Do you count Onlyfans as cheating?
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Hope you are ok ❤️ Do you know if it to look at woman or a page for food or fitness? Personally, If it’s a woman I’d be pretty upset, especially 3 weeks PP when your hormones are everywhere and you need his support.
@Heidi, we've never discussed anything about if i was okay with him having an onlyfans account (other than the occasional you should start one kind of thing) i just tend to get emotional when I try to talk to him about things like this and I don't want to cry while trying to talk to him.
@Corrie honestly, idk. I only thought only fans were for looking at women, not also food and fitness. All it says on the bill is onlyfans - entertainment for like $5.75
I mean it’s likely not what he’s been paying for because why would you pay for that content when there’s so much free stuff to watch on YouTube or TikTok but could be an explanation 🫣 As some of the other comments have said I’d talk to him about it xx
I understand you haven’t specifically talked to him about only fans, but if the issue was about porn or something similar as you said before, it does fall under the same umbrella even if it wasn’t specifically mentioned. If it’s only $5.75, it may only be a subscription or video but I’d still ask about it. I know it’s hard to not get emotional but if it’s hurting you, it’s ok to let it out. I’ve had a lot of trouble communicating for just that reason and have asked my partners if I can text about certain issues because it’s hard for me to communicate my feelings when I’m upset. It’s not always the best way to communicate but some communication is better than none. It really eats at us and hurts us more than we know at times. Even a simple “hey, I noticed you had a charge for Only Fans. Can you share what this charge was for?” could help you feel less stressed. You can mention your feelings on it, too. Just know your feelings are valid. It’s ok to be upset and to cry ♥️
If you've told him before to start an only fans account then he probably figures that you are fine with this. What has your boundaries/rules been surrounding porn usage in the relationship? Because OF, if looking at porn, would be cheating if he's using it and knowingly breaking your boundaries
@Heather we've never talked about onlyfan. ( hes only ever joked about me making on to bring in some money) But I talked him about it and he said he hasn't been doing it using it. Ever since adding his card to Google pay and stuff like that he's had random charges on his card so idk
I would talk to him about it and see what his explanation is in a very calm and cool way so he’s more receptive to giving an answer but ultimately—it’s a breach of trust if it’s something you’ve discussed previously and isn’t being respected . For me, it’s ok for my partner to watch porn but honestly Onlyfans is different because you’re engaging with a person. If he tries to blame it on the lack of intimacy because you’re 3 weeks post-partum …fuck him (not literally, but like what an asshole)