Has anyone put a deadline on "fixing" their marriage?

When you know, you know.

Yes, with my ex. There's a point where it's not working and it doesn't make sense to wait forever for changes that will never happen.

I'm not married but I have a boyfriend. At the moment I'm staying with my mom and my boyfriend is in our house. He's struggling with so many things right now and needs to be alone to work out everything. Im not giving up on him just because theres a bump in the road. You both have to want to work it out and actually give it a shot. Can't be one sided or it'll never work.

Guys, please make the effort, whatever it takes, to go on dates! I see so many couples having their marriage die because they don't grow their love anymore! Are you going on regular dates together, are you experiencing new things together where you feel excited? This is what saved my marriage when we both were sure it was going to end. Now we feel like we are so perfect for each other.

@Daria we haven't been, but we don't have the money. I also just don't have the time / energy to plan things because I'm stuck doing most of the childcare and housework- despite the fact that I work full time and he doesn't. And he doesn't plan things - the most he'll do is whine that we don't have plans, or make a suggestion and leave it to me to sort out the details most of the time.

I totally get you and let me tell you, our financial situation is also not great so even though we aim to go out together once a week it mostly ends up being once a month, just consciously dedicating the time for it. Also if you guys have a deadline then you do hope for things to get better but it will not just come by itself, you will have to put effort in and its no shame to do some steps first as a woman even though I know you are exhausted. If you do value your man and him as the father of your kids then it's worth it. Believe me, you gotta plan at least something. Anything! Even if it's as little as a walk without the kids or a romantic evening at home without the kids, just the 2 of you and without the phone. If you surprise him and ignite a spark in him, even if it takes a few times, he will slowly start initiating in response

Question… what efforts are ya’ll making to improve your marriage? That is what determines if it will get better. Have ya’ll looked into Marriage 911?

Do you have anyone to watch the kids, like your parents or siblings? It can be just 2 hours but if you do it somewhat regularly and intentionally it could save your marriage, your finances and family. Also it's really important he helps you with the kids so you can pamper and take care of yourself. Believe me, it is only good for him to watch the kids while you shower or do your nails or have some time to chill without him and kids because you'll come back to HIM being a better, more relaxed and happy version of yourself, probably similar to the one he fell in love with and decided to marry.

But feel free to chat with me privately as I can really relate to you as I have been in such horrible lows with my husband where we were sure we would divorce and we turned it all around, mostly because of my efforts at first and him responding positively