Vent, feel free to ignore

Hey so I don’t really know what I’m wanting from this post. I just needed to vent this. I’m really scared my boyfriend is going to leave me after our baby is born. I’m due September 30th and I’m absolutely terrified I’d made a mistake. Of course I’m so so grateful and happy that Im growing a healthy little boy. And I couldn’t be more excited to meet him! But I just feel like my partner isn’t feeling the same way. Every time we talk about it he doesn’t seem happy, he doesn’t touch my bump, he’s not interested in feeling him kick and when he does feel it he acts like it’s nothing. Of course we talked about having a baby before we found out I was pregnant. He’s always seemed so excited and happy about it. This isn’t our first pregnancy unfortunately we suffered two miscarriages last year. We were absolutely heartbroken. I don’t know if him feeling and being that we is him just being scared to accept it in case something happens. But all he talks about is how he’s not going to be able to sleep, how he’s mental health is already struggling and the baby isn’t going make it worse or that we’re never going to be able to do the things we planned like go abroad, or get married soon. I keep trying to tell him that just because we’re having a baby doesn’t mean we can’t still do those things. We can still have us, we can still have a life together even with having a child. I’m just so worried that he’s going to leave me, but then another part of me knows I’m his world and he would never want to hurt me. I can’t help but feel guilty, like I’ve forced this upon him. All I keep thinking is that I’ve ruined our relationship. And it’s never going to be the same again. I’m trying to stay positive, and keep him positive too. I know that it won’t always be hard, I know there will be days where it’s feels like the longest, hardest day ever and other days will be a dream. And I’ve tried to tell him this too but all he says in response is that I’m being too optimistic and sugar coating things. Like I said I’m not sure what I’m wanting out of this post, I just needed to get it off of my chest. If you’ve read this far, thank you ❤️ have a great day x
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Realistically, your relationship and the dynamic is never going to be the same again, ever. Neither will your life, BUT you have to be understanding with each other, and remember to make the time for just you two. He’s probably just scared and that’s a normal reaction for something so big! Also, a lot of men don’t have the connection with baby that we have when we’re pregnant… because well, obvious. Things might completely change when babies here! Try not to stress and look at the positives.

I’m feeling you on a few things here, but my partner is autistic, so he’s really struggling with the changes. It’s been getting me down too, so you’re not alone in that one at all. I’ve found trying to give him a safe space to talk about things, and trying to involve him as much as possible is the only thing that’s working right now. My other half is trying so hard to get everything ready as well as I’m still working for the next two weeks and we’re due on the 11th of September. Personally, I think it’s just stress, nerves and that sense of responsibility that our men feel over us and the baby that’s going to come. Especially with the first baby, they feel like the world is about to fall on their shoulders, so just try to keep the lines of communication open and flowing (and I know it’s really really hard, but try not to react too emotionally to what he’s saying…try to see it from his point of view too as he’s probably just as scared if not more so than you are). 🧡🧡🧡

@Becky thank you, you sound like your doing an amazing job, and so is your partner. I bet it’s been hard for your both . The thing I’m struggling with the most with is it going emotionally about. I don’t want him to feel like I’m pushing his feelings aside. Bc that’s 100% not the case. But it’s so hard not to cry.

Trust me my lovely, I get you so hard on this! ALL I want to do is cry…but I know that scares him more because I’m not normally an emotional person. I’ve found starting the conversation with “I’m trying really hard not to get emotional but please understand if I do” or sometimes even through messages helps because we can say what we need to without the onslaught of tears You’re doing amazing though, you’re growing a human, and honestly, it sounds like his worries and fears are materialising because he’s trying to take as much off you as he can while you do that. I think his heart is in the right place

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