need advice

I was in that boat for so long with my baby girls. It didn't stop being that hard until they reached about age 3. Every time I tried to get away they would cling so much more to me after I came back from my break, undoing all the replenishing I tried to do. They are still clingy a few years later when I try to leave. My 4th baby (boy) has been much easier to leave. What I have learned is that is makes a difference who you are leaving them with. My girls, left with a person who they know they will have a great time with, will be happy to let me go for a little while. If you desperately need a break to have time for you, I suggest baby steps. Instead of paying the babysitter $20 while you do a $40 activity, pay the sitter $40 and do a $20 activity. Give your caregiver instructions of what is expected of her. That she is off her phone and is responsive to baby's needs.

Invest in a good caregiver. Another baby step, get baby to meet your caregiver overtime. It can be a process. Have the caregiver come over to hang out with you. Next time she comes over, she can get on the floor and invite baby to play with her. You are still in the house and watching baby gravitate from you, to this fun new person. I love the caregivers that my kids ask for. "Mom, can you ... so Megan can watch us again?"

In the meantime, block times in your schedule when you can give your mind a break. Nap time, bedtime. Go to fun places where baby is engaged in what she is doing so she doesn't need you to entertain her. The children's library at the Salt Lake library has a couple of play rooms. My 18 month old baby boy had a blast there. He independently played with the foam blocks while I just sat. I let go of the guilt of being that mom who sits while her kid plays by himself because that was my break time. I am an involved mother. If you know of a place with a great sandbox or are able to have one in your backyard. Those things are lifesavers! Your hands can be engaged building something with your kid while you get to sit for a good long while.

Also, make friends! Not ones your baby needs to compete with. Friends who have kids who baby likes to play with. Friendships have come in seasons for me. If I have a mom friend with a kid who my kid is not compatible with, my friend and I take a break to let our kids outgrow their current struggles, whether it be pushing or difficulty sharing.

my son is the same way, hell be 19 months on the second, he’s usually fine once i’m not in his sight or knows i’m not there. but if he knows i’m in the same house as him or around him he’s so clingy and needs to be under me.. it’s very tiring but they’ll only be this little once sometimes i just sit down and enjoy that he’s wanting me a little extra🙏🏼❤️ i hope it gets easier for you mama

Mine was like that for a while, but now he goes up to everyone, especially anyone who gives him attention....or has food🤣

My baby was like this and is getting a little better each day. I got involved with a play to learn group with other moms and babies, I also put her in two half days (4 hours) of daycare each week. That has helped socialize her. I never wanted her in daycare but, she needed to be around other people. Being home with me all day was making it worse for everyone else who wanted or even needed to care for her. Not to mention I get 4 hours to relax, or be productive ALONE!