Am I crazy for being upset?

So we are spending the weekend at my in-laws. My partner was catching up with friends, but before he left, I suggested he hang out with everyone he did for around 15 minutes or so and then disappeared. I realised he was in the study charging his phone and asked why he was hiding. He indicated his phone charging, and I said he could leave it and come out. He got weird and seemed angry. I said he didn't have to and left the room. I was playing a game with the kids and closed the door as I didn't want them to interrupt whatever he was doing or make him crankier. He stayed in there until he was leaving, came out and said goodbye, then left. We very briefly spoke on the phone about an hour later, and he ended the call with "have fun," not "I love you." I ended up asking what was going on, and he said he was tired and work was stressing him out. Of course, he's bloody tired. He only slept for 3.5 hours last night. I have no idea what triggered the work stress in that moment. I upset about the whole thing and feel crazy.

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Mercury is in retrograde!! 😩

The weird and angry is a red flag. Why is he being so weird about his phone. Why not just leave it on the charger and walk away… it’s like watching waiting for water to boil…why not spend time with his family while there… like it’s weird and your feelings are valid

straight up being on “vacation” at the “in laws” house has ALWAYS triggered something in my previous relationships before my husband. like we would be staying at my exs parents house and then boom suddenly i see messages of him messaging not 1 but 2 of his exes abt how he misses them??! like wtf and never a single sign before never had suspicions of him cheating before that etc. it’s like something about their little boy mind being back at mommy and daddy’s house in their childhood bedroom makes them think they can do whatever tf they want etc. no consequences

@Lyss, he's always been weird about it.

Ask about it without judgement when the emotions settle to get the real story.

@Megan, I did ask again, and he said he was doing work on his phone and that me interrupting made him lose his train of thought. I apologised and he said it was OK as I didn't know.

If he's always been weird about his phone, that's a sign of hiding something. What is he trying to hide?

He's lying. If it was true, when you walked in he would have said "I'm just doing some work" not "I'm charging my phone".

Who TF were the friends he was catching up with?

It sounds like 1. He’s avoiding his own family and/or 2. He’s msging the “friend” before he was catching up w them which is why he reacted the the way he did w the phone …..Do you know these friends? If you don’t, that’s suss. You said the weekend, how was he with his family on the other days, any tension? (I’m assuming more than one day there?) and if one has truly only had 3.5hrs of sleep, the last thing we wanna do is go out- we’d wanna stay home and rest, which he didn’t do and chose to go out but would make sense if he didn’t get along w his fam. And he left you and the kids at home w HIS family? 🤨 We only know the situation from the surface of what you’ve told us but he was either avoiding his own family or he was meeting up w someone suss and that was the perfect opportunity for him to go. I dunno. Lots of thinking on your part. Why did he choose THIS weekend to go see friends like why couldn’t it have been last or next weekend.

@Ella, he didn't say anything, just lifted his phone to indicate it was on charge. Also, the friends are friends from high school. He catches up with them almost every time we come up to visit his family. So every 3/4 weeks.

@Kellie, he often doesn't spend ages with his family and hides out in the study. It was a group of friends he had known since high school. They get together every time we come and visit because we live 2 hours away. We visit every 3/4 weeks. I do know them, have met them, and have hung out with them. There was no tension. We arrived on Friday, and the only family we saw was his Dad as we stay at his place when we visit. Yesterday wasn't even the whole family. His parents and 2 of our nieces. He leaves me every time he goes out with his friends. Nothing new.

Hmm. Okay but lifting phone could silently communicate "I'm doing something on the phone" Okay let's explore. Does he usually work on his phone? Is it plausible he could have been doing work on it?

Also side note, do you like his family? You don't have to visit so often

@Ella, he checks his emails on his phone, but that's it. I do like his family and he has to visit because his entire family and all his friends are in the same spot. He needs it for his mental health.

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