and pink jobs. We literally assign jobs to each other and then that becomes that person's responsibility. A tick sheet also works when we have loads to do. Visible and then we work through it. Can either assign to a person or just each do as much as they can? Hope that helps 🙏

@Emma thank you Emma. What happens if someone doesn’t complete their jobs? I mean we are all adults, so it’s not like you get in trouble but I feel like I always have to ask and ask and ask.

We’re a blue and pink job household too for the most part. However we’ve been this way since before kids which made it easier. I will say I carry the majority of the mental load when it comes to LO however he picks up the slack for this by doing extra around the house which makes it not feel so strenuous There’s no repercussions for not doing the allocated jobs per se but definitely helps if you want to make life easier for each other. My husband doesn’t want me to feel exhausted so is happy to help as much as possible around the house and in turn I enjoy being the one in control so he lets me take on all the planning and preparing and just goes along with it (even if he doesn’t want to) because I’m happy

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