Feeling so low this time

I haven’t been through something similar - I cannot imagine your losses! I’m really sorry you’re having this experience in this pregnancy and I’m sending you lots of love! I did experience low mood and anxiety in my first pregnancy (mainly related to loss of my mum and other really stressful factors) and k went to my midwives, I got a referral to a consultant, I ended up in a group therapy with other mums. It was so lovely and we all had time to just be heard about how feelings for 5 minutes, we did meditation and visualisation, we also did some art related to the topic of the session. I found it the support I needed. I’m not sure where you are but this was in Bristol. In this situation though I felt like I wasn’t depressed as much as I was overwhelmed and it was effecting my mood so I didn’t think medication was right for me at the time.

I felt very low and disconnected at the beginning of my current pregnancy even though it was planned. Nothing felt real, I was filled with the anxiety of having been lucky to have 3 previously healthy births and what of my luck runs out this time. It was hard. I talked about it a lot with some trusted friends and eventually around week 15 or so the feeling passed and I was finally able to feel excited. I would definitely find some people you trust to talk to about the feelings and just know that it won’t last forever

You know my husband and I went on a babymoon to a beautiful beach and the ONLY thing I remember is him drinking too much wine at dinner and me having to drive home. We were there for a whole week and presumably had a good time; I looked happy in the MANY pics my husband took of me but I have literally no memory. I’m bipolar and was in a depressive episode (I got off meds for pregnancy). I also had 2 miscarriages before my daughter so I think I kind of didn’t believe I was really having a baby until she was here. Not sure which one it was related to!